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Big loves ❤️❤️
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The love at first sight post got me thinking about the romantic loves in my life. I truly loved my husband for a long time before things fell apart, and I loved my long term boyfriend before that. Other connections have been intense but lustful instead.
So how many times have you been truly in love with someone excluding family and friends. Do you fall in love easily and can lust develop into love? |
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By *inkShyWoman 15 weeks ago
near Windsor |
I actually don't know if I have ever been in love or just settled because I didn't know my worth, and then convinced myself I was in love. 🤗 I found it far too easy to leave my fiancée and that made me question if I ever truly loved him. |
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I was looking at old photos yesterday and my ex and I looked so in love in them. And I was soooo skinny then as well! I wonder how much our currently feelings towards someone tarnish the memories we have?
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"I was looking at old photos yesterday and my ex and I looked so in love in them. And I was soooo skinny then as well! I wonder how much our currently feelings towards someone tarnish the memories we have?
"
About 18 months after our divorce I found the "pre-selection" wedding album with all the candid shots in it
We looked like we were having a blast, and we did, id just forgotten how much fun we used to have 🤷♀️ |
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Ummm I thought I loved my ex husband but came to realise not so.
I truly adored an ex friend and we both used the word love but it wasn't quite right for either of us, hence the 'ex', but looking back I have warm feelings even now.
So if counting up maybe 0.75 of a big love?
😁😁😁
I'm not expecting it or convinced it happens for everyone. There's just so much that can get in the way of finding your person.
Happiness for me is what happens when I just live and let things unfold. |
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By (user no longer on site) 15 weeks ago
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0 times 😒
And I dont think I ever will be truth be told.
I think its incredibly sad to go through life & not been in love. But I made my choices. No one to blame but myself.
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I'm going to assume that I was madly in love with my ex husband even if I can no longer recall it at this time...
My most previous ex is (and probably always will be) the love of my life. He still remains important to me.
The English teacher, but I think it was less about how I felt about him and how much he made me realise how I felt about myself.
Two other times I thought it was love and it turned out to be an addiction to toxicity.
So once for sure? Maybe twice if I'm generous? And a few other times where I felt strongly. |
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By *ookie46Woman 15 weeks ago
Deepest darkest Peru |
I actually had that conversation with friends a few months back
I honestly don’t think I’ve truly been in love yet and not with any of the men that have featured in my life not even my ex hubby
I say yet as it could still happen ❤️
It’s abit like the whole soulmate debate. I believe a soulmate can come into our lives but it doesn’t mean its forever |
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Probably truly just the once.. the impossible, all consuming kind. That said, there’s still life ahead, so I couldn’t rule anything out.
And yes, I definitely think lust can grow into love. When there’s connection, timing and depth I found the line between the two can blur
Ahh.. Chris Isaak - Wicked Game always feels fitting here 🎶 |
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I don't think I've ever been in that real deep type of romantic love with anyone. Not in a way where it's been reciprocated. I've never had a relationship that lasted beyond a couple of years either. I have had feelings for people that felt like I loved them at the time but never that "I would die for you and can't live without you" type of love that people often talk. Pretty sad when you're nearly 40 I suppose.
I often think I'm odd. |
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I met a guy off casual encounters when 19. Dated him for a decade, still my best friend. Only broke up as I transitioned and he likes men.
Met a woman out clubbing one night and she was sad, her bf had been mean and car broke down. I was out of my mind d*unk and offered this stranger to take her to work every day for a week and back. We became best friends. And then eventually left our current bfs and within a couple of weeks we were on fire it was so intense. She’s my wife now.
Think that I knew at a cellular level I had to be around both of them when first met. Just felt like thirst or hunger. And with wife I didn’t know I could like gals so took me awhile to understand why I was so sad without her.
And now get to have loving wife and hang out with my gay best friend and his husband all the time. Peak life. |
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"I don't think I've ever been in that real deep type of romantic love with anyone. Not in a way where it's been reciprocated. I've never had a relationship that lasted beyond a couple of years either. I have had feelings for people that felt like I loved them at the time but never that "I would die for you and can't live without you" type of love that people often talk. Pretty sad when you're nearly 40 I suppose.
I often think I'm odd. "
I don’t think that makes you odd at all.
Love or the idea of it shows up differently for different people.That kind of awareness usually comes from real depth. Sometimes it just hasn’t arrived in the right shape yet.
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By *orba69Man 15 weeks ago
driffield |
Twice. My 1st was an amazing lady , a natural beauty, sense of humour, great personality & body , sadly off her head @ times, we’re still in touch now virtually every day.. we both know what we’ve lost & it’s my dying wish we make another go of it. |
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"I was looking at old photos yesterday and my ex and I looked so in love in them. And I was soooo skinny then as well! I wonder how much our currently feelings towards someone tarnish the memories we have?
About 18 months after our divorce I found the "pre-selection" wedding album with all the candid shots in it
We looked like we were having a blast, and we did, id just forgotten how much fun we used to have 🤷♀️"
I've just been having that conversation, when it worked my marriage was phenomenal! We fully supported each other in everything we did, and we laughed and loved each other hard. It changed over the years and covid really heightened some of the cracks that were starting to appear and we took each other for granted. But that doesn't takeaway from how happy we were when we were younger. |
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"Twice. Last broke my heart 😕🤓🥷"
Do you think those experiences have made it harder to fall in love again? I'm far more picky about who I open my heart up to again, and I don't know if I will ever find that next love, or if I want it. |
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"I was looking at old photos yesterday and my ex and I looked so in love in them. And I was soooo skinny then as well! I wonder how much our currently feelings towards someone tarnish the memories we have?
About 18 months after our divorce I found the "pre-selection" wedding album with all the candid shots in it
We looked like we were having a blast, and we did, id just forgotten how much fun we used to have 🤷♀️
I've just been having that conversation, when it worked my marriage was phenomenal! We fully supported each other in everything we did, and we laughed and loved each other hard. It changed over the years and covid really heightened some of the cracks that were starting to appear and we took each other for granted. But that doesn't takeaway from how happy we were when we were younger. "
Exactly, there were lots of problems. I should have called it earlier (hindsight is a bitch isnt it) and the ending was horrendous
But we did love and laugh and we made a couple of epic kids 🤷♀️ |
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By *ace400Man 15 weeks ago
near knock |
"Twice. Last broke my heart 😕🤓🥷
Do you think those experiences have made it harder to fall in love again? I'm far more picky about who I open my heart up to again, and I don't know if I will ever find that next love, or if I want it."
I agree with this, I would need a woman to absolutely sweep me off my feet and accept the baggage I have |
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I truly loved my ex partner. She was my everything and I blew it all up like an idiot. We still talk, though it’s not the same as when we were together. She’s moved on and I’m happy (and hoping) she’s happy. I’m honestly too afraid of feeling like that ever again, though I wouldn’t be against finding love again. So I’m on here mainly to make friends. Also the forums are fun. |
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"I was looking at old photos yesterday and my ex and I looked so in love in them. And I was soooo skinny then as well! I wonder how much our currently feelings towards someone tarnish the memories we have?
About 18 months after our divorce I found the "pre-selection" wedding album with all the candid shots in it
We looked like we were having a blast, and we did, id just forgotten how much fun we used to have 🤷♀️
I've just been having that conversation, when it worked my marriage was phenomenal! We fully supported each other in everything we did, and we laughed and loved each other hard. It changed over the years and covid really heightened some of the cracks that were starting to appear and we took each other for granted. But that doesn't takeaway from how happy we were when we were younger.
Exactly, there were lots of problems. I should have called it earlier (hindsight is a bitch isnt it) and the ending was horrendous
But we did love and laugh and we made a couple of epic kids 🤷♀️"
I regularly tell my ex that if nothing else came out of our marriage, we did good with the teen. |
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"Twice. Last broke my heart 😕🤓🥷
Do you think those experiences have made it harder to fall in love again? I'm far more picky about who I open my heart up to again, and I don't know if I will ever find that next love, or if I want it. I agree with this, I would need a woman to absolutely sweep me off my feet and accept the baggage I have "
In the early days of single life, I was desperate to fill the void. Now, someone has to fit into the life I've built myself and accept me as I am. Standards are definitely higher than they were! And I discovered I was happy having fwbs who meet my sexual needs 😈 |
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"Twice. Last broke my heart 😕🤓🥷
Do you think those experiences have made it harder to fall in love again? I'm far more picky about who I open my heart up to again, and I don't know if I will ever find that next love, or if I want it."
Oh yes. Can I see it happening again? Probably not 🤓🥷 |
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I would like to say at least once, but as that marriage fell apart it does make me question it.
Its a funny thing isn't it, every partner I've ever had a relationship with I loved in some way, I'd like to say truly but they haven't stood up to time for various reasons.
However I always feel like it should be different like something inside should feel different, perhaps it does and im just not tuned to feeling or understanding it.
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Hmmm.... probably twice, many years ago. It was a form of love that takes away your appetite, impairs your freethinking and leaves you wandering a whimsical path to nowhere particular.
These days I mostly embrace a form of limerence, nothing heavy but enough to remind me of those love-lost days of yesteryear. |
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By *tumpsMan 15 weeks ago
Weston-Super-Mare |
Once, while I was in a relationship with someone else. I panicked so badly that I retreated from them and lost them for a long time. Happy ending, we're friends again, but I think I'll always dream about what could have been. |
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I don't think I've ever fallen truly, madly, deeply, so probably haven't. Plenty of lust and affection though.
"Lust is the difference between loving someone and being in love with someone".
Also find that rarely both partners are on the same page with equal feelings, although I'm sure there are a lucky few who are with 'the one' |
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I won’t say how many times I’ve been in love OP as it’s painful to do so. All I can say is I loved them entirely. And accepted crappy behaviour of various types because I believed they loved me back.
I now realise the power of my love and that it should not only be reciprocated but it cherished every single day. I worked hard to open my heart up again and then I met the most wonderful person here ♥️
Despite a tough life I feel lucky to have loved. Love is ultimately why we are human beings. |
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Love is a gift to be cherished. I am fortunate that I have found love when I least expected it and with someone I didn't think would love me. It is amazing to be wrong and I'm so happy because of it  |
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"I won’t say how many times I’ve been in love OP as it’s painful to do so. All I can say is I loved them entirely. And accepted crappy behaviour of various types because I believed they loved me back.
I now realise the power of my love and that it should not only be reciprocated but it cherished every single day. I worked hard to open my heart up again and then I met the most wonderful person here ♥️
Despite a tough life I feel lucky to have loved. Love is ultimately why we are human beings. "
This is so beautifully worded and I'm very happy that you have found someone as well. Although my loves have hurt me, I hoped I am not too jaded to love again if the right person comes into my life. For now though, I'll keep wearing my heart on my sleeve, learning that I am worthy of someones love. |
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"The love at first sight post got me thinking about the romantic loves in my life. I truly loved my husband for a long time before things fell apart, and I loved my long term boyfriend before that. Other connections have been intense but lustful instead.
So how many times have you been truly in love with someone excluding family and friends. Do you fall in love easily and can lust develop into love?"
Twice.
Heartbreak is truly soul destroying.
Yes I fall easily and lust has a part to play in it. ❤️ |
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"Love is a gift to be cherished. I am fortunate that I have found love when I least expected it and with someone I didn't think would love me. It is amazing to be wrong and I'm so happy because of it "
It is these experience that makes my heart sing and I live in hope 😍😍 |
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By (user no longer on site) 15 weeks ago
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"I met a girl almost 40 years ago & fell madly, head over heels in love with her. Quickly too. The full hit.
She still wakes up next to me every day."
Love this ❣️ |
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I’ve loved intensely a number of people. Still, I think I can count them with the fingers of one hand. 
