FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > When does it come up?
When does it come up?
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By *eli OP Woman 2 weeks ago
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Sex that is.
Sometimes when I'm reading messages, I'm ovulating or just generally frisky and I'm more likely to talk about sex. Don't really delve in to kinks after a message or two though.
Are you keen to assess sexual compatibility quickly? Run through a list of sex questions? When do you bring up sex with someone you're talking to/fancy?
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By *WB85Man 2 weeks ago
Staffordshire |
People's interests in their bio tell me everything sexual I initially need to know.
I keep conversation more vanilla until after a social. Because if there's no chemistry on the social, its never going to go any further.
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By *eli OP Woman 2 weeks ago
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"People's interests in their bio tell me everything sexual I initially need to know.
I keep conversation more vanilla until after a social. Because if there's no chemistry on the social, its never going to go any further.
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What happens if they don't have any interests?
Understandable, a social could be painfully awkward without any chemistry and various sexual scenarios discussed beforehand. |
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By *WB85Man 2 weeks ago
Staffordshire |
"People's interests in their bio tell me everything sexual I initially need to know.
I keep conversation more vanilla until after a social. Because if there's no chemistry on the social, its never going to go any further.
What happens if they don't have any interests?
Understandable, a social could be painfully awkward without any chemistry and various sexual scenarios discussed beforehand. "
I've been incredibly lucky and always had good socials in the 4 years I've been doing this.
Profiles showing nothing in their list of interests, we wouldn't be on a social on the first place.
We all need to make an effort with our profiles. |
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By *eli OP Woman 2 weeks ago
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"Get the vibe first, then the outliers (likes and hates) and after a couple of messages you'll know if you want to take it further."
So you're more a get the likes and dislikes out of the way and know if you're interested. Have women always easily discussed sex with you? |
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By (user no longer on site) 2 weeks ago
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"I tend to let the conversations flow naturally, if it leads to that then it leads to it and whenever that is, its not something i think about when talking, its just something I let evolve."
Yes, to this! If it flows into it so be it. I don't have a set guideline like ooo I'm 15 messages in.. Do you like the sex?
Interesting thread though, OP |
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By *eli OP Woman 2 weeks ago
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Profiles showing nothing in their list of interests, we wouldn't be on a social on the first place.
We all need to make an effort with our profiles. "
Because you're not compatible.
I know lots of women who deliberately keep the interests section blank for a myriad of reasons. Effort, or lack of, is rarely one of them. |
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By *eli OP Woman 2 weeks ago
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"Get a good rapport going first, I wouldn't dive straight in with it unless it was already initially discussed. Just let me know when you're next ovulating   "
Ha, I'm not that bad, don't worry you're safe.  It's more when I've been talking to someone for a bit. I'm mainly being nosy. |
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I generally follow their lead in terms of sexual conversations and how early they happen. I may sometimes throw something a bit more flirty in early on and if it's met with a straight bat, I'll back off a bit until we get to know each other more |
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"I generally follow their lead in terms of sexual conversations and how early they happen. I may sometimes throw something a bit more flirty in early on and if it's met with a straight bat, I'll back off a bit until we get to know each other more"
Joe is in the know |
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By *astpoetTV/TS 2 weeks ago
London and Southampton |
Straight in with a dick pic, then demand they perform highly specific sexual acts without showing any interest in them, if they don’t respond in at least 30seconds with their exact address I insult them and block them.
It’s the fab male winning formula*
*sarcasm and/or satire may exist in this message |
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By *eli OP Woman 2 weeks ago
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"If sex is quickly mentioned I assume it's a bloke unless cam or meet."
Yeah that's fair. I make similar assumptions about couple's profiles. Women generally aren't so quick to mention sex. |
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The older I and my potential suitors get, it tends to take longer these days. I like to keep my cards to my chest anyway. There can’t be anything worse than building your sexual prowess up for a huge fall if you’re not compatible.
Leave something to the imagination and some tricks up one’s sleeve. |
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By *eli OP Woman 2 weeks ago
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"I tend to let the conversations flow naturally, if it leads to that then it leads to it and whenever that is, its not something i think about when talking, its just something I let evolve."
So you've never thought, oh it's a bit soon to go in to that/receive cock pictures etc? Lucky. Sometimes things evolve a bit *too* soon for me. :D |
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I find that if people open with the sex talk then it often doesn't progress any further than chat.
I like a bit of mystery and frisson before meeting.
There's a lot to be said for intrigue and discovery. |
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All I will say is if you bring it up too soon, there's absolutely no chance your plans will work out with me.
That age old question of what are you into....nothing turns me off more than that!!
Mrs. |
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"Get the vibe first, then the outliers (likes and hates) and after a couple of messages you'll know if you want to take it further.
So you're more a get the likes and dislikes out of the way and know if you're interested. Have women always easily discussed sex with you?"
Oh god, not at all. Conversation normally is very very vanilla, the weather. Generally someone cracks a double entendre then it goes downhill.
I would try and get some of the basics out the way before meeting as well. No point in turning up in a gimp mask and they are dressed as a furry.
And a lot of this is vibe. You just get the feel or the ick or the hell now!! |
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I feel like if I'm not that into the person yet it comes up too early.
But if we've already established something there I want it to come up sooner and it feels like a tease to have to wait.
But I know it's usually me that brushes off sex talk. I'm ridiculous. |
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Unlike vanilla sites we all know the main reason people are here, that’s said we need a connection and to make sure we are all aligned with what we want.
Normally after getting to know a couple or woman the topic will come up but normally in a flirty way and always prefer to have a social because connection and character is the only thing that will get me to sleep with someone. |
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By *eli OP Woman 2 weeks ago
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"It used to come up very quickly but with old age it can take bloody ages.  "
Aww, you're not old, whateveryournameisatm. Genuinely forgot by the time I'd finished typing this. Sorry. You're still not old though. :D |
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"I generally follow their lead in terms of sexual conversations and how early they happen. I may sometimes throw something a bit more flirty in early on and if it's met with a straight bat, I'll back off a bit until we get to know each other more"
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I'm with Joe on this. I rarely instigate 'sex talk' unless it manifests itself on her behest. Sure, the conversations will be flirtatious but anything more tends to be from indirect questions resembling "what are your pleasures, what are you looking for aside from the obvious etc etc". |
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