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Men, a question*.
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"I cant speak for others, but I certainly dont get messages as frequently as daily. Few and far between is my honest answer. But, you tend to get a far better quality of message, from someone thats actually viewed and read your profile. Its a very nice feeling when it does happen. " I can echo this comment. Nice when it happens but these days I don't hold my breath. | |||
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"What's the general standard of messages you receive from women like? Do you get many messages in a day/month/year? What kind of message *would* you like to get? *It became three. Sorry about that." Never get a woman message first. X | |||
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"What's the general standard of messages you receive from women like? Do you get many messages in a day/month/year? What kind of message *would* you like to get? *It became three. Sorry about that." Don't know haha. Nah. Honestly I'm alright just hanging around, tips on painting Warhammer would be welcomed... | |||
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"Honestly could be due to a few reasons, my age or the fact I don’t drive but regardless of the matter, to this day I’ve still not received a single message off a woman on here. Spoke to them yes, but only when I’ve messaged first and even that isn’t very many. Kind of feels a bit pointless being on here sometimes tbh" You are not alone! That goes for me too. | |||
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"I cant speak for others, but I certainly dont get messages as frequently as daily. Few and far between is my honest answer. But, you tend to get a far better quality of message, from someone thats actually viewed and read your profile. Its a very nice feeling when it does happen. " I hope it keeps happening for you. 😊 Yes, one or two messages from someone who is genuinely interested, making a real effort is far better than multiple questionable quality ones. In my mind, others might disagree.  | |||
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"Messages from new people I've never chatted with - maybe 10 a week if I'm particularly active on forums. Half of these will be non-sexual, people just saying my profile gave them a laugh. The others might be flirty messages out of the blue or replies to messages I've sent. I can't say I get rude or abusive messages, but sometimes I'll get very short, blunt ones, usually from couples where the man is writing. And this is in no way consistent, week to week. Some weeks it's 0, others it's 10. Usually just depends on the effort I put in" Is it generally quite easy to spot the difference between the male/female tone? Being active on the forum can definitely increase the likelihood of people messaging. It's getting out there (virtually). Like going to clubs and socials, the more effort you put in, the more likely you'll come across the right people. | |||
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"What women can send messages too I assumed only men can send them " Ha, they do. And can. I think. Yeah, course they do. If the profile is one they want to. Such demanding creatures, women. | |||
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"What women can send messages too I assumed only men can send them Ha, they do. And can. I think. Yeah, course they do. If the profile is one they want to. Such demanding creatures, women. "Well that kind of fucks my self esteem lol | |||
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"Honestly could be due to a few reasons, my age or the fact I don’t drive but regardless of the matter, to this day I’ve still not received a single message off a woman on here. Spoke to them yes, but only when I’ve messaged first and even that isn’t very many. Kind of feels a bit pointless being on here sometimes tbh You are not alone! That goes for me too." And me  | |||
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"What's the general standard of messages you receive from women like? Do you get many messages in a day/month/year? What kind of message *would* you like to get? *It became three. Sorry about that." Do you mean they message me first? Incredibly rare. And usually it's about something happening on the forums, a challenge or a discussion and they want to have a private convo about it. I'm happy to have a chat. I don't think I've received any overly sexual messages from a lady. Maybe a bit of flirting after we've had a chat on the forums. No random tit pics or vag pics (is that a thing?) Daily? No. Weekly? Hardly. Monthly? Maybe a few. Yearly? Maybe a handful. I think the emphasis is still on the men to approach women. Unfortunately this is very difficult as there are so many of us on here and even on dating apps. Trying to come up with a unique intro that will catch someone's eye, appeal directly to them, shows I've read her/their bio, explains I'm what they are looking for, what an exciting time we are going to have and much much more, and don't forget to add a face pic! It's a lot of pressure and exhausting. I choose to be myself and relax. Most of the messages I send are conversational. A bit of banter back and forth. Trying to get to know each other. Unfortunately there are probably so many other men sending messages that it can get lost in the abyss. I can imagine it's exhausting for a woman to keep up with so many conversations, the ones that matter and the ones that don't. I would love to have a decent conversation with a lady, maybe about a shared interest or something they like about me. Or some shameless flirting. Or telling me if they are actually into me because I genuinely don't know. I'd love to have a social. Face to face is better. Tell me something about herself that most people don't know. And also silly stuff. Just be yourself. There's more to life than tits but it's a great place to start 😜👍🏾 | |||
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"What women can send messages too I assumed only men can send them " I recon I send as many as I receive. Mrs. | |||
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"Honestly could be due to a few reasons, my age or the fact I don’t drive but regardless of the matter, to this day I’ve still not received a single message off a woman on here. Spoke to them yes, but only when I’ve messaged first and even that isn’t very many. Kind of feels a bit pointless being on here sometimes tbh" I think that there can be various factors. A lot of women are still quite traditionalist and prefer to be messaged first. And then the ones who do, there might not be compatibility. For many reasons. If you're not enjoying it for any prolonged period, take a break for a little bit. Come back refreshed, see what you can do to improve your experience on here. Being on here shouldn't leave you doubting yourself. | |||
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"Messages from new people I've never chatted with - maybe 10 a week if I'm particularly active on forums. Half of these will be non-sexual, people just saying my profile gave them a laugh. The others might be flirty messages out of the blue or replies to messages I've sent. I can't say I get rude or abusive messages, but sometimes I'll get very short, blunt ones, usually from couples where the man is writing. And this is in no way consistent, week to week. Some weeks it's 0, others it's 10. Usually just depends on the effort I put in Is it generally quite easy to spot the difference between the male/female tone? Being active on the forum can definitely increase the likelihood of people messaging. It's getting out there (virtually). Like going to clubs and socials, the more effort you put in, the more likely you'll come across the right people. " Yeah generally the women put more effort into messaging and come across friendlier. With couples, if the man is messaging it often feels more like he's just trying to get something organised with the least amount of effort possible 🤣 And you're right, the forums are an amazing place to get your personality known and increase your reach. | |||
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"I get few messages from women. The ones I do get are often pretty weak. Like: "hi x" "you're cute"..." I will agree with this. For all the shit a lot of women (not all) talk about put effort in to a message, no copy and paste blah blah blah a hell of a lot of them (not all) definitely cant pull it off either. And yes this includes the heavily verified woman (not all) along side the potential men behind fake profiles. | |||
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"I don't get that many. A few handful. Mostly forum related. But no, not many at all. The odd strange message. But mostly just forum related or talking to old friends. " Hey !! I'm not old !! 🤣🤣 | |||
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"Honestly I'm alright just hanging around, tips on painting Warhammer would be welcomed..." Probably not coming from women though. | |||
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"Most ladies who message me are fab buddies so it’s general how’s things type chat.😁 Occasionally I get messages from forum threads saying one of my posts has made them laugh or similar. This makes me happy. On rare occasions I get messages telling me they like one of my pics and I should use it as my profile pic. This also make me happy. What would I like to get? Maybe the odd flirty one, even if it just said “ hey Stanners for what it’s worth I don’t think you’re a knob, and if I’d had 7 cocktails I might just shag you”" Hey Stanners don't knock yourself I would after 5 cocktails  | |||
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"What women can send messages too I assumed only men can send them Ha, they do. And can. I think. Yeah, course they do. If the profile is one they want to. Such demanding creatures, women.
Well that kind of fucks my self esteem lol"Noooo. Sorry about that! Should probably have given the thread a few more seconds thought before posting it ha. | |||
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"Most ladies who message me are fab buddies so it’s general how’s things type chat.😁 Occasionally I get messages from forum threads saying one of my posts has made them laugh or similar. This makes me happy. On rare occasions I get messages telling me they like one of my pics and I should use it as my profile pic. This also make me happy. What would I like to get? Maybe the odd flirty one, even if it just said “ hey Stanners for what it’s worth I don’t think you’re a knob, and if I’d had 7 cocktails I might just shag you” Hey Stanners don't knock yourself I would after 5 cocktails "I’m in 😘 | |||
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"What women can send messages too I assumed only men can send them Ha, they do. And can. I think. Yeah, course they do. If the profile is one they want to. Such demanding creatures, women.
Well that kind of fucks my self esteem lol
Noooo. Sorry about that! Should probably have given the thread a few more seconds thought before posting it ha."I'm sure I can cope lol | |||
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"What women can send messages too I assumed only men can send them Ha, they do. And can. I think. Yeah, course they do. If the profile is one they want to. Such demanding creatures, women.
Well that kind of fucks my self esteem lol
Noooo. Sorry about that! Should probably have given the thread a few more seconds thought before posting it ha.
I'm sure I can cope lol"Well some of us love you Bulldog. FAF? 🤣🤣 Oh sorry, wrong thread 🤣 | |||
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"What's the general standard of messages you receive from women like? that." Entertaining. "Do you get many messages in a day/month/year?that." Of 22 people who have messaged me, 8 are from woman - three of whom are friends (so we banter), the other five tend to be responses to comments in the Forum. One couple have messaged me, but that is only to tell me to take a seat on the naughty step - they never follow up with a spanking, the teases. "What kind of message *would* you like to get?" Flirting would be nice, but it would probably go over my head. I think one of the messages from a woman was flirting, but I may have not realised and responded in my usual flippant manner. One last week was the equivalent of FAF (she has messaged in the past in one of my earlier incarnations on Fab), unfortunately it wasn't convenient, whereas this weekend I might have taken her up on it. It is actually nice just seeing a yellow envelope appear. | |||
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"I don't recieve many messages but it doesn't bother me. The general standard from women is what would categorise as decent. Nothing abhorrent such as those from men, like the other thread has unearthed. Any messages usually come off the back of the forums so there's an already established common ground and they're well written, sometimes flirty, sometimes funny - all in all decent. " Do you think the lack of "abhorrence" might be down to it stemming from the back of forum threads? They're not messaging you blind, so to speak (type) " I like messages which are direct (because I'm "sign blind") and have a question or something obvious I can reply to to get things going. " Yep, makes sense. Having to reply to a stale message is difficult. Questions are good (depending). | |||
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"I don't get that many. A few handful. Mostly forum related. But no, not many at all. The odd strange message. But mostly just forum related or talking to old friends. " Would you like to get more or are you not fussed? | |||
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"I get few messages from women. The ones I do get are often pretty weak. Like: "hi x" "you're cute"... On the rare occasion I get an actual message from a woman I'm instantly worried it's actually a man 😭" I have zero doubt that women can send dull messages. Zero. Maybe they think more isn't needed because they own a vagina/gender imbalance. | |||
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Occasionally I receive ones from ladies and they’re just normal conversation to either start a conversation or continue one… i never get ‘Fuck now!!’ And a pair of tits… closely followed by another message of ?????????? And then another saying im a fat unfuckable pig… then blocked. Which I suspect is the difference with women and messaging xx | |||
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"What's the general standard of messages you receive from women like? Do you get many messages in a day/month/year? What kind of message *would* you like to get? *It became three. Sorry about that." Most of the ones I receive are flirty or trying to get to know me. Most days it's zero messages from new people that I'm not already chatting to and not related to threads, plus the odd bloke wanting me to pound them. But one day I got about 10 messages from different women/couples that were of the initiate contact sort, that was a bit overwhelming, I'm not great at multitasking. I like flirty messages and ones where we are getting to know each other and finding out what things we like to do, and that's not just sexy stuff. | |||
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"I don't get that many. A few handful. Mostly forum related. But no, not many at all. The odd strange message. But mostly just forum related or talking to old friends. Would you like to get more or are you not fussed?" Sometimes I think I would like getting more. But I know the number of messages ladies on here get is horrific. So other times, I'm glad I don't get bombarded. If that makes sense? Conflicted I know. | |||
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"What's the general standard of messages you receive from women like? Do you get many messages in a day/month/year? What kind of message *would* you like to get? *It became three. Sorry about that. Don't know haha. Nah. Honestly I'm alright just hanging around, tips on painting Warhammer would be welcomed..." If a woman messaged me with unsolicited 40K or blood bowl pics I would be putty in their hands. | |||
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"Do you mean they message me first? Incredibly rare. And usually it's about something happening on the forums, a challenge or a discussion and they want to have a private convo about it. I'm happy to have a chat. " Yep, them messaging you first. Could be a new person, someone you've not spoken to for awhile. Women proactively messaging. "I don't think I've received any overly sexual messages from a lady. Maybe a bit of flirting after we've had a chat on the forums. No random tit pics or vag pics (is that a thing?) " Not that I know of. I send a friend random tit pics but I don't think it's commonplace. Maybe you should start a campaign for it to be? Men deserve unsolicited nudes too. 🩷 "I think the emphasis is still on the men to approach women. " Yep,that's whant I was thinking about when I started the thread. Strong agree with that. 😊 "I would love to have a decent conversation with a lady, maybe about a shared interest or something they like about me. Or some shameless flirting. Or telling me if they are actually into me because I genuinely don't know. I'd love to have a social. Face to face is better. Tell me something about herself that most people don't know. And also silly stuff. Just be yourself. There's more to life than tits but it's a great place to start 😜👍🏾" Shared interests are a great starting place, I hope you find that Shams. You're a genuinely lovely man. 😘 | |||
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"As near as makes no difference, zero. But that’s ok, it’s to be expected. The messages I did get which eventually led to meets were unsolicited. And generally well written and thoughtful. " That's a really positive take on it, being a single male on here could potentially be a bit disheartening. I think most of the time if a woman (a real woman) was messaging it's because they're genuinely interested, rather than a more scattergun approach (there will be women who do that). | |||
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"What would I like to get? Maybe the odd flirty one, even if it just said “ hey Stanners for what it’s worth I don’t think you’re a knob, and if I’d had 7 cocktails I might just shag you”" Set the bar a bit higher, Stanners, come on now. 4 cocktails max. Don't do yourself a disservice like that. 🩷 | |||
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"They are usually interesting, friendly and not at all saucy. I’m keen to get an ‘in-ya-face’ sexualised ‘show us ya cock’ type thing from a lady, but I never do, sort of ‘phwooaaar! Show us your ball sack, ya hunk, your 4 April pic makes me wetter than a mens public urinal floor’ " It's just piss! 😎 | |||
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"Depends what I’ve been doing as to the kind of first message I receive from women. Generally all great, it’s a stark comparison to ones I receive from men 😂 I imagine women’s inboxes fill up like cesspits with terrible messages from guys so they don’t reach out as much, it’s understandable though" Cesspits. 😅 No, men aren't all bad. Most aren't. Filters really help improve an experience. It's interesting you said depends on what you're doing - being active on the forum helps? Have you found any difference in content with different photos displayed? Not sure if that's applicable for men. | |||
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"I get very few messages, but a fortnight ago I got two within a few hours which was a bit of a shock. ....There were a few messages back and forth and we seemed to get along. We progressed to a video call but didn't really click. Suspect me being shy and tired didn't help. ....I see comments about people sending Hi/Hey as an opening message and really don't understand that." It's kind of lazy, testing the waters, not wanting to do more isn't it? Tired can't be helped, if there's no click there isn't one. Hopefully you get another good shock soon. | |||
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"Filth Not many Filth but so something pleasant now and again. Maybe a boob pic or a tease. You know, the usual wank material It was a pleasure to be of service, Meli." Women you've never spoken to send filth? Or is filth from previous filthsters? Thank you Kaisy, really appreciate it. 😘 | |||
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"I'd say it's more the top 10% of guys that will get messages. And the rest of the guys have to try their luck to be seen in the 1000 plus messages that women and couples get on a daily. " Ah that's an interesting theory. Thousand plus might be erring towards exaggeration but hey, it's a theory. | |||
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"One last week was the equivalent of FAF (she has messaged in the past in one of my earlier incarnations on Fab), unfortunately it wasn't convenient, whereas this weekend I might have taken her up on it. It is actually nice just seeing a yellow envelope appear. " You got a FaF message? Oh, you lucky so and so! I've never had one. Well, not that's been taken seriously. Bad news about the timing but there'll be other yellow envelopes with intent, Phooey. 🤞🏼 | |||
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" Occasionally I receive ones from ladies and they’re just normal conversation to either start a conversation or continue one… i never get ‘Fuck now!!’ And a pair of tits… closely followed by another message of ?????????? And then another saying im a fat unfuckable pig… then blocked. Which I suspect is the difference with women and messaging xx " You're sounding almost disappointed there, Todger; if you'd like I could roleplay a clichéd exchange so you know the exhilarating highs and crashing lows of the one sided conversation? 🩷 | |||
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"What's the general standard of messages you receive from women like? Do you get many messages in a day/month/year? What kind of message *would* you like to get? *It became three. Sorry about that." What’s the standard like? They are often short and consisting of ok a lot. 1 a week, if I’m lucky. I’d love to get a hey, what’s up, like the profile or like the pics but I rarely get a message first | |||
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"Filth Not many Filth but so something pleasant now and again. Maybe a boob pic or a tease. You know, the usual wank material It was a pleasure to be of service, Meli. Women you've never spoken to send filth? Or is filth from previous filthsters? Thank you Kaisy, really appreciate it. 😘" Oh, previous filthsters. You know the type. | |||
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"One last week was the equivalent of FAF (she has messaged in the past in one of my earlier incarnations on Fab), unfortunately it wasn't convenient, whereas this weekend I might have taken her up on it. It is actually nice just seeing a yellow envelope appear. You got a FaF message? Oh, you lucky so and so! I've never had one. Well, not that's been taken seriously. Bad news about the timing but there'll be other yellow envelopes with intent, Phooey. 🤞🏼" It started with the innocuous Fancy a meet, followed by Free this weekend and the marvellous Fuck me then! Each sentence starting with an F, and all very direct. | |||
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"Desperation and vaj pics. Maybe a decent recipe for something I haven't cooked yet too." Are these messages you want or receive? Regardless, thanks for bringing your avatar to the thread. 😘 | |||
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"Meli. Nobody took my hint so slip boobs in to my inbox. " No, don't try and option B me. (🤗) | |||
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"What would I like to get? Maybe the odd flirty one, even if it just said “ hey Stanners for what it’s worth I don’t think you’re a knob, and if I’d had 7 cocktails I might just shag you” Set the bar a bit higher, Stanners, come on now. 4 cocktails max. Don't do yourself a disservice like that. 🩷" Thank you 😘 | |||
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"What women can send messages too I assumed only men can send them Ha, they do. And can. I think. Yeah, course they do. If the profile is one they want to. Such demanding creatures, women.
Well that kind of fucks my self esteem lol
Noooo. Sorry about that! Should probably have given the thread a few more seconds thought before posting it ha.
I'm sure I can cope lol
Well some of us love you Bulldog. FAF? 🤣🤣
Oh sorry, wrong thread 🤣"Thank you and you know the answer is always yes yes yes | |||
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"Do you mean they message me first? Incredibly rare. And usually it's about something happening on the forums, a challenge or a discussion and they want to have a private convo about it. I'm happy to have a chat. Yep, them messaging you first. Could be a new person, someone you've not spoken to for awhile. Women proactively messaging. I don't think I've received any overly sexual messages from a lady. Maybe a bit of flirting after we've had a chat on the forums. No random tit pics or vag pics (is that a thing?) Not that I know of. I send a friend random tit pics but I don't think it's commonplace. Maybe you should start a campaign for it to be? Men deserve unsolicited nudes too. 🩷 I think the emphasis is still on the men to approach women. Yep,that's whant I was thinking about when I started the thread. Strong agree with that. 😊 I would love to have a decent conversation with a lady, maybe about a shared interest or something they like about me. Or some shameless flirting. Or telling me if they are actually into me because I genuinely don't know. I'd love to have a social. Face to face is better. Tell me something about herself that most people don't know. And also silly stuff. Just be yourself. There's more to life than tits but it's a great place to start 😜👍🏾 Shared interests are a great starting place, I hope you find that Shams. You're a genuinely lovely man. 😘" Thank you very much. I think you're a lovely lady. Your recent profile pictures have been eye catching. Your voice melts me. 😘 | |||
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"What's the general standard of messages you receive from women like? " Variable… most are saying something funny and intelligent about a forum post or something on my profile. Occasionally I’ll get one from someone who insists I’m married, whereas the real reason I won’t meet her is because she’s horrible. "Do you get many messages in a day/month/year?" A few a year. "What kind of message *would* you like to get?" Something that sparks a conversation where she makes me laugh, or think more about a topic. Or sends me boob pics, natch. | |||
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"What's the general standard of messages you receive from women like? Do you get many messages in a day/month/year? What kind of message *would* you like to get? *It became three. Sorry about that." Never get any first messages | |||
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"What's the general standard of messages you receive from women like? Do you get many messages in a day/month/year? What kind of message *would* you like to get? *It became three. Sorry about that." Just logged on. Very very very rarely receive a message from a woman that I haven’t winked or sent a message too. Any guys that say they receive 1 or more messages a week from women first are either very lucky, have exceptional profiles or lying 🤥 I don’t think women need to send first messages tbh | |||
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"What's the general standard of messages you receive from women like? Do you get many messages in a day/month/year? What kind of message *would* you like to get? *It became three. Sorry about that. Never get any first messages " You did some years ago when I mailed you. | |||
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"What's the general standard of messages you receive from women like? Do you get many messages in a day/month/year? What kind of message *would* you like to get? *It became three. Sorry about that. Never get any first messages You did some years ago when I mailed you." Ooops ! | |||
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"What's the general standard of messages you receive from women like? Variable… most are saying something funny and intelligent about a forum post or something on my profile. Occasionally I’ll get one from someone who insists I’m married, whereas the real reason I won’t meet her is because she’s horrible. Do you get many messages in a day/month/year? A few a year. What kind of message *would* you like to get? Something that sparks a conversation where she makes me laugh, or think more about a topic. Or sends me boob pics, natch." I haven't heard 'natch' used in quite some time, nice bit of nostalgia going on now | |||
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"What's the general standard of messages you receive from women like? Do you get many messages in a day/month/year? What kind of message *would* you like to get? *It became three. Sorry about that." Don’t get any messages from women always seems to be men asking if I’m free now | |||
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"What's the general standard of messages you receive from women like? Do you get many messages in a day/month/year? What kind of message *would* you like to get? *It became three. Sorry about that." Few and far between would be my honest answer, but generally depends how active i am on the site, participating in the forums etc. Messages from women or couples that I haven't messaged first....rarely. a handful in a year if that. But they are generally of a good standard, they have read my profile and are genuinely interested, ask questions and are engaged. Of course there is the odd "hi" message and one word responses that are frankly boring. What would I like to receive? If they have read my profile, share an interest and are open to expressing their interests / wants / needs , stay engaged in the conversation and dont just disappeared without another word spoken....that would be brilliant! | |||
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"What's the general standard of messages you receive from women like? Do you get many messages in a day/month/year? What kind of message *would* you like to get? *It became three. Sorry about that. Don’t get any messages from women always seems to be men asking if I’m free now " And are you? | |||
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"My monthly message about my subscription running out is the high (ohhhhhh a message at last) ohhhhhh the low (it’s from Admin asking for money)." Haha I feel this one  | |||
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"Outside of forum messages ... 🦗 🦗 (But then my bio sucks more than a glory hole addict and I just have the one pic) The forum messages are top notch 🎯" I like the self awareness, yeah one pic and a poor bio probably won't get you far. Yay for the forums! It's a great way to display personality. | |||
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"Women never message me first, I assume it's because they're all intimidated by my handsomeness. 😁" Let's go with handsomeness intimidation, it's a Sunday. 🩷 | |||
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"I guess I get more messages from women than your average guy on fab, and they mostly just compliment my content / moves / looks...which is always welcomed. Sometimes I do get the odd "Hey" or "Hi" and they just expect me to lead the conversation , which I rarely entertain...or the "I don't usually go for someone below 6', but in your case I'd make an exception "...and these really annoy me, so mostly just ignore. " "I don't usually" is so very grim, yeah, no one could blame you for ignoring that drivel. Women can be quite passive sometimes, can't they? I say this as a woman who ends up taking the lead when dating women. | |||
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"They are usually interesting, friendly and not at all saucy. I’m keen to get an ‘in-ya-face’ sexualised ‘show us ya cock’ type thing from a lady, but I never do, sort of ‘phwooaaar! Show us your ball sack, ya hunk, your 4 April pic makes me wetter than a mens public urinal floor’ " But you deserve the sauce, Steve-o. All the sauce. Do you think you'd respond well to sauciness straight off the bat or are you more likely to think it's a man? | |||
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"I don’t even get a woman’s reply to anything I say on the forums let alone a DM! lol" You're not entitled to a reply. On the forums. In private messages. Or DMs. Quite blunt but it's also sadly(ish) true. If women aren't replying to you in DMs, that's a whole other thread I'm not touching. | |||
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"Women never message me first, I assume it's because they're all intimidated by my handsomeness. 😁 Let's go with handsomeness intimidation, it's a Sunday. 🩷" Thanks. 🫶🏼 | |||
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"I don’t even get a woman’s reply to anything I say on the forums let alone a DM! lol You're not entitled to a reply. On the forums. In private messages. Or DMs. Quite blunt but it's also sadly(ish) true. If women aren't replying to you in DMs, that's a whole other thread I'm not touching. "Straight to the point! Thanks! lol | |||
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"Morning Meli, Genuinely unsolicited messages from women are extremely rare and only from those that are coming across to Guernsey for work, or a break and have read my verifications. Virtually no local ones and if I get one from a profile with no photo, I do instantly suspect it's from a man...the 'tone', as you say, is often different. Happy Sunday "Morning James.
Ah, island living's downside. Yes, getting to Guernsey is a bit different from someone in Manchester talking to a Scouser.
Tone and context yes. Someone earlier posted about it being less friendly, more to the point? When there's a tonal difference that's true. | |||
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But other than that, just a nice introduction, what caught their eye and maybe some mention of my non-sexual interests that I've put on my profile. | |||
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"What's the general standard of messages you receive from women like? Do you get many messages in a day/month/year? What kind of message *would* you like to get? *It became three. Sorry about that." Wait there are men that received messages from women 1st...... This is big news to me | |||
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"Genuinely I only get messages off the back of specific forum threads but it’s always been like that. The very rare occasions where a woman has messaged me first I end up being suspicious as they usually come across the same way as men messaging me. What would I like? Something more than ‘Hi, wuu2’ would be great." I am also shocked at hearing this!…lol | |||
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"For me I get one message a month. I do try and stand out with my messages which is pretty difficult for a guy who stands above the crowd anyway. However I do understand there's obviously a huge ratio between men and women on here" There's a huge ratio. Attitudes and beliefs towards who messages first. And there has to be actual interest in a person's bio. Personally speaking, if I read someone's bio and I'm not interested in talking to them, I don't. Quite a few things in order to get a message, whereas with some women owning a vagina is enough. | |||
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"1 - What's the general standard of messages you receive from women like? 2 - Do you get many messages in a day/month/year? 3 - What kind of message *would* you like to get?" 1 - I did actually get a message from a woman this month, and we're chatting, so that's a turn up for the books! Her first message was a lovely response to something I posted in the forums. It's a rarity though. 2 - overwhelming majority of my unsolicited messages come from over-eager fellas who haven't read my profile, and are of the standard you'd expect 🫣 3 - like most fellas a short genuine message from any woman is going to spark my interest, particularly if she drops in some detail from my profile or a forum post that shows we have common interests for some chats. | |||
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"In terms of messages from new people, maybe once a month or every couple of months but there can be people I chatted to daily. Some of the messages aren't great and quickly fizzle out but others can be great for establishing a connection. I think the type of message I like to receive would be one to indicate an active interest in our chat leading to a meet rather than just because they liked my profile and chatting for the sake of it." You get not great messages from women? No, that tracks. Do the women ever expect you to reply to their dull messages? Get annoyed if you don't?
I'm not sure people would know they want to meet you before they've spoken, maybe the liking your profile is a subtle *in* without fafing. | |||
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"Usually it’s nice smile😀..but even though my profile says straight..a lot of messages from guys ?🤯" Filter out men. Don't expect them (all) to read your profile and consider if you're compatible beyond having an orifice for their penis. Simple life. 😊 | |||
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"Just logged on. Very very very rarely receive a message from a woman that I haven’t winked or sent a message too. Any guys that say they receive 1 or more messages a week from women first are either very lucky, have exceptional profiles or lying 🤥 I don’t think women need to send first messages tbh " They don't need to but it's also good when women do. Because they're choosing to. Actively choosing to message. I don't know if it's luck. Or exceptional profiles. Or lying. Maybe a fairly decent profile helps - a few photos and a sentence or two compared to someone who has taken the time and effort to build theirs - yeah, I can guess who would receive more messages. There's also age, looks, marital status (some women won't meet those who are cheating), lots of others things at play. | |||
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"What women can send messages too I assumed only men can send them " Ive sent quite a few as the first message, had one reply i think So it goes both ways tbh | |||
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"1 - I did actually get a message from a woman this month, and we're chatting, so that's a turn up for the books! Her first message was a lovely response to something I posted in the forums. It's a rarity though. " Yaaay! What a turn up. I think the forums can be an easy way to start interacting with someone. Less pressure in a way. "2 - overwhelming majority of my unsolicited messages come from over-eager fellas who haven't read my profile, and are of the standard you'd expect 🫣" Yeaaah... nuff said. "3 - like most fellas a short genuine message from any woman is going to spark my interest, particularly if she drops in some detail from my profile or a forum post that shows we have common interests for some chats." If a woman messaged you straight off the bat with something sexual would you still reply? | |||
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"Generally, Short responses from most. Similar to others I get more if I'm active in the forums, although putting up regular status updates has helped and led to a lovely woman messaging me. Although paranoid I'm at the bottom of a mass of messages now :/" Don't overthink it, that way madness lies. I hope the status updates keep leading to positive interactions. 😊 | |||
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"I was actually thinking would this site be any better if men see banned from emailing first? The women and couples have to make the first move, we can only wink to initiate? Probably cut down the flooding of womens emails." Ah, Bumbleesque? I don't think so; there'd be a lot of winkers wondering why they're not getting messages and then getting frustrated/angry when they don't. It won't improve the gender imbalance. Nor will it create the cultural shift where the onus is on the woman to be pro rather than re active. Maybe it would be a more pleasant experience for women and couples but can you imagine the forums? The threads started? They'd be far less enjoyable. | |||
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"What's the general standard of messages you receive from women like? Short, to the point, cagey, untrusting, sporadic, difficult to keep a conversation flowing with? The ubiquitous “Lol x” is a conversation killer… Do you get many messages in a day/month/year? No, I live in a Fab-desolate area, so few opportunities for me here. What kind of message *would* you like to get? After 14 years of using Fab, I would be gobsmacked if a woman messaged me first… *It became three. Sorry about that." | |||
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"I was actually thinking would this site be any better if men see banned from emailing first? The women and couples have to make the first move, we can only wink to initiate? Probably cut down the flooding of womens emails. Ah, Bumbleesque? I don't think so; there'd be a lot of winkers wondering why they're not getting messages and then getting frustrated/angry when they don't. It won't improve the gender imbalance. Nor will it create the cultural shift where the onus is on the woman to be pro rather than re active. Maybe it would be a more pleasant experience for women and couples but can you imagine the forums? The threads started? They'd be far less enjoyable." The threads could be fixed in a way you can filter out what you don’t want to see I am thinking. I get there are options to block emails already but I feel sorry for new joiners who insatndy have over 100 emails within a couple of hours of joining | |||
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"Just logged on. Very very very rarely receive a message from a woman that I haven’t winked or sent a message too. Any guys that say they receive 1 or more messages a week from women first are either very lucky, have exceptional profiles or lying 🤥 I don’t think women need to send first messages tbh They don't need to but it's also good when women do. Because they're choosing to. Actively choosing to message. I don't know if it's luck. Or exceptional profiles. Or lying. Maybe a fairly decent profile helps - a few photos and a sentence or two compared to someone who has taken the time and effort to build theirs - yeah, I can guess who would receive more messages. There's also age, looks, marital status (some women won't meet those who are cheating), lots of others things at play. " I have a decent profile, tasteful pics and interact on the forums so 🤷🏻♂️ | |||
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"I have a decent profile, tasteful pics and interact on the forums so 🤷🏻♂️" Apologies, it wasn't directed at you personally, more the idea of luck and "exceptional" profiles being needed. Oh and men lying about the amount of messages. | |||
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"The threads could be fixed in a way you can filter out what you don’t want to see I am thinking. I get there are options to block emails already but I feel sorry for new joiners who insatndy have over 100 emails within a couple of hours of joining " Filters should be opt out, rather than in, yeah that could make a difference. | |||
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"I have a decent profile, tasteful pics and interact on the forums so 🤷🏻♂️ Apologies, it wasn't directed at you personally, more the idea of luck and "exceptional" profiles being needed. Oh and men lying about the amount of messages. " No offence taken at all. My point was that I tick all the boxes but wouldn’t receive messages first. I’m not complaining, just stating a fact. I do believe part of it is luck or just timing x | |||
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"Generally, Short responses from most. Similar to others I get more if I'm active in the forums, although putting up regular status updates has helped and led to a lovely woman messaging me. Although paranoid I'm at the bottom of a mass of messages now :/ Don't overthink it, that way madness lies. I hope the status updates keep leading to positive interactions. 😊" Thank you just hear stories about women receiving thousands of messages etc | |||
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"I messaged first on a Male profile yesterday, complimented his profile. We had a lovely chat. Then he’s disappeared 😭 this is why I as a woman don’t usually make the first move… 💔" This makes me go 😫 | |||
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"I messaged first on a Male profile yesterday, complimented his profile. We had a lovely chat. Then he’s disappeared 😭 this is why I as a woman don’t usually make the first move… 💔" Ah. As a woman I would still make the first move. One person leaves the site. Doesn't reply etc. Life goes on. If men were to not make a first move after one person not responding in a way they'd hope... it would all fall down pretty quickly. Finding ways to handle disappointment can help. I do get that we all process, handle things differently but you're potentially missing out on something because one man decided the site wasn't for him. 🤗 | |||
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