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Ghosting 👻👻
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We did it to our very first social meet on here. Made the mistake of exchanging tele details before meeting up for a drink. He knew we had another social the weekend after and continuously tried calling us throughout the whole evening, and sending texts asking if he was still in with a chance! Oh and he looked at least 15 years older than his fab age too.
I think this ghosting was deserved  |
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By *Effy-Woman 1 week ago
Scotland |
I have, kind of. And yes I felt bad, but the stuff I had going on in my life at that time meant more. I have since apologised and thankfully the ghostee was understanding enough to still want to meet me. |
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By *inkShyWoman 1 week ago
near Windsor |
I don't think I've done it. But sometimes ADHD brain means I forget to reply to people and they may slip down the inbox. In real life, people know I will come back to reality in a 5- 6 business days/weeks/months.
Ex ghosted me when I was 24. Didn't feel great after 5 years 🤣 |
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Someone told me on here ghosting only counts if you’ve met face to face. But it’s also sad if you’ve been chatting for weeks and weeks then poof - gone.
I’d always rather be upfront with people if I’ve changed my mind/life stuff gets in the way and I need to stop talking.
A guy I dated did it to me at 19, it was shit then too. I prefer feeling of closure. |
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Ive done it with good reason if someone's been a bit of a knob.
And had it done to me a couple of times when was supposed to meet up but I won't chase anything,if they don't respond I won't bother again type of thing. |
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"Haven't experienced it yet, either way
Thats good  "
Oh no wait there was this one lady. Was just a few fab messages though so not sure if it counts.
Chats were well in-depth, like multiple paragraphs. One day it went cold, I felt they were worth a double message, read with no response so I left it. Days later came a new veri 💔 |
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"Done it, had it done!
Do you think its an "ok" thing to do? Did you feel bad after in both scenarios? Or more so when it happened to you?"
Bad both times but it's just part of life. If someone is constantly contacting you when you don't want it, it needs to be done. And if someone doesn't want me contacting them that's fine. I'd never try to get around it. |
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"Someone told me on here ghosting only counts if you’ve met face to face. But it’s also sad if you’ve been chatting for weeks and weeks then poof - gone.
I’d always rather be upfront with people if I’ve changed my mind/life stuff gets in the way and I need to stop talking.
A guy I dated did it to me at 19, it was shit then too. I prefer feeling of closure. "
I would disagree with that tbh i think messaging counts especially if its been long term and with the intention to meet. It refers to dissapearing with no explanation wether youve seen someone face to face or intended to is irrelevant.
I feel that probably makes whoever told you it feel better or excuse some of there behaviours. Again i could be wrong. I often am |
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By *Effy-Woman 1 week ago
Scotland |
"Someone told me on here ghosting only counts if you’ve met face to face. But it’s also sad if you’ve been chatting for weeks and weeks then poof - gone.
I’d always rather be upfront with people if I’ve changed my mind/life stuff gets in the way and I need to stop talking.
A guy I dated did it to me at 19, it was shit then too. I prefer feeling of closure. "
On here I would consider ghosting to be, arranging to meet up then disappearing. It's a bit shitty if you have been messaging back and forward for a while then radio silence, but that happens all the time. |
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"I don't think I've done it. But sometimes ADHD brain means I forget to reply to people and they may slip down the inbox. In real life, people know I will come back to reality in a 5- 6 business days/weeks/months.
Ex ghosted me when I was 24. Didn't feel great after 5 years 🤣 "
We need a neurospicy group so we understand each other. |
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"Someone told me on here ghosting only counts if you’ve met face to face. But it’s also sad if you’ve been chatting for weeks and weeks then poof - gone.
I’d always rather be upfront with people if I’ve changed my mind/life stuff gets in the way and I need to stop talking.
A guy I dated did it to me at 19, it was shit then too. I prefer feeling of closure.
On here I would consider ghosting to be, arranging to meet up then disappearing. It's a bit shitty if you have been messaging back and forward for a while then radio silence, but that happens all the time. "
Yeah i agree it does happen. Its even worse when said person comes back under a new alias and doesnt even aclnowledge you 🤣🙈 |
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We’ve been ghosted twice, we’ve been asked for a second chance by one of them which we’ve declined.
Rather than ghost we told a couple we couldn’t meet and it we only due to coming on 3 / 4 days early and we got a load of abuse for it.
It’s a no win situation sometimes here |
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"We’ve been ghosted twice, we’ve been asked for a second chance by one of them which we’ve declined.
Rather than ghost we told a couple we couldn’t meet and it we only due to coming on 3 / 4 days early and we got a load of abuse for it.
It’s a no win situation sometimes here "
Yeah im not here to say if its wrong or right noone knows what goes on in peoples lives and everyone has the right to not communicate with who they want i guess
I just wondered how people feel about it both ways as in do they feel shitty about it or can just shake it off as oh well. |
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Do they have to have blocked you for it to be a real ghosting?
Or does it count if they put months of graft into trying to meet you, thousand of messages, photos, voice notes etc daily, only to stop messaging a couple of days after meeting.
If so, yeah. That made me feel like complete shit and knocked my confidence massively. |
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By *Effy-Woman 1 week ago
Scotland |
"Someone told me on here ghosting only counts if you’ve met face to face. But it’s also sad if you’ve been chatting for weeks and weeks then poof - gone.
I’d always rather be upfront with people if I’ve changed my mind/life stuff gets in the way and I need to stop talking.
A guy I dated did it to me at 19, it was shit then too. I prefer feeling of closure.
On here I would consider ghosting to be, arranging to meet up then disappearing. It's a bit shitty if you have been messaging back and forward for a while then radio silence, but that happens all the time.
Yeah i agree it does happen. Its even worse when said person comes back under a new alias and doesnt even aclnowledge you 🤣🙈"
It doesn't feel great, I know. If that happens I just assume I've done something that's put them off and try not to read too much into it. |
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Been ghosted many times, sometimes I feel like I know why but most of the time they just vanish mid conversation and I will never know why.
I have also ghosted yes for various reasons, became really obsessive, 15 texts in a row during times I can’t even reply. When they go from very chatty and interested to just one word answers or a single emoji as a reply.
I don’t feel bad ghosting, I feel far worse telling someone that it won’t work out, especially if they like me |
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"Do they have to have blocked you for it to be a real ghosting?
Or does it count if they put months of graft into trying to meet you, thousand of messages, photos, voice notes etc daily, only to stop messaging a couple of days after meeting.
If so, yeah. That made me feel like complete shit and knocked my confidence massively. "
I would define that as ghosting yes. And im not suprised that sounds awful |
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"I don't consider it ghosting unless we've arranged a meet. Up until that point if conservation drops off that's just what it is xx
But if we've arranged a meet I wouldn't ghost. "
Oh yeah i agree i think its the leading up to a meet. |
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"Do they have to have blocked you for it to be a real ghosting?
Or does it count if they put months of graft into trying to meet you, thousand of messages, photos, voice notes etc daily, only to stop messaging a couple of days after meeting.
If so, yeah. That made me feel like complete shit and knocked my confidence massively.
I would define that as ghosting yes. And im not suprised that sounds awful"
It was awful. Left me with fab trust issues for sure |
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"Do they have to have blocked you for it to be a real ghosting?
Or does it count if they put months of graft into trying to meet you, thousand of messages, photos, voice notes etc daily, only to stop messaging a couple of days after meeting.
If so, yeah. That made me feel like complete shit and knocked my confidence massively.
I would define that as ghosting yes. And im not suprised that sounds awful
It was awful. Left me with fab trust issues for sure "
I think some people are all about the chase and the end goal. I think it says a lot more about them than it does you especially if they didnt make that clear beforehand. |
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I have done it as the lovely lady turn out to be not so lovely. Ended up snapping my SIM card and deleting FB for good. Been done to me by a girl I met in Ibiza many years ago we said we’d meet back up once home she stopped replying after a while Lool |
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I agree, I feel it's still ghosting if you haven't yet met someone but you've been talking loads and have been planning on meeting up/swapped details and then they disappear or just stop responding. I've had this happen to me a fair bit recently tbh, and it does feel quite shit. Breadcrumbing is another, where they seem to ghost then pop back up a few months later to dangle a carrot and keep you on the hook then disappear again.
I try not to ghost people, sometimes conversations just fizzle out and that's fair and understandable. I don't consider that ghosting. The only time I tend to ghost someone now is if I have a reason to be worried about their reaction if I rejected them or they make me feel uncomfortable, so I will just block them to protect myself really.
I try and be honest with people and explain why I probably won't see them again (or no longer want to meet) in most cases, we are all adults and should be able to talk to eachother honestly and openly.
If someone is no longer interested in meeting me I'd rather they just be honest and tell me so I can move on instead of leaving me in limbo and overthinking it. |
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"Someone told me on here ghosting only counts if you’ve met face to face. But it’s also sad if you’ve been chatting for weeks and weeks then poof - gone.
I’d always rather be upfront with people if I’ve changed my mind/life stuff gets in the way and I need to stop talking.
A guy I dated did it to me at 19, it was shit then too. I prefer feeling of closure.
On here I would consider ghosting to be, arranging to meet up then disappearing. It's a bit shitty if you have been messaging back and forward for a while then radio silence, but that happens all the time.
Yeah i agree it does happen. Its even worse when said person comes back under a new alias and doesnt even aclnowledge you 🤣🙈"
Had this also and when they use the same pics and try message you again  |
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I only class it as ghosting if I know the person, conversations with strangers don't count in my eyes. I've never ghosted people I've had some sort of relationship with, I always be honest and communicate it like adults.
Those who disappear and resurface whenever they feel like it though? I feel no way about not answering their message which may be a form of ghosting but they made their bed. |
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Years ago a bloke ghosted me, we'd met a free times. He just stood me up, no word from him untill days after.
He said he'd left his phone at work?! Yeah right he'd used fab that same day. Block.
I haven't really ghosted, more just blocked people when they got too pushy or said something I didn't like. Not those I've met in RL though, just here.
I've sort of ghosted a friend, in real life, when it got to the point of me having to do all the messaging first. |
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I've been ghosted and done it to others. If I don't think we're going to be in each other's lives, there's no point maintaining contact. If they are negative or are having a bad influence on me, I cut them off. It's ok to limit access to people you don't think should have it. I don't feel guilty. When it happens to me, I understand the rules. It's their choice. |
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Yes, once, I had stuff that I was dealing with in my life and wasn't in the right headspace to be starting any sort of relationship. I felt very bad about it, should have done things differently but wasn't thinking straight.
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By *inkShyWoman 1 week ago
near Windsor |
"I don't think I've done it. But sometimes ADHD brain means I forget to reply to people and they may slip down the inbox. In real life, people know I will come back to reality in a 5- 6 business days/weeks/months.
Ex ghosted me when I was 24. Didn't feel great after 5 years 🤣
We need a neurospicy group so we understand each other. "
We do! My friends understand I go MIA and will return eventually after I've finished whatever obsession has taken over my life. |
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I've never had it done to me as far as I know but I've done it twice with no regrets.
One was fab related and the other not but my reasons were similar on both occasions.
They were both manipulative and completely obsessed with what others were doing.
They were quick to accuse others of doing the very things they were guilty of and in both cases when I disagreed with them or tried to tell them that they were in the wrong I became their main target.
I physically walked away from one and ignored all attempts by her to engage me in conversation especially when that quickly turned to threats.
I virtually walked away from the fab related one because I wanted nothing to do with the drama or the manipulation. |
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By *arand25Couple 1 week ago
Crowborough |
We had that last weekend, it sucks big time. A guy was very keen for an MFM with us, S got very excited & we all messaged a great deal leading up to the day.
Two days before the meet he went quiet, read our messages but no reply. Didn't show up of course then when we checked his profile he'd blocked us.
Timewasting prick, I hope he reads this & knows what a turd we think he is. |
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I don't think I've been actively ghosted or ghosted anyone. In the real world, friendships fizzle out but I don't think I've ever made the conscious decision to stop replying to someone.
On here, messages come and go - with some people you know that doesn't matter as it works for you both.
If I like someone, I'll often drop them a random message - off the back of a thread for example - even if they hadn't messaged me in a while, but maybe I'm misjudging them wanting to ghost me! 😰 |
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Never been “ghosted” from a meet perspective, nor have I ever ghosted anyone in the same way. Have had chats initiated by me & by others where they’ve fizzled out as the other person/couple just stopped responding 🤷🏾♂️
Now being in a place of abundance, such things happening don’t phase me anymore |
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Yeah I can think of at least once where I'd been talking to one person loads and then someone important reappeared in my life and I never told the first person why my messaged stopped. I do feel bad. Even though it happened years ago. Jacob, if you ever read this, you deserved better than me.
I was in a long-term long-distance relationship with someone, and mid-conversation he ghosted me. I legit thought he died and mourned him as though he had. By this time, we'd known each other for years too! |
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Ah, actually, I have been ghosted...
Was chatting to someone for ages. We arranged to meet at a group social. Few days before the social (which involved quite a lot of travel for me), she went AWOL. Nada. That did sting as you are left wondering what you did. I think it's odd that adults can't say they're not into someone.
I still want and had a good time - she turned up with a bloke she'd been seeing and barely said hello. Explained the ghosting, I guess. 🤣
She pitched back on here a few months ago and slid into my DMs...easy delete. |
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"Whats your definition og ghosting op"
I suppose my definition is someone who just dissapears without a trace stops talking im not meaning after one or two messages. Im meaning after a long time, building a connection agreeing to meet etc. However i am aware other peoples definitions are different |
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By *iver78Man 1 week ago
barton upon humber |
Only done it once , and tbh I should of just blocked then, but they were very full on and bombarded me with calls texts
Iv been ghosted before , especially of women on here , I don't blame them , I'm pretty boring haha |
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Yes I've had it done to me after meeting someone several times and people I've messaged and meeting has been discussed.
I'll hold my hands up and say the past year I have unintentionally been guilty of it, life has just not given me the mental capacity to remember to message, or I think i have and a week or two later I realise I havent 🫣 so apologies to anyone I may have made feel like I did. |
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No i dont think ive been ghosted.Messages can fizzle out.
I kind of ghost people when i just dissapear and dont say anything. But they know I always come back. Their used to it now
Ive never arranged to meet someone and not turn up and ive never had it done to me thankfully |
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By *oxy-RedWoman 1 week ago
pink panther territory |
Had it done ,he connected me later we sorted it and he's done it again
No going back this time,I honestly don't know why people can't just say sorry I'm not interested anymore we are supposed to be adults |
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I have been. They abruptly cut off contact with me - I assume cos i could not give the level of commitment they wanted (may be completely wrong) - they blocked me on Fab, watsapp and phone, but would then unblock long enough to send a message and then block me again, so I could not discuss what the issue was. It is the reason I left Fab in 2024, no idea if she is still on here. |
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"We had that last weekend, it sucks big time. A guy was very keen for an MFM with us, S got very excited & we all messaged a great deal leading up to the day.
Two days before the meet he went quiet, read our messages but no reply. Didn't show up of course then when we checked his profile he'd blocked us.
Timewasting prick, I hope he reads this & knows what a turd we think he is."
I can imagine it sucks, but I think it's much worse if they do it after you've done the deed! Dodged a bullet! |
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Have you done to me after chatting to the lady for awhile and then arranging the meet we will travel to her area and book some accommodation and then radio silence
I've never done it myself. I never contemplated it. I'll be upfront and honest if they are not for me. |
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"
I can imagine it sucks, but I think it's much worse if they do it after you've done the deed! Dodged a bullet!"
Is that not the etiquette? I thought that everyone ghosted/blocked those with whom they had partaken of 'The Sex' with? I understood that was a requirement of admission to the clique (apprentice level) |
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I’ve had long breaks in conversations. That’s just my brain space and is never meant as ghosting. Daily or even weekly conversation is what happens on this site for me and if that’s you, reading this, chances are I still enjoy our intermittent chat 🫣❤️
Actual ghosting? I don’t think I’ve done a full ghost although I’ve matched energy and noticed the conversation fizzle.
I’ve been properly ghosted on one of my couples accounts. Multiple daily messages and lots of excitement over the course of a couple of months and then one day the conversation was deleted on another platform and the profile gone from here with no explanation. That hurt 🤷♀️ |
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"
I can imagine it sucks, but I think it's much worse if they do it after you've done the deed! Dodged a bullet!
Is that not the etiquette? I thought that everyone ghosted/blocked those with whom they had partaken of 'The Sex' with? I understood that was a requirement of admission to the clique (apprentice level) "
I missed that memo 🤣🤣 |
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I've always looked at ghosting as people who have arranged to meet, then blocked at the last minute - or those that do it after the event.
We've had quite a few fab friends who we've spent months chatting to, and all of a sudden they have evaporated and come to a stop. I know I've unintentionally been guilty of that, as have they, but there was no talk of actually meeting. It doesn't bother me..people move on. |
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Call me Derek Acorah because the ghosts love me 😅
Tbh i’d much rather just get ghosted than all the breadcrumbing / slow fading nonsense where you suddenly get one message every 3-5 business days after consistent communication- and they think you won’t lose interest after a day of it |
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"Call me Derek Acorah because the ghosts love me 😅
Tbh i’d much rather just get ghosted than all the breadcrumbing / slow fading nonsense where you suddenly get one message every 3-5 business days after consistent communication- and they think you won’t lose interest after a day of it "
I think they hope we lose interest once they've got what they set out for. Must make them feel less of a wanker  |
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By *arierWoman 1 week ago
birmingham |
Had it done to me, doesn’t phase me in the slightest. I’m married at the end of the day, I wouldn’t allow it to get to the point I develop feelings for it to cause me upset.
I have done it to other people too. If they make me feel uncomfortable in any way or they’re rude. I don’t feel the need to explain myself to people like that. |
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If you are talking about meets then I have never not turned upto a meet without a decent amount of prior warning beforehand (life happens). I have had meets cancel but, again, they have told me before hand and that is fine.
If it is convos on here then many just die a natural death. That’s the way it should be. |
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I've done it to a friend who I'd not bothered to contact and neither had he. Then out of the blue, will you come to his b.day party along with your partner? Nope. We won't know anyone.
Also been ghosted. Once when I sort of knew that the person was not going to turn up at mine. So not really a problem. But before that I was driving to a UK airport. When I got a call. |
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I don't think so, I feel like things have generally fizzled out on both sides rather than full on ignoring each other but in terms of ghosting someone, I've generally told them if an issue has come up or whether I think we've run out course. I won't lie, I probably still talk to them though while pluck up the courage to tell them and things go on longer than they should 😅 |
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By *ingh89Man 1 week ago
Birmingham |
"Have you done it?
Did you feel bad about it afterwards or not care?
Have you also had it done to you and felt a bit meh about it when you were the recipient? "
I have experienced it on the receiving end almost 99% of the time. Was not great to begin with but got used to it. |
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We been messaging a guy who said a day to meet, then changed it, now he not opened our message for over a week but seems to be on a lot. Gone from wants to meet to not replying. Not going to chase it as plenty of others on here x |
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Done it to a guy I hooked up with one time. It was OK in the moment (I spanked him, he liked it, then started on with calling me Master etc which isn't me and pestering messages) but it wasn't a great meet in the grand scheme of things. Made it clear I thought we were after different things but he kept on trying. Blocked in fabs and other PM channels because I felt he had the potential to become overattached. |
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"We been messaging a guy who said a day to meet, then changed it, now he not opened our message for over a week but seems to be on a lot. Gone from wants to meet to not replying. Not going to chase it as plenty of others on here x"
.
Sounds about right had that happen twice in the last week. Yet to experience anything else to be honest |
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Done it in the sense that I stopped messaging as it got weird ha. I had said I didn't like the way he was talking about carton things but he didn't take that on board so I poofed.
I have had it done to me also, I think it's a little different when you've communicated and they've ignored the boundaries etc.
I wouldn't just poof without explaining my issue.
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Here’s my 2 pence
I think personally it comes down to nerves, people sign up to Fab upload their content and then can’t wait to start talking about Hot wives, who’s wanking now, couple seeking couple for hot fun.
But when it comes to the crunch either it’s not a joint effort reciprocated by both parties in the couple or it’s fantasy about to become reality the balls shrink and it’s easier to fade away.
We’ve had it even when we’ve set a date and moved into a group chat - radio silence as the day approached.
Sad times for those people and I think that’s why people get frustrated here
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"Have you done it?
Did you feel bad about it afterwards or not care?
Have you also had it done to you and felt a bit meh about it when you were the recipient? "
I’ve never felt the need to. It’s rude and hurtful. Just be honest to start with. |
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I was ghosted after my first ever solo social meet when we were very new to fab. If did bother me at the time as we had been messaging for a few months and I assumed I’d done something wrong but I’ve learnt that this type of thing just happens sometimes so I don’t think it would bother me (as much) now.
I haven’t intentionally ghosted anyone but sometimes things just fizzle out xx 😘 |
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Conversations can fizzle out and people can get distracted by a new one. That isn't ghosting.
Arranging a date, time and place for a meet then the other party disappears, never to be seen again happens far more often than it should. This even happens when they are well verified profiles.
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"Have you done it?
Did you feel bad about it afterwards or not care?
Have you also had it done to you and felt a bit meh about it when you were the recipient? "
Happened once, dead of winter, made sure to include methods of verifying intentions before socials now |
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