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By *avidNP OP Man 10 hours ago
manchester |
Anyone else ever feel that on these forums they are invisible at times? It can be a lonely place that’s full of people talking. Some threads seem like they are only meant for certain ‘cool people’
What yo ur experience? |
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"Anyone else ever feel that on these forums they are invisible at times? It can be a lonely place that’s full of people talking. Some threads seem like they are only meant for certain ‘cool people’
What yo ur experience? "
You look quite cute actually xx |
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I’m actually finding the forum more diverse at the moment- with many newer forumites posting and starting threads, such as yourself, OP. 
As a friend said over lunch the other day, I have always stayed in the periphery of the forum- never been really included, and there was a time I -really- tried, years ago, when I was new and young(er)  but now I think I actually prefer to be the outsider as I don’t get any drama and I can still benefit from the forum when I am bored haha. |
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I find that as I post during the night, I tend to end most threads I post on 😂 and rarely have conversations with others….but I enjoy reading through, poking my nose in and putting my opinions forward 😬 |
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The forums have always been cliquey. I think people should just do their own thing and stop worrying about what other people think.
In my experience the fact that you don’t get much public attention doesn’t mean that people don’t notice. Just be yourself. |
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Hi OP, I see and hear you.
I pop in and out (which ironically describes my bedtime skills) and try not to take the forums or fab too seriously and have far more time off than on.
Maybe consider what works/ doesn't work for you and see the forum as an extension.
Take care. |
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I just take the approach of posting in threads that interest me and I feel I have something to contribute, some of the forum games that tend to attract the regulars and name checkers but by no means all, and if people notice and engage that's lovely but I don't feel offended if they don't.
I tend to value more wordy interactions anyway. |
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Especially when leading a busy life it’s not always possible to keep in a thread & keep banter going so dropping into forums adding a comment or observation & seeing if likeminded responses & connections happen |
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The only difference I've noticed in my time using the forums is the number of people using them to give a nod and a wink to conversations they are already having in their off-site chat groups.
It just adds to the belief that cliques exist and can often make newbies reluctant to take part and more established members who aren't in on the joke to just roll their eyes. |
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As a single guy it often feels like you have been overlooked in forum threads, especialy the "erson above" type threads.
It happens. I like to think it it not done on purpose and when it blatantly is, i like to feel that it is noticed and others, will think that persons a bit of a twat for doing it.
But in general, the forums are a friendly, welcoming place. Keep at it and one day, one day in the far future, you too, could be part of the clique 😉 |
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I wouldnt give an online forum or random people on the internet the power to make me feel lonely and lost. I randomly comment on threads im interested in or for a chuckle. If someone chats or replies to me i will answer if they dont i have still given myself a chuckle thats how i view it.
Some people will naturally gravitate towards each other like they would in real life doesnt always mean its cliquey however there are some cliques on here.
I dont think there are any "popular" people on here and if someone does think that their "popular" then they need to give there head a shake. |
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By *iver78Man 9 hours ago
barton upon humber |
"Anyone else ever feel that on these forums they are invisible at times? It can be a lonely place that’s full of people talking. Some threads seem like they are only meant for certain ‘cool people’
What yo ur experience? "
If your feeling like this maybe internet forums arnt for you ,
You are correct in the fact that this one is quite clique but wouldent say its the cool people 🤣🤣 not really a cool place is it , let's face it nobody on a sex site could ever class themselfs as cool 😎 in fact it possibly the opposite 🤣
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I take it all with a pinch of salt to be honest. I enjoy interacting on the forums and comment on whatever interests me. Usually just the silly threads and rarely any serious ones.
I dont feel I'm in any of the 'cool people' groups but equally I dont want to be. I dont post here to be popular, just to have fun and join in. I often get passed over but suxh is the way, I dont let it stop me joining in.
Sorry you are feeling invisible though, thats not a nice feeling. You are seen though and are a welcome addition. |
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I don't think you should take too much stock in people you do not know or their opinions of you.
Define what you think are the 'cool people', some people post more then others, some people seem ok and others not so much.
If you are looking to genuinely connect with people then I would advise other ways to do it, if you are in to clubs, there are socials, even meeting people in vanilla activates.
You might connect with people on here but given the distance of people, you are only seeing what they choose to project.
Nobody really knows me on the forums or my live, If I feel a connection with someone then I let that person closer and take it away from forums and fab. That's when true connection begins. |
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"As a single guy it often feels like you have been overlooked in forum threads, especialy the "erson above" type threads.
It happens. I like to think it it not done on purpose and when it blatantly is, i like to feel that it is noticed and others, will think that persons a bit of a twat for doing it.
But in general, the forums are a friendly, welcoming place. Keep at it and one day, one day in the far future, you too, could be part of the clique 😉"
I have mainly found that it's guys who skip posts on those kind of threads. And yes, I think a lot of it is mis-timing. I've done that more times than I care to remember 😅 |
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Forums are in general clique based, the people who deny this often don't realise they are part of the clique, the cool people as you put have put the hours in to be noticed, some don't have to try as hard as others do.
Look at it like walking into a new pub, it takes time to become part of the furniture, before other people say high or chat to you.
Sooner or later though you become familiar enough to others to ask how you are, unless your the dickhead that no one wants to share a drink with.
Mr 🐺 |
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"Forums are in general clique based, the people who deny this often don't realise they are part of the clique, the cool people as you put have put the hours in to be noticed, some don't have to try as hard as others do.
Look at it like walking into a new pub, it takes time to become part of the furniture, before other people say high or chat to you.
Sooner or later though you become familiar enough to others to ask how you are, unless your the dickhead that no one wants to share a drink with.
Mr 🐺 "
First paragraph 100% true Mr. W
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"Forums are in general clique based, the people who deny this often don't realise they are part of the clique, the cool people as you put have put the hours in to be noticed, some don't have to try as hard as others do.
Look at it like walking into a new pub, it takes time to become part of the furniture, before other people say high or chat to you.
Sooner or later though you become familiar enough to others to ask how you are, unless your the dickhead that no one wants to share a drink with.
Mr 🐺 "
Nailed it. And whilst the loud outgoing flamboyant types get noticed and involved quickly. That doesn’t last if they’re dickheada.
Stick around, say hi, get involved, be a decent person.
Trust me I’ve been through it
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Do find on certain threads that the 6 packs and lip fillers do get the most attention and conversation but nah to Their own. If someone is worth speaking to them they will message and not need public attention to feel appreciated |
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I wouldn't read too much into it,just keep getting involved.
I've been on and off here for years and at times some people interact some don't I just get involved anyway.
I think Mr Wolves has it right in what he wrote  |
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"As a single guy it often feels like you have been overlooked in forum threads, especialy the "erson above" type threads.
It happens. I like to think it it not done on purpose and when it blatantly is, i like to feel that it is noticed and others, will think that persons a bit of a twat for doing it.
But in general, the forums are a friendly, welcoming place. Keep at it and one day, one day in the far future, you too, could be part of the clique 😉"
... ah now the person above i just cant type fast enough |
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OP you’re not claiming everyone is bi, you’re not moaning about needing to pay site support to watch people wank over an elbow in cam chat, you’re not asking incessantly if you should have a beard or whether a dick the girth of a Pringles can is enough, and as far as I can tell you’re not tiredly and performatively simping over every woman on here and calling it ‘flirting’.
Frankly you’re just not trying hard enough 🫵
Get with the program. Individuality will not be tolerated.
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It isn't worth worrying what strangers think about you, especially on a forum.
I have the same approach everywhere I go, I might get on with a few people, I might get on with only one or no one at all, I'm not for everybody so I don't worry about it. But the people I do get on with, I'll get on very well with. |
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Not all topics are for all people. I take part in quite a few and rarely get a response. But it doesn't stop me. If I can give someone some helpful information at some point then that's fine with me. |
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Totally agree posted a few times even answered directly and not a murmer. I also agree it appears to be very clicky.
The last time I was on here was the same for a few years then I got the odd reply.
So don’t give up keep posting |
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I don't put that much thought into the forums...if it makes you feel lost and alone, I would take a step back.
I usually drop a comment in then forget about it. It's when a forum topic turns into a conversation between a select number of people (which could be taken to DM's) happen, I find off putting...and when I see it, I just won't interact with that thread. |
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It's difficult to reply to every comment without dominating the thread. And sometimes people only respond if they have something to say. It doesn't mean your comment is overlooked or ignored. Feeling lost or alone is normal. I've felt like that sometimes too. I either take a break or I get stuck in. I hope you're feeling better OP. As a geek, I was never cool. But now being geeky/nerdy is cool. Express yourself 👍🏾😊 |
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By *iver78Man 8 hours ago
barton upon humber |
Simple way to get attention is go against what one of the ' cool ' people say 🤣 works wonders and is quite funny when they get passive aggressive over a text and use really big words in an effort to try to intimidate you with there knowledge of the English language 🤣
But I dont see you (OP) being that way inclined .. and never go against who you are
Is funny though 🤣
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I enjoy being invisible. I like being able to write my own thoughts down, and bugger off 🤣
Being a lurker as well, I have found that new posters who instantly want to gravitate towards the "cool bunch" don't particularly have a better time on here. There's no denying, that comments made daily, are not particularly in favour of some poster's behaviours and would you want to be associated with that?I think concentrate on creating threads that get people interested and talking. Make your own group of people to be cool with. The "cool people" are outnumbered, so you'll have more success and people to talk to, if you concentrate on the ones who don't want to be part on this so called in crowd. |
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By *erdyHollyTV/TS 7 hours ago
In a galaxy far far away |
I wouldn't say people are invisible on the forum, as their comments are still read, even if not replied to.
On a lot of my threads, I'll create a topic and rather than replying to everyone who posts, I prefer to get people talking amongst themselves and I sit back and enjoy reading the replies.
There a lot of threads I avoid, like the smash or pass games, the secret message game, or other matchmaker ones. They can get a bit clique.
But I generally just post random rubbish and try to be funny to make me laugh. I like improv comedy and if I can make a quick joke on a reply it makes me laugh.
If it makes someone else laugh it's a bonus.
But don't take it to heart if your not always replied to, it's not possible to reply to everyone.
The best advice I can give you if you do feel a bit ignored, is to make threads yourself. That's the best way to talk to people on the forum on a subject you like, as you can reply to them, and they reply to you etc |
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I have actually found this forum surprisingly less cliquey than most, as long as you stay in the lounge
During my first couple of months of posting I've had several side pm conversations from members who have messaged me first. Plenty of my comments quoted and replied to.
However, if 3 members say basically the same thing, it's natural for a member to reply to the person they know best, that is not ignoring the other 2 comments, just subconscious human nature.
I would add that, just because your comment hasn't been replied to, doesn't mean that it hasn't added to the quality of debate. So keep contributing.
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