FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > can personality win out over looks......
can personality win out over looks......
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"in the wake of the "ugly" thread... this got me thinking... I wouldn't call myself classically "good looking"... but what I lack in looks I think I so make up for in personality and more.... So what I am asking in how much does someone personality actually make in the decision to play with someone or not.... or is it more a case of looks first.... or is it personal that is the "dealbreaker" between playing or not..... or have there been times when you have been mentally attracted to someone loads... but physically not so much??? seanxxxx" looks for me have always been of paramount importance, if i dont think "phwoooooooooooooar" then it aint happening  | |||
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"See Fabio. Read every response. They all say looks. And yeah people say its personality too or personality even more so than looks... the problem being if there is a girl sat at the table, you have to be good looking to be able to sit next to her and show her your personality... the problem being for ugly guys, they arent allowed to sit next to them. Sure im exagorating but the point is there, if you dont have the looks then you cant sit at the table. Btw Fabio, I dont see swingers as 3rd on the list as you put it, it is equal.. i only found out that a Swingers site existed a month ago ok pal? "The thing is though Matt,it all depends on what you class as good looking in a guy. O.K there are the classical good looks and there are the pretty boy good looks. But some women,Trace is one of them,can also go for unconventional looks. I'm definitely no oil painting but Trace fancies me,even though I've no idea why,I must have caught her at a low ebb,lol. You don't always have to look like Brad Pitt to attract a nice looking partner as I'm sure a lot of guys on here will vouch for. R | |||
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"personality every time looks only get you so far and definitely not into my bed! If you dont have the chat to back it up, what's the point? the person doesnt have to be good looking to have an attraction, you could be attracted to their eyes or smile or laugh....doesnt matter as long as they appeal to you. besides which, who the hell am i to decide what is and isnt good looking? gotta be some perfect beauty to be judging others looks." personal choice? Well you may think someones not so nice and il think theyre "phwwwwwoaaaaaaaaaaaaar" but you are entiled to an opinion surely? | |||
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"i wouldnt say anyone is bad looking...but i wouldnt say anyone is good looking, reason being is that my taste may be completely different to the next chap" but you are still allowed to have an opinion | |||
"i wouldnt say anyone is bad looking...but i wouldnt say anyone is good looking, reason being is that my taste may be completely different to the next chap" Whilst this is true, it's also a little idyllic. There are certainly general society-led perceptions of what is "good" and "bad" looking. It's hard to put into words, or use a description, but to most people walking past person A in the street, you'd get a large % that described them similarly, especially if they were at either end of the spectrum | |||
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"personality every time looks only get you so far and definitely not into my bed! If you dont have the chat to back it up, what's the point? the person doesnt have to be good looking to have an attraction, you could be attracted to their eyes or smile or laugh....doesnt matter as long as they appeal to you. besides which, who the hell am i to decide what is and isnt good looking? gotta be some perfect beauty to be judging others looks.personal choice? Well you may think someones not so nice and il think theyre "phwwwwwoaaaaaaaaaaaaar" but you are entiled to an opinion surely? "I agree, attraction is a personal thing, as i said, attraction could be a smile or a cheeky wink. what i dont agree, is that there is a benchmark for good looking, it will differ from person to person. however, for me, it is the personality that i find myself attracted to. | |||
"Ladeeees and Gentlemen. Welcome to Fabs' "Thread of the Day"!! Early preictions are for 100 posts to be acheivable. Our pundits are expecting some light arguing, but there are no predictions at this time for it "kicking off" and our forecast is a forum ban is, at this stage, unlikely for any members. We'll be monitoring the thread during the day to see how things progress and bringing you regular updates. Don't forget forum fans - it can kick off at any moment, and input from the original poster can often be the key - though we've all see OP's disappear and leave the battlefield to those who want it. Good luck to you all. Let opinionated comment commence..." You'll know it's thread of the day when it's 4:30, which is when the major thread hijackers come on line | |||
"Ladeeees and Gentlemen. Welcome to Fabs' "Thread of the Day"!! Early preictions are for 100 posts to be acheivable. Our pundits are expecting some light arguing, but there are no predictions at this time for it "kicking off" and our forecast is a forum ban is, at this stage, unlikely for any members. We'll be monitoring the thread during the day to see how things progress and bringing you regular updates. Don't forget forum fans - it can kick off at any moment, and input from the original poster can often be the key - though we've all see OP's disappear and leave the battlefield to those who want it. Good luck to you all. Let opinionated comment commence... You'll know it's thread of the day when it's 4:30, which is when the major thread hijackers come on line "In your opinion.  | |||
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" Its a good one ,,, this post as you get some on site like this so far up there own bums. AND then you get some so scared to meet as feel thay may let others down as dont see them selfs very nice ,,, its about fun not all that crap , clicking getting on. " *nods in agreement* | |||
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"See Fabio. Read every response. They all say looks. And yeah people say its personality too or personality even more so than looks... the problem being if there is a girl sat at the table, you have to be good looking to be able to sit next to her and show her your personality... the problem being for ugly guys, they arent allowed to sit next to them. Sure im exagorating but the point is there, if you dont have the looks then you cant sit at the table. Btw Fabio, I dont see swingers as 3rd on the list as you put it, it is equal.. i only found out that a Swingers site existed a month ago ok pal? "You need putting in a bag and shaking up. You appear to be obsessed by your looks. Someone needs to give you a damn good reality check as i said on the previous post about ugly people, there are so many people with severe disabilities and facial disfigurements that have a wonderful happy life. Go out and bloody well start to enjoy yourself. | |||
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"Personality everytime, couldnt go with someone who was gorgeous but a comlete twat. Once i get along with people they become nice looking in my eyes anyway. I will say that there has to be some physical attraction, unfortunatly there are some people that just are not appealing. Lucky for me the guys i know are gorgeous outwardly and inwardly" that is exactly how I am!!! | |||
" looks for me have always been of paramount importance, if i dont think "phwoooooooooooooar" then it aint happening "Ditto to that. She may have a great personality but if she looks like Bella Emberg she ain't getting hold of my John Thomas!! | |||
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" looks for me have always been of paramount importance, if i dont think "phwoooooooooooooar" then it aint happening
Ditto to that. She may have a great personality but if she looks like Bella Emberg she ain't getting hold of my John Thomas!! "you must be drop dead gorgeous to every person on the planet then huh?! | |||
"See Fabio. Read every response. They all say looks. And yeah people say its personality too or personality even more so than looks... the problem being if there is a girl sat at the table, you have to be good looking to be able to sit next to her and show her your personality... the problem being for ugly guys, they arent allowed to sit next to them. Sure im exagorating but the point is there, if you dont have the looks then you cant sit at the table. Btw Fabio, I dont see swingers as 3rd on the list as you put it, it is equal.. i only found out that a Swingers site existed a month ago ok pal?
You need putting in a bag and shaking up. You appear to be obsessed by your looks. Someone needs to give you a damn good reality check as i said on the previous post about ugly people, there are so many people with severe disabilities and facial disfigurements that have a wonderful happy life. Go out and bloody well start to enjoy yourself.
"good call!! i just had an excellent time with a guy who said "a girl like you wouldnt look twice at a guy like me"....i ignored that line as i thought it accused me of being shallow....walked of and he walked over and made some quip about how i at least proved his point...but he had this wicked glint in his eye i couldnt resist. had sooo much fun both in and out of bed. doesnt matter what you look like, if you have the confidence to pull it off you're half way there. though there's a fine line between confident and arrogant. also have a friend who i would say most would consider was incredibly gorgeous looking...thing is, he's terribly shy and a real nice guy so every woman he talks to ends up being a great friend! | |||
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"Ladeeees and Gentlemen. Welcome to Fabs' "Thread of the Day"!! Early preictions are for 100 posts to be acheivable. Our pundits are expecting some light arguing, but there are no predictions at this time for it "kicking off" and our forecast is a forum ban is, at this stage, unlikely for any members. We'll be monitoring the thread during the day to see how things progress and bringing you regular updates. Don't forget forum fans - it can kick off at any moment, and input from the original poster can often be the key - though we've all see OP's disappear and leave the battlefield to those who want it. Good luck to you all. Let opinionated comment commence..." the only opinion I have of you is that you are a cheeky sod!!!! I think i'm actually a lot more measured about what I write now (see, this is what happens when ya count to 10 before typing) I am not a firestarter and I don't take offence to what you put, however I could see how this post could be constued that way bearing in mind we were talking about "hijacks" in other threads 
back to topic....
I don't see me as "good looking"... I don't think people tend to see it in themselves, however when I am on meets or in clubs I do think to myself "why have they picked me?"
In a way I think I have a lot more confidence now then I did when I started, and I think that does show in my personality...
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"Ladeeees and Gentlemen. Welcome to Fabs' "Thread of the Day"!! Early preictions are for 100 posts to be acheivable. Our pundits are expecting some light arguing, but there are no predictions at this time for it "kicking off" and our forecast is a forum ban is, at this stage, unlikely for any members. We'll be monitoring the thread during the day to see how things progress and bringing you regular updates. Don't forget forum fans - it can kick off at any moment, and input from the original poster can often be the key - though we've all see OP's disappear and leave the battlefield to those who want it. Good luck to you all. Let opinionated comment commence... the only opinion I have of you is that you are a cheeky sod!!!! I think i'm actually a lot more measured about what I write now (see, this is what happens when ya count to 10 before typing) I am not a firestarter and I don't take offence to what you put, however I could see how this post could be constued that way bearing in mind we were talking about "hijacks" in other threads
back to topic....
I don't see me as "good looking"... I don't think people tend to see it in themselves, however when I am on meets or in clubs I do think to myself "why have they picked me?"
In a way I think I have a lot more confidence now then I did when I started, and I think that does show in my personality...
"You may not be Denzel Washington but your not an ugly man either. If a man is attractive in some ways and has a decent personality or better he is in with a shout. | |||
""can personality win out over looks......" No. And looks don't win out over personality either." Too true! To the people who put personality first though,just a thought.........If a good looking person has a great personality and an ugly one does too......Which would you choose?
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" looks for me have always been of paramount importance, if i dont think "phwoooooooooooooar" then it aint happening
Ditto to that. She may have a great personality but if she looks like Bella Emberg she ain't getting hold of my John Thomas!!
you must be drop dead gorgeous to every person on the planet then huh?!
"The man has the right to choose and say who he will or won't so no need for sarcasm! | |||
" the key word is ATTRACTION, it's either there or it is not. and thankfully everyone of us is different, otherwise i'd be a busy and tired man. "Precisely and part of that is physical and part is personality. I find its often the less attractive who harp on about it just being personality! | |||
" the key word is ATTRACTION, it's either there or it is not. and thankfully everyone of us is different, otherwise i'd be a busy and tired man. "Here Here xxx god there is someone out there for everyone. We cant all like same thing ... things i find Attractive some may not ... its each to there own.. | |||
" looks for me have always been of paramount importance, if i dont think "phwoooooooooooooar" then it aint happening
Ditto to that. She may have a great personality but if she looks like Bella Emberg she ain't getting hold of my John Thomas!!
you must be drop dead gorgeous to every person on the planet then huh?!
The man has the right to choose and say who he will or won't so no need for sarcasm! "wow! the humour police are in tonight then? love how some folk are allowed to joke and others not.....  | |||
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" looks for me have always been of paramount importance, if i dont think "phwoooooooooooooar" then it aint happening
Ditto to that. She may have a great personality but if she looks like Bella Emberg she ain't getting hold of my John Thomas!!
you must be drop dead gorgeous to every person on the planet then huh?!
The man has the right to choose and say who he will or won't so no need for sarcasm!
wow! the humour police are in tonight then?
love how some folk are allowed to joke and others not..... "Everyone is allowed to joke but just putting a smile at the end of your comments dont mean you can be rude to people and then pretend you meant otherwise. If you don't like an adverse reaction dont use sarcasm its not hard to understand!!! | |||
" looks for me have always been of paramount importance, if i dont think "phwoooooooooooooar" then it aint happening
Ditto to that. She may have a great personality but if she looks like Bella Emberg she ain't getting hold of my John Thomas!!
you must be drop dead gorgeous to every person on the planet then huh?!
The man has the right to choose and say who he will or won't so no need for sarcasm!
wow! the humour police are in tonight then?
love how some folk are allowed to joke and others not.....
Everyone is allowed to joke but just putting a smile at the end of your comments dont mean you can be rude to people and then pretend you meant otherwise. If you don't like an adverse reaction dont use sarcasm its not hard to understand!!! "i've had and seen worse and the people take it in good faith. the person i responded to never made any comment and if they had i would apologise to them personally. i dont feel the need to answer to you on this matter as it wasnt you i responded to. also not said in bad faith! | |||
" looks for me have always been of paramount importance, if i dont think "phwoooooooooooooar" then it aint happening
Ditto to that. She may have a great personality but if she looks like Bella Emberg she ain't getting hold of my John Thomas!!
you must be drop dead gorgeous to every person on the planet then huh?!
The man has the right to choose and say who he will or won't so no need for sarcasm!
wow! the humour police are in tonight then?
love how some folk are allowed to joke and others not.....
Everyone is allowed to joke but just putting a smile at the end of your comments dont mean you can be rude to people and then pretend you meant otherwise. If you don't like an adverse reaction dont use sarcasm its not hard to understand!!!
i've had and seen worse and the people take it in good faith.
the person i responded to never made any comment and if they had i would apologise to them personally.
i dont feel the need to answer to you on this matter as it wasnt you i responded to.
also not said in bad faith!
"You posted a sarcastic remark and if its available for all to read its available for all to comment on so you do not need to hop on your soap box. I found your sarcasm uncalled for and retain the right to comment on it. | |||
" You posted a sarcastic remark and if its available for all to read its available for all to comment on so you do not need to hop on your soap box. I found your sarcasm uncalled for and retain the right to comment on it." ...i'm not rising to your bait. if you want to discuss it you should do it off the thread. | |||
" You posted a sarcastic remark and if its available for all to read its available for all to comment on so you do not need to hop on your soap box. I found your sarcasm uncalled for and retain the right to comment on it. ...i'm not rising to your bait. if you want to discuss it you should do it off the thread." I am not discussing i am telling you. Now sit down, digest what i have said and just take on board people may react adversely to your comments on here. | |||
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" You posted a sarcastic remark and if its available for all to read its available for all to comment on so you do not need to hop on your soap box. I found your sarcasm uncalled for and retain the right to comment on it. ...i'm not rising to your bait. if you want to discuss it you should do it off the thread. I am not discussing i am telling you. Now sit down, digest what i have said and just take on board people may react adversely to your comments on here. " and i am not a three year old to be told. if you want to talk about offensive, i am finding your attitude to one of a bully. out of all the responses here, you have singled out mine. more than happy to discuss in private, but i'm sure you would rather have the last word on this thread for all to see. | |||
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" I am not discussing i am telling you. Now sit down, digest what i have said and just take on board people may react adversely to your comments on here. " errrmm sorry but forum is for discussion. noone is here or has right to TELL anyone anything . if u have issue i advised goingthrough proper channels and not airing it on here where as u said ,ALL CAN SEE | |||
"Now Now ladies - It is only an internet forum after all and everyone is entitled to their own opinions whether you agree with them or not! "I would fully agree with you on that. As they have the right to disagree. I respect someone's opinion but find sarcasm a rather unpleasant trait, surely a man with guiness pants wouldn't deny me that pleasure | |||
Vice versa is also true. | |||
"Now Now ladies - It is only an internet forum after all and everyone is entitled to their own opinions whether you agree with them or not!
I would fully agree with you on that. As they have the right to disagree. I respect someone's opinion but find sarcasm a rather unpleasant trait, surely a man with guiness pants wouldn't deny me that pleasure "TBH you are maybe both being as bad as each other on the sarcasm front and it won't be me, in or out, of guiness pants that will be putting a stop to it! | |||
"Now Now ladies - It is only an internet forum after all and everyone is entitled to their own opinions whether you agree with them or not!
I would fully agree with you on that. As they have the right to disagree. I respect someone's opinion but find sarcasm a rather unpleasant trait, surely a man with guiness pants wouldn't deny me that pleasure
TBH you are maybe both being as bad as each other on the sarcasm front and it won't be me, in or out, of guiness pants that will be putting a stop to it! "I would never claim to be whiter than white just reacting to a comment i didn't agree with. As for your pants, well behave or i will give you a weggie! | |||
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" You posted a sarcastic remark and if its available for all to read its available for all to comment on so you do not need to hop on your soap box. I found your sarcasm uncalled for and retain the right to comment on it. ...i'm not rising to your bait. if you want to discuss it you should do it off the thread. I am not discussing i am telling you. Now sit down, digest what i have said and just take on board people may react adversely to your comments on here. " what the f*** is that about.i thought the comment was sarcastic and funny.is that only alloud by some,but not for others.besides one of the most opinionated,sarcastic,people on here is wishy.and i love his posts,all the better for it.calm down it was only a friggin joke,and a good one. commence attack. | |||
" was loving this post on the forum please dont spoil it .... when a post make you think its good and this one has today ..... " apologies to _abio and the posters of this forum x | |||
"Now Now ladies - It is only an internet forum after all and everyone is entitled to their own opinions whether you agree with them or not!
I would fully agree with you on that. As they have the right to disagree. I respect someone's opinion but find sarcasm a rather unpleasant trait, surely a man with guiness pants wouldn't deny me that pleasure
TBH you are maybe both being as bad as each other on the sarcasm front and it won't be me, in or out, of guiness pants that will be putting a stop to it!
I would never claim to be whiter than white just reacting to a comment i didn't agree with. As for your pants, well behave or i will give you a weggie! "Sorry but I never do as I am told - never a Sub here
Now let's get back to the OP! | |||
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"back to the op.i find this a really hard one.i never know,whether people like me.because i have a brilliant personality.or because im a handsome bastard.sometimes having it all,isnt good thing.only kidding,its friggin brilliant,ha ha ha. "it's great that you can play down your looks though....hardly noticed it as it's your personality that just shines through. ....of to eat my cake and have it | |||
"there been a few times iv seen someone and thought err no my cuppa tea but once iv started chattin with them there is something there! but on the flipside iv seen people and though phwwwooooarr but them talk to them and my will to live leaves! we funny us humans!! x" ain't we just | |||
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"if the personality aint there then person leaves me cold! yes has to be an attraction there but for me its something that comes with time .the x factor lol!! theres ppl who you just click with on every level .thats more of a foundation than an brief "coor their hot" .has to be substance there for me " there's a guy i work with. not what most would call attractive, not at all interesting and has the personality of a bull and is not even what you'd consider well built. but for some reason if i sit in a meeting with him, i spend the whole time wanting to jump over the table, rip open his shirt and sink my teeth into his chest. i just cant work out what it is about him that i like he even smokes and often smells of beer and cigarettes. there is nothing about him that i can pinpoint. it's darn confusing! | |||
"if the personality aint there then person leaves me cold! yes has to be an attraction there but for me its something that comes with time .the x factor lol!! theres ppl who you just click with on every level .thats more of a foundation than an brief "coor their hot" .has to be substance there for me there's a guy i work with. not what most would call attractive, not at all interesting and has the personality of a bull and is not even what you'd consider well built. but for some reason if i sit in a meeting with him, i spend the whole time wanting to jump over the table, rip open his shirt and sink my teeth into his chest. i just cant work out what it is about him that i like he even smokes and often smells of beer and cigarettes. there is nothing about him that i can pinpoint. it's darn confusing!" hes a real guy.what every woman wants.yous just wont admit it.we all want a nice guy,who is mannerly,attentive,gives us our place.bull,that guy would bore the arse of yous in a matter of months.just friggin admit it.stop punishing yourselves. | |||
"hes a real guy.what every woman wants.yous just wont admit it.we all want a nice guy,who is mannerly,attentive,gives us our place.bull,that guy would bore the arse of yous in a matter of months.just friggin admit it.stop punishing yourselves. "hahaha...you's is probably right...he's defo an alpha male! i actually think all the men would suck his cock too if he told them to....and would be equally confused! | |||
"hes a real guy.what every woman wants.yous just wont admit it.we all want a nice guy,who is mannerly,attentive,gives us our place.bull,that guy would bore the arse of yous in a matter of months.just friggin admit it.stop punishing yourselves.
hahaha...you's is probably right...he's defo an alpha male! i actually think all the men would suck his cock too if he told them to....and would be equally confused!"what do you mean probably right.not only do i have a brilliant personality,im unrealisticly handsome.im also never wrong.only kidding,i was wrong as recently as 1994. | |||
Personnally...I think a woman who is funny, open and intelligent is far more sexy than some dope who doesnt even know whats in the news..(unless it involves Jordan (real name Katie Price) or some attention seeking no mark from big brother..
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"See Fabio. Read every response. They all say looks. And yeah people say its personality too or personality even more so than looks... the problem being if there is a girl sat at the table, you have to be good looking to be able to sit next to her and show her your personality... the problem being for ugly guys, they arent allowed to sit next to them. Sure im exagorating but the point is there, if you dont have the looks then you cant sit at the table. Btw Fabio, I dont see swingers as 3rd on the list as you put it, it is equal.. i only found out that a Swingers site existed a month ago ok pal?
The thing is though Matt,it all depends on what you class as good looking in a guy.
O.K there are the classical good looks and there are the pretty boy good looks.
But some women,Trace is one of them,can also go for unconventional looks.
I'm definitely no oil painting but Trace fancies me,even though I've no idea why,I must have caught her at a low ebb,lol.
You don't always have to look like Brad Pitt to attract a nice looking partner as I'm sure a lot of guys on here will vouch for. R"But thats the thing, whats good looking for some are not for others and personally i think you are hot stuff and obviously Tracey thought so too | |||
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"Personality does it for me every time. Looks are just a bonus." Well you're a rarity then | |||
"For me that has to be some attraction there, even if they had the most amazing personality in the world I couldn't do anything if they were really awful looking. Likewise they could be the most stunning person but if the personality isn't there then it's a no go. " I think especially online looks does play a major part and with the high volume of mail most females get they can afford to be understandably choosy and selective on here. Your first message must therefore be as good as you can make it - this is the initial 'personality' element most ladies add to your pic to make the judgement - 'Is this guy worth it?' With no thought and little wit the answer is usually NO! I think apart from this forum it is quite hard to strike up a rapport with individuals which I like doing A feature where you can have a chat to people you're friends with only would be good a la Facebook. I have lurked on these forums more and more cos i do like the banter and 'organised' chat that you can strike up.
I even look on ppl's profiles who I think are cool based on what they say - values, opinions and a sense of humour rarely come to the fore in one short message xx Plus i can see who are the perviest hahahaha | |||
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"chatted to guys who have been what society dictates as attractive and they have been complete tossers. Chatted others who are not so hot but their humour and intelligence has attracted me. Its all down to peoples individual perceptions " Good points there...humour is a massive turn on for me..(male half) given that male and female can often at two seperate poles, I find there is nother better than a funny woman.. There is another factor too IMHO ..the type of person you are yourself..of course all guys find very attractive women with beautiful bodies etc attractive...and vice versa for women..but reality has to play a part too...if a guy isnt well blessed in the looks/personality/body dept then he knows in his heart of hearts that a page three stunna type just isnt going to go for him...and likewise for women...lets be honest..how often to to see an ugly guy with a beautiful woman and vice versa?...rare at best..so we tend to accpet that certain types are the best we are going to get...and in most cases we are contented with that. | |||
"I think though if the guys on here the ones that are young too good looking I think why on earth are they emailing me is it because they think im easy because I know for a fact that if they met me in a normal club they would'nt look at me twice. Got a lift to chams by two very sexy guys last night but not my type me and my friend molly all went as friends but as soon as we got in there they went of with two skinny birds I dont mind because I was having fun of my own. But my friend was insulted and thought it was a bit rude." I feel the same too hence i wouldnt meet them for all the money in china | |||
