FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Failed meets
Failed meets
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Does anyone else have multiple experiences of meets being arranged and then you travel to location to be ghosted and ignored when you get there? Last nite a meet was arranged and I told the couple I was leaving home and it would take 25 mins to get to Solihull then when I arrived at postcode and asked for house number all went silent and messages were not read even though the couple was on line for 20 more minutes!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yep.
I had one that was arranged, “he’d” messaged the very same day to say he had checked into the hotel etc etc.
I told him I was leaving but I wanted him to FaceTime me first, to verify his identity.
He said ok, will do - blocked!
Luckily I had somewhere else to be but what an absolute saddo.
The profile is still active  |
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"Does anyone else have multiple experiences of meets being arranged and then you travel to location to be ghosted and ignored when you get there? Last nite a meet was arranged and I told the couple I was leaving home and it would take 25 mins to get to Solihull then when I arrived at postcode and asked for house number all went silent and messages were not read even though the couple was on line for 20 more minutes! "
I've had this twice. I took half a shift off work for one of them. |
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Absolutely always speak by phone first. I once turned up at house for a meet, only to find it was a con by an "ex". Unfortunate lady was very upset, and I nearly ended up as witness in a stalking case. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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This seems to be an occupational hazard of swinging.
Many years ago, in my first incarnation as a swinger, this also happened to me. I was driving to Milton Keynes (a good hour away). Got to within 10 minutes of my destination and was told can’t meet’ by text. That was it . After that no further messages of mine were replied and no further phone calls of mine were taken. I asked them why and to this day I never received any kind of response let alone justification. In fact there was no further contact even though i did try. They just avoided me like the plague or so it seemed.
Still I’m a firm believer in Karma. What goes around comes around. They will get theirs some point down the line. |
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By *immiTV/TS
over a year ago
Middlesbrough |
Being ghosted by couples profiles is very common, the reason I think is because they are fake profiles handled by a disgruntled male who are looking for some perv chatting and when it comes to do the real stuff they have to vanish.
This post by now means is to disrespect the genuine males and couples out there |
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By *_T_WWoman
over a year ago
Stockport/ Leeds |
I’ve become much more careful how I go about meets . I would always video call with someone first - to make sure they are real. It still doesn’t mean they will definitely turn up , but I’ve never had someone bail since doing video calls . Also if travelling it might be helpful to get the postcode before you set off |
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By *immiTV/TS
over a year ago
Middlesbrough |
"This seems to be an occupational hazard of swinging.
Many years ago, in my first incarnation as a swinger, this also happened to me. I was driving to Milton Keynes (a good hour away). Got to within 10 minutes of my destination and was told can’t meet’ by text. That was it . After that no further messages of mine were replied and no further phone calls of mine were taken. I asked them why and to this day I never received any kind of response let alone justification. In fact there was no further contact even though i did try. They just avoided me like the plague or so it seemed.
Still I’m a firm believer in Karma. What goes around comes around. They will get theirs some point down the line. "
U tried? Y? Just consider it a newbie mistake and move on, just be a bit careful next time. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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What I can never fathom is why a single guy would not turn up etc. It’s been well documented on here how hard it is for a single guy, such as myself, to get any attention let alone get as far as a meet. I just don’t get it. But like many have said maybe the person behind the profile is not being honest and is in fact married etc and just using this his profile facade to get his rocks off. I’m just too naive  |
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Never had a failed meet. I chat extensively on here and mainly to women.
I get the impression that they are the most reliable anyway, but, once they know you are serious, they have been 100% honest and straight forward.
Mind you, most of my meets were at my home and they had no reason to doubt me.
This is where verifications help massively for single guys. Those I meet can see that I am a reliable and trustworthy fabber and that reassures them...or so they have said.
Anyway OP, this is just a blip and I wish you well for further meets.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes I have had a failed meet, we were suppose to meet at a hotel he didn't show. I stayed the night in the hotel and got another meet, all wasn't lost  the original meet messaged the next day and said do you fancy some outdoor fun, let me think! you left me with a £100 hotel bill with no explanation. Get f##ked! He's still active on here. |
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By *host63Man
over a year ago
Bedfont Feltham |
All the time. Its got to the point now I fully expect to be ghosted on here.
Its sad, unnecessary, and more often than not a total waste of time money and effort.
In my case I even booked and paid for a hotel at her insistence only to be utterly gohsted when I got there. This has haplend with singles, and couples, alike.
All they had to do is say they changes their minds before I went to the effort.
Seriously thinkingnif giving up swinging as all its turned out to be full of fantasist and fakes.
You can only stay positive for so long
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"Yes I have had a failed meet, we were suppose to meet at a hotel he didn't show. I stayed the night in the hotel and got another meet, all wasn't lost the original meet messaged the next day and said do you fancy some outdoor fun, let me think! you left me with a £100 hotel bill with no explanation. Get f##ked! He's still active on here."
What convinced you about him to book a hotel for a meeting with I guy I assume you had never met before? Just curious |
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We tend to offer a phone verification before any ‘private’ meets, let’s face it, if they wish to have sex with you, surely a phone conversation first would only be polite. Alternately , we meet at social venues with other fabs couples at the same time . |
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"I'd have to have spoken/facetimed before any meet would be agreed and it would be somewhere public and close to me.
But you have no verifications at all ? "
Yes she does. Not displayed but there. Look for the tick |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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never used our phones never used our emails and never used any apps yet cant remember the last no show .... we only use fab we could get a meet everyday by only using fab .... these who like to mess people around genrally show that they are messer's from the start /// first inking of being messed around = blocked
normally if its too easy or to good to be true then its going to be a messer as for those insisting on a phone call lol jog on never will never have and if it keeps happening then time to look at yourself and how you do things
what seems pretty straight forward is that there are alot of bored or maybe even jealous men doing this to cause misery and the more men that join the less will get meets leaving more to create havoc .... and yes i know women and couples mess around too
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yep i have. This couple messaged me (the mrs did) and wanted me to meet her on her lunch break in the woods and suck my cock and fill her up for her hubby. Chats going well and seems legit so i arrive at said location on time and when I message to say im there i got ignored then eventually blocked  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yep happened to me a few weeks ago. Travelled into London for a meet only to be left hanging.
All sorts of excuses given via what's app about family had just turned up etc etc.
So after a while I bailed and want back home |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes I have had a failed meet, we were suppose to meet at a hotel he didn't show. I stayed the night in the hotel and got another meet, all wasn't lost the original meet messaged the next day and said do you fancy some outdoor fun, let me think! you left me with a £100 hotel bill with no explanation. Get f##ked! He's still active on here.
What convinced you about him to book a hotel for a meeting with I guy I assume you had never met before? Just curious "
We'd spoken for 3 months prior to
agreeing to meet for a scenario I wanted to do but he failed to show so it didn't happen. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yep i have. This couple messaged me (the mrs did) and wanted me to meet her on her lunch break in the woods and suck my cock and fill her up for her hubby. Chats going well and seems legit so i arrive at said location on time and when I message to say im there i got ignored then eventually blocked "
Do you really think it was the woman that messaged you? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I get let down lots. I dont acco so i rely on men picking me up and take me to a place i use on meets.But the ? is how long do i wait over the time am due to be picked up.ten mins? Twenty? I was let down by a guy two nights ago. He seemed keen to meet. Gave him details of where to pick me up.he said he was on way.he didnt show up. I could of had a meet with another man but had to wait to see if first guy showed up. So i waited around.it got late so coudnt meet the other man.The fear is the ist guy turning up late while i have agreed to meet the other intrested guy who might be on way to meet me. |
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Never had a no show but …
I realise that as a woman it’s easier to set the rules and mine is “ social in my home town at a time convenient to me “ .
I would never take time off work to meet strangers that might not show up and I wouldn’t travel more than 20 minutes for the same reason.
However I do get late cancellations and people do disappear once a date has been arranged and I suspect it’s partially due to realising that no amount of cajoling will make me bypass the initial social.
Neither of them are an issue as they don’t cause me any inconvenience.
I think that’s the key for me, fab is meant to be fun … not bring me aggravations .
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'd have to have spoken/facetimed before any meet would be agreed and it would be somewhere public and close to me.
But you have no verifications at all ? "
I actually do I simply don't display them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'd have to have spoken/facetimed before any meet would be agreed and it would be somewhere public and close to me.
But you have no verifications at all ?
Yes she does. Not displayed but there. Look for the tick"
Thank you x |
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"I'd have to have spoken/facetimed before any meet would be agreed and it would be somewhere public and close to me.
But you have no verifications at all ?
Yes she does. Not displayed but there. Look for the tick"
I always find that a bit iffy tbh |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Had one just this morning. Couple in Swansea messaged me asking for a meet. They even sent me their face pics. Gave them my postcode, they said "on our way, be 30 mins". Still waiting. Now blocked them. Some strange people about |
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"I'd have to have spoken/facetimed before any meet would be agreed and it would be somewhere public and close to me.
But you have no verifications at all ?
Yes she does. Not displayed but there. Look for the tick
I always find that a bit iffy tbh "
I seldom display my verifications, a personal choice. Doesn’t seem to impede my appeal  |
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"Does anyone else have multiple experiences of meets being arranged and then you travel to location to be ghosted and ignored when you get there? Last nite a meet was arranged and I told the couple I was leaving home and it would take 25 mins to get to Solihull then when I arrived at postcode and asked for house number all went silent and messages were not read even though the couple was on line for 20 more minutes! "
Several over the years. The site is full of dreamers, fantasists and those who just get a kick out of wasting others’ time. Oh, and let’s not forget the wankers - meant literally. |
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Yes. My wife and I went to meet this guy at a hotel he was supposedly staying at but weirdly he wasn’t there when we got there. Then he said he was stuck in traffic? After an hour of sitting in the bar we gave up and left. His loss but annoying for us too. |
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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago
Calderdale innit |
I've not been meeting for ages, but only ever been stood up once.
Years ago, he was the one pestering to meet, arranged a social at a bar, no sign of him and he had been texting all day.
I messaged him and he said he'd changed his mind and I wasn't his type?!
He left site soon after, fast forward few months, he rejoins and asks to meet. Think he was a bit shocked when I reminded him I wasn't his type so why bother, he tried to say he got cold feet the night we were due to meet. He never got another chance to mess me about.
I genuinely don't get why people do this to others. |
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So much here I agree with.
We have got so tired of no shows with guys - or those that show up and clearly have zero resemblance to their photos - that we only use Fab to set up a club meet with a guy.
If they then don't show up, who cares, we have a good night with someone else.
I feel for the genuine guys on here but if they really want to get laid, go to a club a few times, start meeting people from the scene and then you will be off.
Last advice - pick your club nights, a night like Hot wives club etc where the couples are there actively seeking single men will be far better than a night that is aimed at couples who want to meet other couples. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've not been meeting for ages, but only ever been stood up once.
Years ago, he was the one pestering to meet, arranged a social at a bar, no sign of him and he had been texting all day.
I messaged him and he said he'd changed his mind and I wasn't his type?!
He left site soon after, fast forward few months, he rejoins and asks to meet. Think he was a bit shocked when I reminded him I wasn't his type so why bother, he tried to say he got cold feet the night we were due to meet. He never got another chance to mess me about.
I genuinely don't get why people do this to others. "
totally agree. I had a guy do same to me,pestered to meet then not turn up.he left the site.came back with a different username only to try again to meet up. I told him no.he left site again. |
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"I get let down lots. I dont acco so i rely on men picking me up and take me to a place i use on meets.But the ? is how long do i wait over the time am due to be picked up.ten mins? Twenty? I was let down by a guy two nights ago. He seemed keen to meet. Gave him details of where to pick me up.he said he was on way.he didnt show up. I could of had a meet with another man but had to wait to see if first guy showed up. So i waited around.it got late so coudnt meet the other man.The fear is the ist guy turning up late while i have agreed to meet the other intrested guy who might be on way to meet me."
This happened to me a few weeks ago too... Messaging for months first then no show at pick u lacr... I waited half hour I'm the cold |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’ve never had a failed meet with women or couples. But before meeting I insist on video call and be given address, also won’t meet unverified. This seems to out the fantasists and time wasters. It’s pretty obvious when a ‘female’ profile is saddo called Brian whacking off at home by catfishing guys!
Must admit it’s guys which let me down. Frequently guys will bottle it I think. Despite the same checks, guys will still chicken out. Worry’s about performance probably or whether they are really bi. I’ve been sat with playmate watching a guy stood outside our place obviously nervous about knocking on the door and sucking his first cock! Sometimes they pluck up the courage sometimes they run back to their cars! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I got stood up in favour of watching football with his mates. When he tried to arrange another attempt I just told him to fuck off "
Can I have that guys details? Need to have a chat about wasted opportunities and priorities. What an idiot. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve never had a failed meet with women or couples. But before meeting I insist on video call and be given address, also won’t meet unverified. This seems to out the fantasists and time wasters. It’s pretty obvious when a ‘female’ profile is saddo called Brian whacking off at home by catfishing guys!
Must admit it’s guys which let me down. Frequently guys will bottle it I think. Despite the same checks, guys will still chicken out. Worry’s about performance probably or whether they are really bi. I’ve been sat with playmate watching a guy stood outside our place obviously nervous about knocking on the door and sucking his first cock! Sometimes they pluck up the courage sometimes they run back to their cars! "
That actually reminded me of meeting a guy at a club , went back to hotel. After a while he just said sorry he wanted to find out but just not for him. Was very polite about it. We chatted a while then he left. Couldn't be mad at him of course,he was very sweet about it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" That actually reminded me of meeting a guy at a club , went back to hotel. After a while he just said sorry he wanted to find out but just not for him. Was very polite about it. We chatted a while then he left. Couldn't be mad at him of course,he was very sweet about it. "
That’s actually honest isn’t it, that’s acceptable I think, though annoying if you’ve turned down other options for your evening! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yep.
I had one that was arranged, “he’d” messaged the very same day to say he had checked into the hotel etc etc.
I told him I was leaving but I wanted him to FaceTime me first, to verify his identity.
He said ok, will do - blocked!
Luckily I had somewhere else to be but what an absolute saddo.
The profile is still active "
Name and shame, time wasters need to be called out. |
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Had plenty of single guys not show up, a unicorn with the worst excuse ever, one time a couple didn't show. If the reason is genuine we have no issues, but ghosting behaviour should get accounts closed down. |
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Only been on the site a few weeks and currently H is meeting solo (she films the meets for me). She is a total hottie and yet has still been ghosted several times by guys she has arranged meets with. Lots of contact and talk about the meet, swapping pics etc, dates, times and locations all confirmed right up until the day of the meet and then nothing, completely ghosted.
I get that life can get in the way, things come up and priorities change but it’s just common decency to drop a message if you have to cancel or have changed your mind.
The worse thing is, all these guys have been verified on the site. Ah well, their loss! |
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"Does anyone else have multiple experiences of meets being arranged and then you travel to location to be ghosted and ignored when you get there? Last nite a meet was arranged and I told the couple I was leaving home and it would take 25 mins to get to Solihull then when I arrived at postcode and asked for house number all went silent and messages were not read even though the couple was on line for 20 more minutes! "
Yeah …. I’m chatting to a couple now and arranged a meet for tonight, even swapped numbers. When I’ve asked for a location on where to meet they won’t reply. I’ll give them until 19.00 hrs tonight to give a location otherwise block and delete
So, frustrating |
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"We find the biggest problem is chats suddenly coming to an end when going so well. Never mind, we move on. "
Agreed.
I’ve met a few women and never been stood up; but getting ghosted (occasionally even mid-conversation) and sometimes with women who I’ve had pretty long and deep interactions with. |
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"Does anyone else have multiple experiences of meets being arranged and then you travel to location to be ghosted and ignored when you get there? Last nite a meet was arranged and I told the couple I was leaving home and it would take 25 mins to get to Solihull then when I arrived at postcode and asked for house number all went silent and messages were not read even though the couple was on line for 20 more minutes!
Yeah …. I’m chatting to a couple now and arranged a meet for tonight, even swapped numbers. When I’ve asked for a location on where to meet they won’t reply. I’ll give them until 19.00 hrs tonight to give a location otherwise block and delete
So, frustrating "
UPDATE: Well as expected the couple I was chatting to about meeting tonight didn’t give a location or reply to my messages asking ….. bunch of Wannabe time wasters.
If they had changed their minds they should have said instead of keeping me hanging on
What goes around comes around |
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"Why? Why would anyone drive to just a postcode?
Seems like a lottery to me   "
I never give out my house number until meet arrives just postcode don't like the idea of giving a total stranger my house number just feels a bit safer |
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"Why? Why would anyone drive to just a postcode?
Seems like a lottery to me "
I only give my post code, but it's just one road. Then when they park, I give them the house number.
Part of the reason I always social first... Happens more with them, but then that's not such a big deal. Had one guy who was a no show, car broke down, bit didn't tell me until well after he should have been here. But at least I was only at home. |
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"Only been on the site a few weeks and currently H is meeting solo (she films the meets for me). She is a total hottie and yet has still been ghosted several times by guys she has arranged meets with. Lots of contact and talk about the meet, swapping pics etc, dates, times and locations all confirmed right up until the day of the meet and then nothing, completely ghosted.
I get that life can get in the way, things come up and priorities change but it’s just common decency to drop a message if you have to cancel or have changed your mind.
The worse thing is, all these guys have been verified on the site. Ah well, their loss! "
Don't go into too much detail, they're probably just sat at home having a wank. |
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"Don't go into too much detail, they're probably just sat at home having a wank."
Yeah, I can understand that but for us, especially me as I’m not attending the meets with H, the talk and build up to the meet is all part of the fun and excitement. You’d think after all that talk and build up, they would be even more eager to meet her for real and fuck her brains out!
Several years ago, when me and H first started talking (we met online), I jumped on a train last minute to go to the other side of the country because I couldn’t wait to get my hands on her! |
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"
I’ve met a few women and never been stood up; but getting ghosted (occasionally even mid-conversation) and sometimes with women who I’ve had pretty long and deep interactions with. "
The ghosting bit is the worst when you feel like you've actually got a genuine connection. A couple of weeks ago I randomly met a very nice young lady in the pub after work. We had intended to go on to a local club but forgot we needed covid passes which neither of us had. So we ended up going back to mine, the conversation was interesting and flowed easily, we enjoyed a bit of a kiss and some sexy time. Fell asleep in each other's arms on the sofa. The next day we hung out in my house, had a few drinks, ordered pizza, more great conversation, more sex, and again fell asleep in each other's arms again. The next morning I drove her back to her place at her request, a smoochy kiss goodbye... And now, no communication at all. Tried messaging her a few times, left on read. I really don't get it - if she wasn't enjoying my company why stay round at mine all that time, food, drink, the whole falling asleep in each other's arms thing... It's baffling! Or if she's not keen to see my again, why not just say so? |
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"Yep.
I had one that was arranged, “he’d” messaged the very same day to say he had checked into the hotel etc etc.
I told him I was leaving but I wanted him to FaceTime me first, to verify his identity.
He said ok, will do - blocked!
Luckily I had somewhere else to be but what an absolute saddo.
The profile is still active "
He must be mad to off stood you up
Maybe he had used a filter on his pic or the photos weren't recent that's the only reason I can think of |
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I m yet to have a meet on here
Got talking to one couple who are into gaming offered to meet for a social at a video game / acade type place thought they would of liked that didn't even get a reply
Tried to arrange a social meet during lockdown to meet for take out food an chat she asked for a face pic I sent one got blocked |
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By *azziegWoman
over a year ago
Atherton |
We have had a couple recently.. travelled to one as well... Lessons learned absolutely.. both guys were reported a for it..
Talk to them , be it couples,guys etc.
When you think your ready to meet get their number first! So you not pestered privately from an unknown number! And an upto date picture.
Get an address with house number or name
Of the hotel so you can phone and verify.
Ring or facetime them way before your meet ie. A hour before your even getting ready!
We follow these simple rules now and just shows how many odd bods are on here..
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By *onic2Man
over a year ago
Bromley |
My two pence worth.
So I've been on FabSwingers since 2014.
(I've no idea until I just check wow!)
Even as recently as last week when I had a lady friend over and we have a video chat with a local fellow for 20-minutes.... He said he was booking the cab and coming over..
Then hent me a text message to ask "what are we going to do"
I replied" pleasure her"....
After that absolutely nothing... No communication and blocked.
And there were quite a lot of other interested parties who we turned down.
She took it rather personally ?? and it pretty much killed the evening after that.
I've also driven 30 minutes to see a couple who literally stopped communication when I was five minutes away on Kik messenger that's why I don't use it anymore.
Single guys;
Ok so in the majority of cases I think it is because of FOMO.... Everybody likes that feeling that they're going to be the chosen one and it makes them feel good... No one wants to turn down a meet....
And they don't have the bullocks to say no sorry I'm actually busy, because they're scared they're missing out an opportunity which is stupid because they can't even fulfill that obligation.
Then you get the age-old excuse of some of my family have just come round or it's a bit too late now have to go to work in the morning (well it wasn't so fucking late two hours ago when you started this rambling conversation mate!)
I'll post my thoughts on the couples who do it in a bit I've just like to hear people's replies to this post
I've also analysed what's broken and how it can be fixed.
(Unfortunately I've been on this website to know that even if everyone in this thread agreed it was the perfect solution it wouldn't be changed by admin) |
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We've had a couple in recent months and both by well verified members on here.
First one was chatting a lot on here right up until the day before, then was reading messages but not replying. Blocked him
Second one, messages and texts right up until half an hour before the meet and then messaged to say he would be late as he had taken his son to the cinema, when asked how late his reply was 'late!!' Told him not to bother and blocked him. Think he was doing a little payback though as we had to cancel previously for a family emergency, but we did tell him 12 hours before we were due to meet not 20 minutes. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not multiple but I'm more switched on with it.
I recently had someone ask me to go to a hotel but wouldn't call me or give me a room number. That was enough for me not to bother
I insist on facetime now and wouldn't set off to an unknown address X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was with a male friend the other day. I got chatting to a local guy on fab who said he could accom. Asked what we were after. I told him i was after a fuck and my male friend was willing to wait as he had a meet later that evening.after more chatting we were both going to go to guy's home and after a cuppa myself and the man were going to play and my male friend would wait.it didnt happen reason why the guy who could accom made a comment asking about my friend that sounded like he was more intrested in him.my male friend then refused to take me to meet the guy.why on earth when he had the chance to meet then spoil it by showing more intrest in the other person whos not there to play.the guy tried to backtrack but it was too late.if a guy shows more intrest in the male am with the meet aint gunna happen. |
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This is why I prefer clubs when I can. No one’s time is wasted, if someone wants to meet there that’s cool. Can still make a night of it, it’s a safe environment.
I would never have an off the cuff meet or dirty chat with anyone on here. Just fuelling wank fodder. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was with a male friend the other day. I got chatting to a local guy on fab who said he could accom. Asked what we were after. I told him i was after a fuck and my male friend was willing to wait as he had a meet later that evening.after more chatting we were both going to go to guy's home and after a cuppa myself and the man were going to play and my male friend would wait.it didnt happen reason why the guy who could accom made a comment asking about my friend that sounded like he was more intrested in him.my male friend then refused to take me to meet the guy.why on earth when he had the chance to meet then spoil it by showing more intrest in the other person whos not there to play.the guy tried to backtrack but it was too late.if a guy shows more intrest in the male am with the meet aint gunna happen."
You were going to have a guy you met to drive you to meet another guy ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is why I prefer clubs when I can. No one’s time is wasted, if someone wants to meet there that’s cool. Can still make a night of it, it’s a safe environment.
I would never have an off the cuff meet or dirty chat with anyone on here. Just fuelling wank fodder."
Exactly this. A trip to wank bank
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By *T100Man
over a year ago
Chester |
"Yep.
I had one that was arranged, “he’d” messaged the very same day to say he had checked into the hotel etc etc.
I told him I was leaving but I wanted him to FaceTime me first, to verify his identity.
He said ok, will do - blocked!
Luckily I had somewhere else to be but what an absolute saddo.
The profile is still active "
He must be insane to cancel a meet with you.
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"Yes I have had a failed meet, we were suppose to meet at a hotel he didn't show. I stayed the night in the hotel and got another meet, all wasn't lost the original meet messaged the next day and said do you fancy some outdoor fun, let me think! you left me with a £100 hotel bill with no explanation. Get f##ked! He's still active on here.
What convinced you about him to book a hotel for a meeting with I guy I assume you had never met before? Just curious
We'd spoken for 3 months prior to
agreeing to meet for a scenario I wanted to do but he failed to show so it didn't happen."
Really cannot understand why people do that. Chat for all that time and then no show |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes I have had a failed meet, we were suppose to meet at a hotel he didn't show. I stayed the night in the hotel and got another meet, all wasn't lost the original meet messaged the next day and said do you fancy some outdoor fun, let me think! you left me with a £100 hotel bill with no explanation. Get f##ked! He's still active on here.
What convinced you about him to book a hotel for a meeting with I guy I assume you had never met before? Just curious
We'd spoken for 3 months prior to
agreeing to meet for a scenario I wanted to do but he failed to show so it didn't happen.
Really cannot understand why people do that. Chat for all that time and then no show "
Valuable lesson learnt |
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I’ve had it with one couple, gave me address and when I turned up house was in darkness, messaged to check no reply and then blocked so obviously not their real address.
Now I ask what car will be on drive when I turn up so that I don’t knock on a vanillas door |
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Well I have had 4 no shows over years and only a few more actual meets so my 'fail' rate is near to 50% Mixture of couples no show and females no show, but chatting either via here, KIK and via SMS even on phone, same routine nice hotel booked, albeit I was visiting the area so needed a hotel but had upgraded to suite each time. Not sure what other checks to do, other than give up?
On the positive note 5 great meets outweigh the bad ones. |
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By *our HeroMan
over a year ago
south Oxfordshire |
"Yep.
I had one that was arranged, “he’d” messaged the very same day to say he had checked into the hotel etc etc.
I told him I was leaving but I wanted him to FaceTime me first, to verify his identity.
He said ok, will do - blocked!
Luckily I had somewhere else to be but what an absolute saddo.
The profile is still active "
He ghosted and blocked YOU…?!!!
Jeez what was he thinking?!
His loss that’s for sure!! |
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Most people I've meet when going to their houses have just given a postcode and then given full address once I'm there, I suppose it saves giving out address to people whom are not going to turn up. |
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"We think they should be named & shamed to avoid anyone else being messed about, time is very precious to people, well it is to us anyway."
So if we posted a “name and shame” that you’d agreed to meet us, but didn’t turn up….. you’d be happy? |
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If you are a single guy it’s a fact of life - in course of 20 years swinging it’s happened quite a few times - just got to smile about it and think of it as another war storey to tell
my favourite - i arranged to meet a couple at their house in a town an hour away - he wanted to watch through his own window as i played with his wife on the settee - i was told to text when i was at the end of their road to get their house number but not before 8.30pm
i texted at 8.33pm - no answer - texted several more times only to be told i was late and because i hadn’t texted at 8.30pm the moment had passed!! |
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"Yes I have had a failed meet, we were suppose to meet at a hotel he didn't show. I stayed the night in the hotel and got another meet, all wasn't lost the original meet messaged the next day and said do you fancy some outdoor fun, let me think! you left me with a £100 hotel bill with no explanation. Get f##ked! He's still active on here.
What convinced you about him to book a hotel for a meeting with I guy I assume you had never met before? Just curious
We'd spoken for 3 months prior to
agreeing to meet for a scenario I wanted to do but he failed to show so it didn't happen."
I know a lady that had chatted to a guy for two years. He cancelled an hour before and never contacted her since. Work that one out? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes I have had a failed meet, we were suppose to meet at a hotel he didn't show. I stayed the night in the hotel and got another meet, all wasn't lost the original meet messaged the next day and said do you fancy some outdoor fun, let me think! you left me with a £100 hotel bill with no explanation. Get f##ked! He's still active on here.
What convinced you about him to book a hotel for a meeting with I guy I assume you had never met before? Just curious
We'd spoken for 3 months prior to
agreeing to meet for a scenario I wanted to do but he failed to show so it didn't happen.
I know a lady that had chatted to a guy for two years. He cancelled an hour before and never contacted her since. Work that one out? "
Wow thats a long time, maybe cold feet from him? The anticipation of meeting after that length of time may have been too much. 2 years is a really long time. What was the reason for it taking so long to arrange a meet?. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My first two arranged meets on here (one couple, one guy) were just that. Stood up by both as waiting to get more local directions to where I was meeting them after travelling to meet them. Lessons learned. |
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A female friend and I were having a few days in the Lakes. I suggested she put a meet up. A guy local to that area was all over her like a rash. Said he would come over to our hotel next day.
My friend was a gorgeous blonde lady and her pictures reflected it. She was actually quite exited about having a MFM in our hotel the next night.
The day of the meet. Suprise suprise. He stayed off fab. Popped up again the day after when were were driving home.
His loss, as she had put up a bedroom video of herself wearing beautiful lingerie on the site, for him to see.
“This is what you could have won”. Lol. |
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"Yes I have had a failed meet, we were suppose to meet at a hotel he didn't show. I stayed the night in the hotel and got another meet, all wasn't lost the original meet messaged the next day and said do you fancy some outdoor fun, let me think! you left me with a £100 hotel bill with no explanation. Get f##ked! He's still active on here.
What convinced you about him to book a hotel for a meeting with I guy I assume you had never met before? Just curious
We'd spoken for 3 months prior to
agreeing to meet for a scenario I wanted to do but he failed to show so it didn't happen.
I know a lady that had chatted to a guy for two years. He cancelled an hour before and never contacted her since. Work that one out?
Wow thats a long time, maybe cold feet from him? The anticipation of meeting after that length of time may have been too much. 2 years is a really long time. What was the reason for it taking so long to arrange a meet?."
No idea about why it took two years. Some attached men take it right to the wire. To see if they still have it or not. |
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"If you are a single guy it’s a fact of life - in course of 20 years swinging it’s happened quite a few times - just got to smile about it and think of it as another war storey to tell
my favourite - i arranged to meet a couple at their house in a town an hour away - he wanted to watch through his own window as i played with his wife on the settee - i was told to text when i was at the end of their road to get their house number but not before 8.30pm
i texted at 8.33pm - no answer - texted several more times only to be told i was late and because i hadn’t texted at 8.30pm the moment had passed!! "
To be fair. Anything convoluted like that is a red flag for me. |
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We don't message many people but the two we have messaged who replied stopped replying after swapping they provided us pics. We don't know if it's something we said or they got cold feet but it's infuriating as we don't want to message lots of people at the same time aiming to meet on the same day as we would end up time wasters ourselves. It is very frustrating. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yep.
I had one that was arranged, “he’d” messaged the very same day to say he had checked into the hotel etc etc.
I told him I was leaving but I wanted him to FaceTime me first, to verify his identity.
He said ok, will do - blocked!
Luckily I had somewhere else to be but what an absolute saddo.
The profile is still active "
Yes, it’s the sort of thing that often spoils fab and should be dealt with by the site. |
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We had one no-show in our early days. Arranged a coffee social with another new couple. Drove 20mins to meet them, waited half an hour then came home.
We only had Fab mail as a contact and, thanks to porn restrictions, we couldn't access the site when we were out. Got home to a message saying the male half had to work late. This was sent 5mins AFTER our arranged meet up time when they would have had to leave 25mins before hand. |
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And then there was the time we arranged to meet another local couple. Just about to leave the house when they messaged to say their babysitter had pulled out so they couldn't come. Fair enough.
They then posted a meet veri an hour later from a other couple... |
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"No never
I hope you reported him. Dickheads like that make it impossible for other single males to get meets."
No, they really don't.
The actions of individuals make it impossible for themselves, I'm not going to turn down a meet with someone I'm positively engaging with because a random idiot didn't show. |
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"Does anyone else have multiple experiences of meets being arranged and then you travel to location to be ghosted and ignored when you get there? Last nite a meet was arranged and I told the couple I was leaving home and it would take 25 mins to get to Solihull then when I arrived at postcode and asked for house number all went silent and messages were not read even though the couple was on line for 20 more minutes! "
Yes. But only a couple of times one was horrific. It was about 8 years ago.
I give you my experience as advice. I was conned by a couple who arranged for a hotel meet. I talked to him and his wife on the phone previously and agreed to meet in a hotel. I was very excited. When I arrived the guy bought me a pint and said his wife was waiting for me in the bedroom. He oddly looked at his phone at one point and apologised that his eyes were not good I realised later he must have photographed me. He asked can I spilt the hotel room bill, which seemed reasonable and I agreed. I gave him cash. He was very relaxed and said he wouldn’t be joining me but will wait in the lobby bar to see how I got on. He told me which room she was in and when I arrived there was no one there. I looked around the lobby and bar for the man. He had gone. I went to reception and asked about the room they said it was unoccupied. I looked them up on Fab and their account had disappeared.
I know I was foolish to trust this couple and so telling this story is not easy.
I hope my experience will help others. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does anyone else have multiple experiences of meets being arranged and then you travel to location to be ghosted and ignored when you get there? Last nite a meet was arranged and I told the couple I was leaving home and it would take 25 mins to get to Solihull then when I arrived at postcode and asked for house number all went silent and messages were not read even though the couple was on line for 20 more minutes!
Yes. But only a couple of times one was horrific. It was about 8 years ago.
I give you my experience as advice. I was conned by a couple who arranged for a hotel meet. I talked to him and his wife on the phone previously and agreed to meet in a hotel. I was very excited. When I arrived the guy bought me a pint and said his wife was waiting for me in the bedroom. He oddly looked at his phone at one point and apologised that his eyes were not good I realised later he must have photographed me. He asked can I spilt the hotel room bill, which seemed reasonable and I agreed. I gave him cash. He was very relaxed and said he wouldn’t be joining me but will wait in the lobby bar to see how I got on. He told me which room she was in and when I arrived there was no one there. I looked around the lobby and bar for the man. He had gone. I went to reception and asked about the room they said it was unoccupied. I looked them up on Fab and their account had disappeared.
I know I was foolish to trust this couple and so telling this story is not easy.
I hope my experience will help others. "
Omg that’s awful! |
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"Does anyone else have multiple experiences of meets being arranged and then you travel to location to be ghosted and ignored when you get there? Last nite a meet was arranged and I told the couple I was leaving home and it would take 25 mins to get to Solihull then when I arrived at postcode and asked for house number all went silent and messages were not read even though the couple was on line for 20 more minutes!
Yes. But only a couple of times one was horrific. It was about 8 years ago.
I give you my experience as advice. I was conned by a couple who arranged for a hotel meet. I talked to him and his wife on the phone previously and agreed to meet in a hotel. I was very excited. When I arrived the guy bought me a pint and said his wife was waiting for me in the bedroom. He oddly looked at his phone at one point and apologised that his eyes were not good I realised later he must have photographed me. He asked can I spilt the hotel room bill, which seemed reasonable and I agreed. I gave him cash. He was very relaxed and said he wouldn’t be joining me but will wait in the lobby bar to see how I got on. He told me which room she was in and when I arrived there was no one there. I looked around the lobby and bar for the man. He had gone. I went to reception and asked about the room they said it was unoccupied. I looked them up on Fab and their account had disappeared.
I know I was foolish to trust this couple and so telling this story is not easy.
I hope my experience will help others. "
Dude, that is super sh1tty! I'm sorry that you had to experience that. Thank you for sharing it though.
Best wishes |
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I’ll now only be giving postcode until people are parked up and then I’ll give the door number.
We arranged a few weeks back for a few guys to come round (one at a time) for a suck and go kind of afternoon as other half and I were in the mood for me to be covered in cum.
Organised 5 guys thinking 3 would hopefully turn up. All well verified. Spoke to them all. All asked to confirm the morning of the meet…
One just didn’t bother confirm or ever messaging again.
One confirmed at 2pm yet never showed up at 4 and never messaged again.
One messaged at 2 to confirm for 3 then messaged 2.45 to say was too nervous about bumping into other guys in the “queue”.
One was so late we ended up having to tell him to forget it.
One guy turned up on time as planned. |
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"All the time. Its got to the point now I fully expect to be ghosted on here.
Its sad, unnecessary, and more often than not a total waste of time money and effort.
In my case I even booked and paid for a hotel at her insistence only to be utterly gohsted when I got there. This has haplend with singles, and couples, alike.
All they had to do is say they changes their minds before I went to the effort.
Seriously thinkingnif giving up swinging as all its turned out to be full of fantasist and fakes.
You can only stay positive for so long
"
You have swingers clubs in your interests so instead of paying for a hotel meet at a club it's what I do and then if it's a no show always plenty more people to chat to so night is not a waste x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As single guys struggle to get even get a reply from their messages you think that if you’re lucky enough to get to the meeting stage that they would definitely turn up…….. but what possibly happens is that the single person isn’t exactly single and is trying to work this meeting around in secret or they do turn up for the meeting but it doesn’t match, not being anything like the ancient photos that was sent, So they ghost your messages. |
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