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Trying MMF for the first time
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Then in play rooms you dress down to lingerie or just be naked - whatever you feel comfortable in.
Not sure if a club would be the right setting for your first time with another guy or not. If you are nervous then you’ll have the nervousness of a club and not really knowing the guy.
Maybe find a guy and both chat to him and see if there’s a connection. Will hopefully make it easier then.
K | |||
"This maaaaaay be overly pedantic, but hopefully helpful? MMF implies the guys will be playing together, MFM implies no guy on guy. Its not so much unspoken, but definitely a distinction we didn't know about when we first had our threesome." Wow did not know this ! | |||
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"This maaaaaay be overly pedantic, but hopefully helpful? MMF implies the guys will be playing together, MFM implies no guy on guy. Its not so much unspoken, but definitely a distinction we didn't know about when we first had our threesome." Did not know this! Every day is a school day, thanks for sharing Mrs | |||
"This maaaaaay be overly pedantic, but hopefully helpful? MMF implies the guys will be playing together, MFM implies no guy on guy. Its not so much unspoken, but definitely a distinction we didn't know about when we first had our threesome. Wow did not know this !" Nor did we. Every day’s a school day! | |||
"OP you sound quite similar to us only we've not been together quite as long (12ish years) and we took that big step last weekend. We joined the site with the intention of having a nosy round and seeing how things felt and progressing further if we fancied it. We decided in the end that we'd go for an evening out, just the two of us, about an hour away from home and tack on a hotel stay as well to allow for the opportunity for naughtiness if we decided to. Got chatting more seriously to a couple of guys, swapped pics and started talking about things we'd like to try. At that point, one just left the site without word leaving the second guy happy to step up. We told him the plans, he was verified, saying all the right things so we sorted a venue to meet for a brief drink first to ensure we were all happy before hopefully heading back to the hotel. On the day of the arranged meet the second guy just ghosted us. Undeterred we went out and had a lovely evening with some food and drinks and when we got back to the hotel, a little tipsy, decided to post a 'meet now'. We had a flurry of responses, and one very lovely guy was available and joined us for the end of the evening. We're very happy to have taken that step and haven't been able to take our hands off each other since. Like being horny teenagers again "Glad you were able to have a positive experience in the end. MFM is on our list, but finding reliable guys seems to be the challenge - I love it how you found someone at the last minute as well, gives us hope should anything not go to plan lol Mrs | |||
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" Glad you were able to have a positive experience in the end. MFM is on our list, but finding reliable guys seems to be the challenge - I love it how you found someone at the last minute as well, gives us hope should anything not go to plan lol Mrs " Thank you and yes, it all worked out well. To be fair, planning to tack it on to a night away together also meant even if we didn't manage to go through with it, we still had a lovely evening together  | |||
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"Ooooh that is good to know! Thank you! Yes we are after MFM! Lol " Well it appears it wasn't overly pedantic, but actually quite helpful. Fantastic, happy to be of some help. The only other thing I'd say to consider, is as this is something you're considering (and if you haven't already), discuss boundaries. What's acceptable and what you want to happen at the end of it (whether they stay and hang out, or go straight away etc). It's the little things that usually get forgotten, and always the little things that cause the problems. | |||
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"I'm engaged in a fully bisexual 3some and it's amazing, all of us pleasure each other " This is something we both enjoy too. In a MFM just relax and don't worry about who is touching who. | |||
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"OP you sound quite similar to us only we've not been together quite as long (12ish years) and we took that big step last weekend. We joined the site with the intention of having a nosy round and seeing how things felt and progressing further if we fancied it. Thought it was just us single men that got stood up, ad it happen several times, that or just ghosted We decided in the end that we'd go for an evening out, just the two of us, about an hour away from home and tack on a hotel stay as well to allow for the opportunity for naughtiness if we decided to. Got chatting more seriously to a couple of guys, swapped pics and started talking about things we'd like to try. At that point, one just left the site without word leaving the second guy happy to step up. We told him the plans, he was verified, saying all the right things so we sorted a venue to meet for a brief drink first to ensure we were all happy before hopefully heading back to the hotel. On the day of the arranged meet the second guy just ghosted us. Undeterred we went out and had a lovely evening with some food and drinks and when we got back to the hotel, a little tipsy, decided to post a 'meet now'. We had a flurry of responses, and one very lovely guy was available and joined us for the end of the evening. We're very happy to have taken that step and haven't been able to take our hands off each other since. Like being horny teenagers again
Glad you were able to have a positive experience in the end. MFM is on our list, but finding reliable guys seems to be the challenge - I love it how you found someone at the last minute as well, gives us hope should anything not go to plan lol
Mrs " | |||
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" Glad you were able to have a positive experience in the end. MFM is on our list, but finding reliable guys seems to be the challenge - I love it how you found someone at the last minute as well, gives us hope should anything not go to plan lol Mrs Thank you and yes, it all worked out well. To be fair, planning to tack it on to a night away together also meant even if we didn't manage to go through with it, we still had a lovely evening together "This is our approach to meets anyway since we live in the middle of nowhere - even it if it doesn’t work out, then we would have a night away together Mrs | |||
"From a guys perspective on MFM, I prefer to get to know a couple first, usually over a few drinks without any expectations. A social meet is exciting with the advantage of being able to chat about what you do and don't like, where your boundaries are, things that you would like to explore etc. it also gives you chance to walk away if any of you are not happy. My unspoken rules are: treat with respect, make sure everyone is happy, read the dynamics of the couple, and always ask - don't assume. " This is how we prefer to do things - the social aspect is important to us for the exact same reasons you state. Everyone’s boundaries and pleasure is important to ensure it’s fun for everyone Mrs | |||
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"This maaaaaay be overly pedantic, but hopefully helpful? MMF implies the guys will be playing together, MFM implies no guy on guy. Its not so much unspoken, but definitely a distinction we didn't know about when we first had our threesome." It's also not true. For anyone that says it is please describe a 3 M and 1 F foursome where all the guys are straight using just the initials. MMF and MFM mean exactly the same thing, if the guys are bi it's a bi-MMF (or bi -MFM) | |||
"My husband and I have been together for over 20 years and we are toying with the idea of introducing another guy to spice things up. We’ve played around on cam for years but it’s never gone further than that. It’s a big step. Not sure if we should try visiting a club first before we do anything, just to get a flavour of things. What do people wear to a club? What are people’s experience of MMF? Are there any unspoken rules I need to know about. Any support and advice appreciated. " Hey! Never been in a couple for this but have joined them and asked. 1st - both want to do it. Really! Have a deep open chat about if you're both fully in and what boundaries you want to set if any! 2 - I'd just find a sexy localish man here! Have some flirts, then if it gets more real let the guy know what you want as a couple with boundaries included. No point getting excited because you never know the guy may decline! 3) meet outside bedroom first! If you aren't feeling it, be honest I would say. I know a lot of guys get broken egos but to be honest I would say those guys are dicks not worth bothering with anyway! 4) then just go and have fun. 1 couple I joined had a safeword not for extreme play to stop, but one if I was doing anything they didn't like - and either man or woman could say it. | |||
"Personally, we visited our first club this year after being in the lifestyle for several years & still found it a bit intimidating. Our advice for your first MFM would be find someone you are both comfortable with, meet socially first and when the time comes, choose neutral ground, like a hotel. That way if either party gets cold feet they can just leave and no harm done.x" Pretty solid advice. Having the social especially is perfect because you can check how everyone is gelling (or not), and I find it's good for my excitement rising as unfortunately IME two men often start going too fast too hard once we're in private and naked 
OP I'm a bit jealous of you, there are so many wonderful willing men to pick from, and you can call the shots! So try to firm up between you what sort of experience you are after, how does your fantasy mfm play out? What does she want to experience, what does he want to experience? What kind of thing you definitely wouldn't want? Is he ok watching you with another man (kinda inevitable even when tag teaming), or would it be better for the man joining you to be doing the watching? Do you want to keep it soft/no PIV or do you want to go for DP? Do you want a man who will take control of the action or who would follow your direction? At what kind of level of doubt or discomfort is it ok to "eject"? Would you rather go with a man who has experience in joining couples or prefer to meet with someone exploring this with you for the first time?
At the most basic of it just pick someone you like the look of and go for a drink start small, go slow, have fun! | |||
"We have had a few mfm which have been fun. Best thing is to keep an open mind and have fun respectfully "No, don't bullshit these people. The mfm meets we've had as a couple so far were shit and we were both disappointed. | |||
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"We have had a few mfm which have been fun. Best thing is to keep an open mind and have fun respectfully
No, don't bullshit these people. The mfm meets we've had as a couple so far were shit and we were both disappointed. "Your personal experiences may not be what the OP will experience. As an antidote to your comment our meets have been great fun so far and we plan to continue. | |||
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"We have had a few mfm which have been fun. Best thing is to keep an open mind and have fun respectfully
No, don't bullshit these people. The mfm meets we've had as a couple so far were shit and we were both disappointed. "How comes what did you find disappointing | |||
"We have had a few mfm which have been fun. Best thing is to keep an open mind and have fun respectfully
No, don't bullshit these people. The mfm meets we've had as a couple so far were shit and we were both disappointed.
How comes what did you find disappointing "The guys did very little to please me, no oral, a few squeezes here and there and just straight to fucking. One guy hurt me and my fwb did nothing but watch it happen, I was hoping to feel safe and looked after during a mfm meet with him but this was not the case. A couple of guys lasted about 3 minutes and it was all over. Was fun for the guys, they got to fuck, cum and have an amazing Bj, I got very little in return. None of the guys including my fwb stepped up to make sure I had just as good a time as they did. I was completely underwhelmed and left horny and frustrated after each meet. Hence why we've only had four so far and not met again yet. Sorry Lee, for airing this laundry but despite me telling you otherwise, you thought we had "fun". | |||
"We have had a few mfm which have been fun. Best thing is to keep an open mind and have fun respectfully
No, don't bullshit these people. The mfm meets we've had as a couple so far were shit and we were both disappointed.
Your personal experiences may not be what the OP will experience.
As an antidote to your comment our meets have been great fun so far and we plan to continue. "Completely understand this, however i didn't want my fwb to paint the meets we've had as good when they weren't. I'm hoping we have some good meets in the future, I've not lost hope but we may need to change our selection process. | |||
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"We have had a few mfm which have been fun. Best thing is to keep an open mind and have fun respectfully
No, don't bullshit these people. The mfm meets we've had as a couple so far were shit and we were both disappointed.
How comes what did you find disappointing
The guys did very little to please me, no oral, a few squeezes here and there and just straight to fucking. One guy hurt me and my fwb did nothing but watch it happen, I was hoping to feel safe and looked after during a mfm meet with him but this was not the case. A couple of guys lasted about 3 minutes and it was all over. Was fun for the guys, they got to fuck, cum and have an amazing Bj, I got very little in return. None of the guys including my fwb stepped up to make sure I had just as good a time as they did. I was completely underwhelmed and left horny and frustrated after each meet. Hence why we've only had four so far and not met again yet. Sorry Lee, for airing this laundry but despite me telling you otherwise, you thought we had "fun". "That’s not a good start then. Definitely met the wrong guys and your fwb probably needs to look at it also. Hopefully if you try it again you will find it the fun it should be. | |||
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"We have had a few mfm which have been fun. Best thing is to keep an open mind and have fun respectfully
No, don't bullshit these people. The mfm meets we've had as a couple so far were shit and we were both disappointed.
Your personal experiences may not be what the OP will experience.
As an antidote to your comment our meets have been great fun so far and we plan to continue.
Completely understand this, however i didn't want my fwb to paint the meets we've had as good when they weren't. I'm hoping we have some good meets in the future, I've not lost hope but we may need to change our selection process. "We’ve learned to only pick guys that have been previously verified by couples although we occasionally take a chance in a club setting. We had a couple of non starters in the early days that left Dora similarly frustrated but we have the advantage of me sorting her out properly when we got home. Hope your next encounter leaves you breathless and weak at the knees! | |||
"We have had a few mfm which have been fun. Best thing is to keep an open mind and have fun respectfully
No, don't bullshit these people. The mfm meets we've had as a couple so far were shit and we were both disappointed.
Your personal experiences may not be what the OP will experience.
As an antidote to your comment our meets have been great fun so far and we plan to continue.
Completely understand this, however i didn't want my fwb to paint the meets we've had as good when they weren't. I'm hoping we have some good meets in the future, I've not lost hope but we may need to change our selection process.
We’ve learned to only pick guys that have been previously verified by couples although we occasionally take a chance in a club setting.
We had a couple of non starters in the early days that left Dora similarly frustrated but we have the advantage of me sorting her out properly when we got home.
Hope your next encounter leaves you breathless and weak at the knees! "Fingers crossed! | |||
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"Wear something that makes you feel sexy in a club. Most clubs the bar area is you can wear anything…obviously something sexy…not a boiler suit and DM’s
Then in play rooms you dress down to lingerie or just be naked - whatever you feel comfortable in.
Not sure if a club would be the right setting for your first time with another guy or not. If you are nervous then you’ll have the nervousness of a club and not really knowing the guy.
Maybe find a guy and both chat to him and see if there’s a connection. Will hopefully make it easier then.
K"I think this advice is spot on, particularly the point about whether a club is the best place for your first time, although I do understand some people are more comfortable at a club than inviting someone to their home. I also didn't know the MMF v MFM thingy so we are all learning thanks to your post!! All the best in your quest | |||
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"So in terms of mmf or mfm - it is only in last few years that mmf is said to be guy and guy and woman watching then joining In, with mfm being two guys pleasuring a lady who are both straight Like people say if you said bi mmf people know Going back to the location for first mmf - I would it depends. A club would be good idea if you get ghosted or you don’t like the look at Keats other options " I never know if the MFM vs MMF thing is true. But there’s no distinction for MFF. Everyone just assumes the women will interact. Personally I’m only into guys so if I found myself in the vicinity of another woman it’d be a FMF. Tag teaming a guy. | |||
"So in terms of mmf or mfm - it is only in last few years that mmf is said to be guy and guy and woman watching then joining In, with mfm being two guys pleasuring a lady who are both straight Like people say if you said bi mmf people know Going back to the location for first mmf - I would it depends. A club would be good idea if you get ghosted or you don’t like the look at Keats other options I never know if the MFM vs MMF thing is true. But there’s no distinction for MFF. Everyone just assumes the women will interact. Personally I’m only into guys so if I found myself in the vicinity of another woman it’d be a FMF. Tag teaming a guy. " It kinda is but isn’t if that makes sense - if I saw mmf in a non swinging context then I think it means really mfm, I think our world it distinguishes between straight and non straight | |||
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"This maaaaaay be overly pedantic, but hopefully helpful? MMF implies the guys will be playing together, MFM implies no guy on guy. Its not so much unspoken, but definitely a distinction we didn't know about when we first had our threesome." who knew?
How did we not know this lol
Curls x | |||
"So in terms of mmf or mfm - it is only in last few years that mmf is said to be guy and guy and woman watching then joining In, with mfm being two guys pleasuring a lady who are both straight Like people say if you said bi mmf people know Going back to the location for first mmf - I would it depends. A club would be good idea if you get ghosted or you don’t like the look at Keats other options I never know if the MFM vs MMF thing is true. But there’s no distinction for MFF. Everyone just assumes the women will interact. Personally I’m only into guys so if I found myself in the vicinity of another woman it’d be a FMF. Tag teaming a guy. " You're right, in the "past" all mmf were straight and all mff were bi (it was the rules lolol), I remember someone on a different forum a few years back suggesting mmf meant a bi threesome and getting shot down. But ordering the letters to communicate this has been gaining traction - evidence on this thread! - I think probably because many more men are looking to explore their attraction to men and many women are moving away from performative lesbo action? And yes def seen FMF to mean a straight threesome, rarest of threesomes though! | |||
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"This maaaaaay be overly pedantic, but hopefully helpful? MMF implies the guys will be playing together, MFM implies no guy on guy. Its not so much unspoken, but definitely a distinction we didn't know about when we first had our threesome. Wow did not know this !" Don't worry. It isn't true. What you decide between the three of you defines the play, not the order of the letters. | |||
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"This maaaaaay be overly pedantic, but hopefully helpful? MMF implies the guys will be playing together, MFM implies no guy on guy. Its not so much unspoken, but definitely a distinction we didn't know about when we first had our threesome. Wow did not know this ! Don't worry. It isn't true. What you decide between the three of you defines the play, not the order of the letters." I didn't say it was a hard and fast rule, just that it implies. Like most things it's a guide that some people find handy and for others it's completely irrelevant. Both are legit. | |||
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"OP you sound quite similar to us only we've not been together quite as long (12ish years) and we took that big step last weekend. We joined the site with the intention of having a nosy round and seeing how things felt and progressing further if we fancied it. We decided in the end that we'd go for an evening out, just the two of us, about an hour away from home and tack on a hotel stay as well to allow for the opportunity for naughtiness if we decided to. Got chatting more seriously to a couple of guys, swapped pics and started talking about things we'd like to try. At that point, one just left the site without word leaving the second guy happy to step up. We told him the plans, he was verified, saying all the right things so we sorted a venue to meet for a brief drink first to ensure we were all happy before hopefully heading back to the hotel. On the day of the arranged meet the second guy just ghosted us. Undeterred we went out and had a lovely evening with some food and drinks and when we got back to the hotel, a little tipsy, decided to post a 'meet now'. We had a flurry of responses, and one very lovely guy was available and joined us for the end of the evening. We're very happy to have taken that step and haven't been able to take our hands off each other since. Like being horny teenagers again "That's very similar to how I got my first MFM meet from here, there was a couple staying at a hotel in town, I saw that they were nearby, Fabbed one of their photos and they messaged me asking if I wanted to join them. Very spur of the moment and I just went for it. That was a good day for me  | |||
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"This maaaaaay be overly pedantic, but hopefully helpful? MMF implies the guys will be playing together, MFM implies no guy on guy. Its not so much unspoken, but definitely a distinction we didn't know about when we first had our threesome. Wow did not know this !" You learn something new every day, and I’ve definitely been giving the wrong impression of my past experiences lol | |||
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