FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Bit of stage fright.....
Bit of stage fright.....
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By (user no longer on site) OP 45 weeks ago
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Okay, so only been to three club nights so far and finally plucked up the courage to join in a orgy. Only problem was I'd never done this before and although everything was really sexy I got a bit nervous "performing" infront of so many people, think you guys can figure out the rest... I kinda laughed it off and we sneaked off into a private room later in the night. Have anyone else ever had this? I'm a bit of a rookie in the scene and just learning more than anything. Had an amazing evening it's just that one time where I was in front of so many people and I kinda shut down! Happy Fabbing!! |
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Anyone can get a "stage fright", particularly if you have never done an orgy before. That's one of the reasons there isn't actually that much full fucking happening in clubs that often. A lot of the times, it would mostly be "soft play", then, eventually, at the end of the night, there would be some full sex, with the man cumming. The thing is, not many men are repeaters. Most can cum once, and their night is over, so they almost keep it to the last minute. And I have seen a lot of men struggle to maintain erection in clubs, despite a very sexual environment there. So OP, try not to worry too much about it. |
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By (user no longer on site) 45 weeks ago
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Very common and not just in clubs. Go in with the goal of enjoying fingers and mouths with a stretch accomplishment of an erection and cumming as a golden buzz award  |
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I think a lot of guys have had the same experience as you, OP, including myself. The difficulty isn't the ‘falling off the horse’ as I call it, but the ‘getting back on’. However, just try not to overthink it and I'm sure you'll be back in the saddle in no time!   |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 45 weeks ago
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Many thanks guys!! Well I almost expected that I wouldn't be going at it all stallion like and going off like Mount versuvius, I had a giggle about it, she genuinely didn't mind she was really nice about it, told me I won't get away that easy, and we met up again privately and there was no problems! I think the other men in the room weren't exactly assessing my own performance to be fair. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 45 weeks ago
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"Very common and not just in clubs. Go in with the goal of enjoying fingers and mouths with a stretch accomplishment of an erection and cumming as a golden buzz award "
Love this advice! I do enjoy oral and using my hands and mouth very much so that's just as sexual an experience for me, it's not all about my cock lol |
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It happens…
It happened to me recently - the Libs big playroom was packed - in addition to those on beds there were about 30 people around the playroom watching (waiting for a space!) - the couple I was with wanted some ‘unusual’ threeway action and then I heard a running commentary and discussion about me from a group of observers behind, then I looked up and practically the whole playroom was watching…  That was it, defaulted to limp mode. It took about 5 minutes to have a word with myself and get back on that pony..
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Dont worry about it OP at all, you went to a private room and you both still enjoyed your night.I prefer the intimacy of private room play after a similar thing a long time ago so it happens frequently. From then on i accepted thats just the way I am. |
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By (user no longer on site) 45 weeks ago
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Very good thread OP
This is something that no doubt puts people off going to clubs, so to hear it happens is a relief, especially hearing ladies arnt too bothered. |
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"Very good thread OP
This is something that no doubt puts people off going to clubs, so to hear it happens is a relief, especially hearing ladies arnt too bothered. "
Ive had the pleasure of cuckold and it was quite the opposite, such a turn on I was hard for ages , but I do understand how it may be daunting but shit happens and you just try your best |
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By *ickD80Man 45 weeks ago
Wolverhampton |
So did you get up and walk away or carry on? It sounds as though you walked away from the orgy but I’m wondering why you’d do that when there are plenty of ways you could have got involved and had some fun without using your cock. I’d have been happy to stay there and just given oral or have my ass hole used. |
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"I think a lot of guys have had the same experience as you, OP, including myself. The difficulty isn't the ‘falling off the horse’ as I call it, but the ‘getting back on’. However, just try not to overthink it and I'm sure you'll be back in the saddle in no time! "
Good advice. Now in the past i was ok at a 4 lady gangbang but then i have lost the hard in a cpl swap/3some meet for no apparent reason although joanne thinks i over thought thinks and pressured myself to perform,later in i was going at it with no problems. Sometimes us men over pressure ourselves to perform thinking we are going to let the ladies down when infact most ladies are fine that these things happen. Just switch tactics until you calm down nearly every man out there has had this happen at some point buddy. John. |
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By (user no longer on site) 45 weeks ago
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I think most blokes experience this at some point! Thankfully the ladies seem to completely understand and when it’s happened to me previously, I’ve never been made to feel embarrassed.
Just relax and then go again! You’ll find the nerves go pretty quick after another visit or two 
Mr |
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Stage fright and the resultant lack of performance is, for me, brought on by the introduction of condoms. I cannot stand the smell of them and therefore being an advocate of safe sex I have to content myself with no penetrative sex. |
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I had a similar experience at a club recently. Didn't have the problem with the erection that was ok. My issue was and has always been not being able to relax enough to climax.
I used to get like it when we first started having MFM threesomes. This was our first time in a club and the first time back in the lifestyle after a lengthy break. There was a guy watching which turned out Mrs enjoyed a lot more than I thought she would but I just couldn't get there.
Maybe not quite the same but it is a form of stage fright and it effects us all in different ways. It's good to talk about it and well done OP for opening up. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 45 weeks ago
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"So did you get up and walk away or carry on? It sounds as though you walked away from the orgy but I’m wondering why you’d do that when there are plenty of ways you could have got involved and had some fun without using your cock. I’d have been happy to stay there and just given oral or have my ass hole used. "
Well I went to default oral bit of nipple play some biting it was still very enjoyable |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 45 weeks ago
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"This is what worries me about meets, even though I only want to watch I would expect they would like to see what it does to me and that where those thoughts creep in…"
I totally get that, and I figured that if everyone had that thought noone would get anywhere! The impression I got genuinely was that everyone especially in a situation like a gangbang room, is so conscious of their own stuff that they don't give a crap about what's going on with you |
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By *MrMrsXCouple 45 weeks ago
Hereford |
So as the male half of a couple I have struggled myself.
I have sat there while loving what's going on around me and too me but sometimes it just doesn't happen. Personally I overthink it and that in turn puts so much pressure on it won't work.
My way over that is to take a viagra when we know something is going to happen eg. On way to a club this gives me that confidence boost to not over think and perform. Xx |
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"This is what worries me about meets, even though I only want to watch I would expect they would like to see what it does to me and that where those thoughts creep in…
I totally get that, and I figured that if everyone had that thought noone would get anywhere! The impression I got genuinely was that everyone especially in a situation like a gangbang room, is so conscious of their own stuff that they don't give a crap about what's going on with you "
Good reasoning!! |
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