So after a rather “busy” weekend of fun (very enjoyable, I hasten to add!) I have spent most of today feeling a little out of sorts, a bit down and similar to how I feel after an intense bdsm scene if I go through sub drop.
Hmm I thought - is swinging drop a thing? A quick Google later and seems it is - which has helped on one hand cos it explains why I don’t feel great but now I have the dilemma of not having prepped my usual sub drop “care package” to myself and really not having the motivation or energy to do it now.
Please share if this is something you experience and how you deal with it. Think even just talking would help to be honest. And any easy things to help me feel better. Going to run a bath and probably watch a movie. |
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We definatley experience a weird subdued feeling the day after night of swinging fun, we think it's the excited build up to it that once it's passed leaves us feeling lethargic, a but sore and worn out. |
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First of all - Hugs.
I think a low can naturally follow a high,whatever causes the high. That's just your body compensating. Recognising it for what it is, is half the battle.
Combat it by doing things that you enjoy what ever they are, how you would normally self soothe/ self regulate.
For me it's things like self care, self tlc, talking it out to friends or family, music & dancing, or movies & food. I'm not great at it sometimes, but I also try not to beat myself up about it, I just let myself wallow for 5 then try to distract myself.
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"We definatley experience a weird subdued feeling the day after night of swinging fun, we think it's the excited build up to it that once it's passed leaves us feeling lethargic, a but sore and worn out."
Good you have each other though! That probably helps a bit x  |
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"First of all - Hugs.
I think a low can naturally follow a high,whatever causes the high. That's just your body compensating. Recognising it for what it is, is half the battle.
Combat it by doing things that you enjoy what ever they are, how you would normally self soothe/ self regulate.
For me it's things like self care, self tlc, talking it out to friends or family, music & dancing, or movies & food. I'm not great at it sometimes, but I also try not to beat myself up about it, I just let myself wallow for 5 then try to distract myself.
"
Thank you so much, appreciate the hugs and the good advice |
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Definitely a thing!
A experiences it quite hard. It's like for him the swinging environment is very hyper stimulating and so there's that come down afterwards that can linger a day or two.
But your doing all the right things. A bath, film, whatever you'd do for after a BDSM scene perhaps?
But most importantly..... Big hugs OP  |
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"Definitely a thing!
A experiences it quite hard. It's like for him the swinging environment is very hyper stimulating and so there's that come down afterwards that can linger a day or two.
But your doing all the right things. A bath, film, whatever you'd do for after a BDSM scene perhaps?
But most importantly..... Big hugs OP "
A wee chilled evening in the bath and an early night for me I think. So glad I bought pizza for my dinner  thank you for the hugs x |
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Yep, I’m feeling this today. If I’ve had a fun evening my serotonin levels feel a bit depleted the next day. I try to keep the day after a meet free to just chill and do nothing. Eat well, fresh fruit and veggies, stay hydrated, maybe go for a walk, or have a long soak in the bath. Lots of self love, always be kind to yourself x
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Thank you so much everyone - chatting here helped immensely. Had a bath, watched Schitts Creek, had my pizza and an early night - feel great today! And how I know in future… make sure my aftercare is ready for me! |
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Yes it's definitely a thing !. Can be experienced differently by each half of a couple too. In general we come out happy the other side and look forward repeating the experience asap, yet on occasion if one or both of us are treated badly or simply ignored it can be a right downer. For a single there's the stark contrast between incredible affection and then getting home to an empty house too... you are not alone OP. |
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"For a single there's the stark contrast between incredible affection and then getting home to an empty house too... you are not alone OP."
Absolutely think this is part of it for sure. Need a cuddle buddy… The cat tried his best
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I’ve only experienced a ‘drop’ after club visits? And that’s only because I’ve built up the excitement too much beforehand, to then have a crap night on the night (clubs aren’t great as a solo guy), so I counter this by rarely going to clubs.
I can’t say I’ve ever had a drop after a private meet, even the following day, when you have the flashbacks. It’s more a case of planning the next time…  |
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"I’ve only experienced a ‘drop’ after club visits? And that’s only because I’ve built up the excitement too much beforehand, to then have a crap night on the night (clubs aren’t great as a solo guy), so I counter this by rarely going to clubs.
I can’t say I’ve ever had a drop after a private meet, even the following day, when you have the flashbacks. It’s more a case of planning the next time… "
That's not really comparing the same situation. What you are describing is merely a regret of a disappointing night.
A 'drop' is something completely different. |
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As a couple, we do experience some of the feelings you describe, both physically and mentally. The following day, however, is always a flurry of activity for us with the children in a Sunday, or with work/schools in Monday if we met on a Sunday, so we kind of bottle the feelings up. Being busy takes your mind out of what happened the day before. |
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By *r-MrsXCouple 7 weeks ago
Edinburgh |
"So after a rather “busy” weekend of fun (very enjoyable, I hasten to add!) I have spent most of today feeling a little out of sorts, a bit down and similar to how I feel after an intense bdsm scene if I go through sub drop.
Hmm I thought - is swinging drop a thing? A quick Google later and seems it is - which has helped on one hand cos it explains why I don’t feel great but now I have the dilemma of not having prepped my usual sub drop “care package” to myself and really not having the motivation or energy to do it now.
Please share if this is something you experience and how you deal with it. Think even just talking would help to be honest. And any easy things to help me feel better. Going to run a bath and probably watch a movie. "
As the female part of a couple, I have experienced this. I think for us it’s the nerves of a build up and then tiredness/slight disappointment. Could it be you feel down after a BDSM sub meet because it’s not really for you and you need more care and affection? I couldn’t go through this type of sex as I’d just feel like a man’s play thing and would feel used and abused. Each to their own though. Everyone’s likes/dislikes are unique to them and no judgement.
Take care of yourself OP, rest, reassess what you want and only allow others to treat you well. |
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