FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Is asking for a social that much
Is asking for a social that much
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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We don't advertise on our profile that we meet single guys. That doesn't mean we don't ever have the need for them when C is feeling greedy...is it to much to ask for a guy to join us for a social before we invite them to the club |
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By *ushy 99Man
over a year ago
somewhere nearby |
"We don't advertise on our profile that we meet single guys. That doesn't mean we don't ever have the need for them when C is feeling greedy...is it to much to ask for a guy to join us for a social before we invite them to the club"
Not at all.. completely understandable to meet the guy before initiating anything! |
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"We don't advertise on our profile that we meet single guys. That doesn't mean we don't ever have the need for them when C is feeling greedy...is it to much to ask for a guy to join us for a social before we invite them to the club"
Not at all! Far better to meet for a social in a coffee shop or a pub, than go to the expense of a club! Add to that the possibility of being ‘abandoned’ in a generally unwelcoming club environment (if you’ve ever been a single guy in a swingers’ club you’ll know what I mean), if you don’t all get on  |
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We pretty much always meet for a social first.
If the guys not willing to make some effort for a no pressure Social then we’re generally not interested.
Call us selfish or vain but we need an attraction to the person we’re thinking of playing with, and that usually only happens after a social.
We also find that as soon as we mention a social before play half the guys we’re talking to go quiet... funny that! |
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"We pretty much always meet for a social first.
If the guys not willing to make some effort for a no pressure Social then we’re generally not interested.
Call us selfish or vain but we need an attraction to the person we’re thinking of playing with, and that usually only happens after a social.
We also find that as soon as we mention a social before play half the guys we’re talking to go quiet... funny that!"
We've never had a man turn down a social meet. |
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Originally we were not interested in socials whats so ever, we had both agreed we just wanted an extra dick and that was all.
Initially Babygirl didn't want anything to do with the selection of the guy but i would send her occasional screenshots of conversation i was having and she has become more interested.
After having no luck setting up the kind of anonymous meets we wanted i suggested we meet potential guys for a drinks first.
She said she would feel really uncomfortable with a guy flirting with her and it feeling like a date. She's all down for the sex but not the social side, even if i had said it was ok.
So we have settled on her selecting the guys she finds attractive and me meeting them for a drink to get a feel for them.
As we like the idea of a guy in his 20's we are mostly talking to guys with no verifications.
I know we would have more luck talking to older guys but they just dont do it for Babygirl. She calls me an old man and I'm not even 40 ffs 
We are probably limiting ourselves even further by asking them to meet only the male for a social first, but the way we look at it is this, if I'm going to share my gorgeous wife with you, your going to have to make an effort.
I reckon if I meet a guy for a drink I would know very quickly if he was the right guy for us |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would have thought that a social would benefit both.
I would always accept a social first if offered.
If they are saying no, then it would make me think something is up! |
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"We don't advertise on our profile that we meet single guys. That doesn't mean we don't ever have the need for them when C is feeling greedy...is it to much to ask for a guy to join us for a social before we invite them to the club"
I would prefer asocial first |
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"We don't advertise on our profile that we meet single guys. That doesn't mean we don't ever have the need for them when C is feeling greedy...is it to much to ask for a guy to join us for a social before we invite them to the club"
Not at all ...socials are v important to see if you both like & show attraction ...if a guy wont meet this way its his loss ..plenty on here who will |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We don't advertise on our profile that we meet single guys. That doesn't mean we don't ever have the need for them when C is feeling greedy...is it to much to ask for a guy to join us for a social before we invite them to the clubNot at all ...socials are v important to see if you both like & show attraction ...if a guy wont meet this way its his loss ..plenty on here who will "
Exactly, theres only so much you can tell from a profile and pics... personality is important too |
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
When mentoring people in the BDSM scene, I always suggest they ask prospective play partners several questions, one of which is “would you be prepared to meet in a social setting without any expectation of play?”
If the person declines, then it is likely they either are not serious or could be a dangerous play mate.
While sexual meets do not necessarily carry the same risks as a BDSM session, for me the principle still stands. Unwilling to meet for a social should be a Red Flag.
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Meeting for a social especially with local guys is a good way of rooting out the married guys and people in long term relationships because they don't want to be seen in public and it definitely helps everyone relax |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A social should be the only thing people are thinking of during this crisis. Albeit bubbles and the potential of forming bubbles.
Majority of current statuses of guys (seen on my updates) are asking for sex from the off. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We don't advertise on our profile that we meet single guys. That doesn't mean we don't ever have the need for them when C is feeling greedy...is it to much to ask for a guy to join us for a social before we invite them to the club"
No not at all. Ofcourse not everyone will be want what you want, so bear that in mind. Personally I prefer a social, especially when meeting a couple for the first time |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When mentoring people in the BDSM scene, I always suggest they ask prospective play partners several questions, one of which is “would you be prepared to meet in a social setting without any expectation of play?”
If the person declines, then it is likely they either are not serious or could be a dangerous play mate.
While sexual meets do not necessarily carry the same risks as a BDSM session, for me the principle still stands. Unwilling to meet for a social should be a Red Flag.
"
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I always meet for a social first.
I've been in the BDSM scene longer than the swinging scene and there are a lot more risks to consider when meeting for the BDSM side of things. But...You can judge someone better in person than you can online, so even if it is just for sex, I like to meet for a drink and have a face to face conversation with them.
Sometimes I find that even if I'm attracted to them looks wise, their personality can put me off. They could look like Brad Pitt, but if I don't click with them, I couldn't get naked with them.
If they are unwilling to meet for a social only, I wouldn't meet them. It's that simple.
I've made some bad judgement calls in the past, and have been fairly lucky considering, so I do what I can to limit the risks now.
If all goes well, then it's full steam ahead planning the second meet  |
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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago
Calderdale innit |
Deffo not,
You have to gage the attraction ans that you all get on well, before deciding to take it further
If someone can't even agree to that, just move on, that's what I do.
I've had a few men go quiet when i was meeting and said it's a social first only. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We don't advertise on our profile that we meet single guys. That doesn't mean we don't ever have the need for them when C is feeling greedy...is it to much to ask for a guy to join us for a social before we invite them to the club"
I would always insist on a social before anything. It’s a good way of breaking the ice and seeing if there is a connection. I need to be able to trust both partners before anything as occasionally in clubs, a lady has invited me to her table only to be told to leave by her male partner. If no spark then all can leave in a dignified manner. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I personally like a first meet to be social on mutual understanding there has to be mutual attraction of personality, humour and sex appeal. If all are happy and wish to go further fine, but a single guy should be prepared to invest time to have pleasure with someones Lady.
Your looks are stunning very photogenic and sexy as mm Love to paint you x |
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We always have a social meet first for any potential playmates. We can't just play without some form of connection. Especially if we are considering solo play with her and the other person then we would both meet them socially first and take it from there. If they didn't want to do that then would be a no go from start. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If the single guy doesn't want a social and its important to you then clearly he's not the right guy for you. Just helps with the process of finding the right guys."
100% This.
Jo.Xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If the single guy doesn't want a social and its important to you then clearly he's not the right guy for you. Just helps with the process of finding the right guys."
Totally agree - this goes for anyone that doesn't meet your preferences to be honest |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We would always want a social first as someone said earlier there has to be an attraction
If the guy does not want a social that’s his loss"
It's not his loss. It's both party's gain.
They are not compatible and no time was wasted. |
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By *ondonerMan
over a year ago
London / Essex borders |
"We've never had a problem with single guys not wanting to do a social. The ones we are interested in are always happy with that and are aware there will be no play on the social x"
Exactly this - as a single guy, I'm acutely aware of the odds on here, and if a couple want to meet, I'm always happy to play on their terms, be that a social, cam or phone chat first |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I tend to do socials at either mine or there house have a brew and a chat see how we get on If things go well they progress if not we go our seperate ways it's amazing how many people look nothing like there pictures or 5 stone heavier |
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"We don't advertise on our profile that we meet single guys. That doesn't mean we don't ever have the need for them when C is feeling greedy...is it to much to ask for a guy to join us for a social before we invite them to the club"
Not at all, I see it as quite normal and have absolutely no problem with it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We don't advertise on our profile that we meet single guys. That doesn't mean we don't ever have the need for them when C is feeling greedy...is it to much to ask for a guy to join us for a social before we invite them to the club"
No not at all..I think that’s perfectly fine..as the social works for both party’s involved.., |
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