We've been talking about going to a club. But we don't want to go to our local one due to the higher risk of bumping into colleagues or worst case scenario, a family member.
Do you find many people travel out of town for clubs? |
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By *bi HaiveMan 6 weeks ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"We've been talking about going to a club. But we don't want to go to our local one due to the higher risk of bumping into colleagues or worst case scenario, a family member.
Do you find many people travel out of town for clubs?"
I went into the closest club to home once. Left after about 20 minutes. 🤦♂️🤷♂️😂
I've been a member at Xtasia (100 miles away from home) since 2012. I've been to clubs much further away and frequently make trips of around 1 1/2 to 2 hours. Or longer. Even did Mystique in Tenerife in January.
A good road trip to a club is part of the fun. Some clubs even allow non locals to make a one off trip without paying for membership that you'll never use. One of my partners and some friends of hours are looking at heading to Liverpool later this year and that's a 4 hour each way drive. 😁 |
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"Some people go to a local club, some travel. The chances of seeing someone you know is slim, though possible. If you do so what? Just laugh it off, you're there for the same reason. "
That's well and good if those people can be relied on for discretion...that's not always the case. Some people just dont get the etiquette |
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"Some people go to a local club, some travel. The chances of seeing someone you know is slim, though possible. If you do so what? Just laugh it off, you're there for the same reason.
That's well and good if those people can be relied on for discretion...that's not always the case. Some people just dont get the etiquette"
But don't they also have "something to lose" if there "exposed" as swingers 💀 |
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"Some people go to a local club, some travel. The chances of seeing someone you know is slim, though possible. If you do so what? Just laugh it off, you're there for the same reason.
That's well and good if those people can be relied on for discretion...that's not always the case. Some people just dont get the etiquette
But don't they also have "something to lose" if there "exposed" as swingers 💀"
Not everybody no...some people are very open about their activity and think everyone else should be too, some don't care about other people's needs... |
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"Some people go to a local club, some travel. The chances of seeing someone you know is slim, though possible. If you do so what? Just laugh it off, you're there for the same reason.
That's well and good if those people can be relied on for discretion...that's not always the case. Some people just dont get the etiquette
But don't they also have "something to lose" if there "exposed" as swingers 💀"
I work with the public and my work place is very big on what you do outside the workplace reflects on them. If I bumped into one of the clients from my work place they may have nothing to lose but I could lose my job if it got back to my managers. |
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By *bi HaiveMan 6 weeks ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"Some people go to a local club, some travel. The chances of seeing someone you know is slim, though possible. If you do so what? Just laugh it off, you're there for the same reason.
That's well and good if those people can be relied on for discretion...that's not always the case. Some people just dont get the etiquette
But don't they also have "something to lose" if there "exposed" as swingers 💀
I work with the public and my work place is very big on what you do outside the workplace reflects on them. If I bumped into one of the clients from my work place they may have nothing to lose but I could lose my job if it got back to my managers. "
Plausible deniability.
If your profile doesn't identify you then nobody can 'prove' you're on here. Likewise clubs don't allow phones/cameras. If a client outed you for attending a club how difficult would it be to just say 'nope, wasn't me!' 🤷♂️
Way back around 2010 I was outed at work to my company by someone I suspect I ejected from a club I helped host. They turned a screen and showed me my Fab profile. I just said it wasn't me. Nothing could be proven and there were no repercussions.
It would be a rare person that would go to a business they dealt with and said 'guess who i bumped into while I was out swinging last weekend......'. 🤔 |
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For us we wish for privacy and respect the privacy of others. But we can't guarantee others would respect that which is why we would be looking to consider clubs away from home. I imagine if we did see someone who knows us, they're not staying local for similar reasons. |
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Guilty!
This is exactly what we do! The thought of walking in & seeing someone we know would make us turn right around exclaiming “This isn’t a bloody trapeze school….!”
When we get more into the scene, we’ll see…. But right now - let’s find our way just a little.  |
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By *irsSubCouple 6 weeks ago
Darlington |
Our nearest club is 40 mins away, but we almost always head to Quest, which about an hour away because one of us grew up not far from the closest one. In all honesty it wouldn't make a difference if we bumped into someone we know, but we just prefer to minimise the risks. |
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Yes we've found this talking to many people over the years at clubs. However we also no a lot of people who happily use their local club. I think with swinging we all make our own risk assessment. For many the hassle of travelling the far flung corners is not worth the risk vs convenience (especially if you have a great club on your doorstep). It's not something we worry about and have very rarely bumped into people from our vanilla world. But it's no big deal. And considering many people (like ourselves) do like to get about a bit and try different clubs there's no guarantee you won't bump into some you know some distance away. After all there's not that many clubs, swinging is a small world and popular clubs/events drag people in from across the Country. However you manage the risk you always need to understand that one day you may bump into someone you know at clubs. That risk you can not full remove. |
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"Way back around 2010 I was outed at work to my company by someone I suspect I ejected from a club I helped host. They turned a screen and showed me my Fab profile. I just said it wasn't me. Nothing could be proven and there were no repercussions.
It would be a rare person that would go to a business they dealt with and said 'guess who i bumped into while I was out swinging last weekend......'. 🤔"
Friday morning interviewed a guy, he’d been through the entire recruitment process and I was the final hurdle; he was exactly what the business needed so by the end of play we’d hired him. I signed off my week by congratulating him over the phone and I’d look forward to seeing him again soon!
Shit, not that soon I thought, arriving at our local club in Manchester (I was a couple back then) and here he is sat on a stool at the bar; my GF at the time was behind the bar so I had no other choice but to front it out.
Shook his hand, he’s obviously as surprised as me! My GF looked surprised and once I explained she said “he’s an idiot, he won’t last a month”
Sure enough, a couple of weeks later he’s gone by Friday and I ended that week with my HR Director laughing in my office as she explained he’d “outed me” as a “disgusting swinger” during his dismissal.
I laughed it off with a nod, couple of weeks later here he was in the club again, wasn’t too pleased when the bouncer (a good mate of mine) showed him the exit; politely explaining that everyone is entitled to privacy and he wasn’t welcome anymore! |
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