I'm having a moment here and there around respecting peoples privacy.
I've only been here a few months, and this is my first adventure away from societal norms and traditional relationship rules.
I've been following the "don't kiss and tell" theory, then I worked out that anyone on the site can look you up, and know who you've been with from your verifications.
So when other fab users ask how it's going, who you're meeting with and such, is it ok to say "I've met with UserSmith and I'm now chatting with JoeBloggs1" and such?
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"I'm having a moment here and there around respecting peoples privacy.
I've only been here a few months, and this is my first adventure away from societal norms and traditional relationship rules.
I've been following the "don't kiss and tell" theory, then I worked out that anyone on the site can look you up, and know who you've been with from your verifications.
So when other fab users ask how it's going, who you're meeting with and such, is it ok to say "I've met with UserSmith and I'm now chatting with JoeBloggs1" and such?
"
What’s the benefit of that? Often people use those questions to flesh out whether you’re actually meeting or a fantasist. Depending on the time of day they also might just be using you as wank fodder.
Personally, I try to steer the conversation to something more interesting or block if it remains banal.
I hope you have a blast on here!
Xx |
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If people want to follow my veris that's up to them, the other person sent it so consented to their details being on my profile.
That being said I never discuss other people when messaging on here. What I do with others is nothing to do with the person I'm chatting to. |
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"
What’s the benefit of that? Often people use those questions to flesh out whether you’re actually meeting or a fantasist. Depending on the time of day they also might just be using you as wank fodder.
Personally, I try to steer the conversation to something more interesting or block if it remains banal.
I hope you have a blast on here!
Xx "
Thank you for replying.
So far I'm having a lot of fun. x |
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"If people want to follow my veris that's up to them, the other person sent it so consented to their details being on my profile.
That being said I never discuss other people when messaging on here. What I do with others is nothing to do with the person I'm chatting to. "
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"I'm having a moment here and there around respecting peoples privacy.
I've only been here a few months, and this is my first adventure away from societal norms and traditional relationship rules.
I've been following the "don't kiss and tell" theory, then I worked out that anyone on the site can look you up, and know who you've been with from your verifications.
So when other fab users ask how it's going, who you're meeting with and such, is it ok to say "I've met with UserSmith and I'm now chatting with JoeBloggs1" and such?
"
No I don't think it is. It's nobody else's business who you're meeting with and I think it's rude of people to ask.
We hid our verifications after someone assumed that because we'd met someone they knew we would also meet them.
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By *WB85Man 33 weeks ago
Staffordshire |
Its a pet hate of mine when people start talking of others they meet.
I hate verifications for tge same reason.
Its do easy for it to all feel sleazy....most dont agree with my opinion, but thats ok. |
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By *sm265Woman 33 weeks ago
Perthshire |
On a previous profile I had an ex who basically stalked my profile and messaged anyone who gave me a verification and then gave me a lot of abuse for meeting. For that reason I specifically ask not to be verified by people I meet.
I never discuss previous meets with people on here, it's none of their business who i have met and what occurred on the meet.
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We tend to value verifications as it's a way to make sure that the people we're interested in can walk the walk and don't just talk the talk. We're also fascinated with people's past experiences but that's mostly just noseyness 😃
But as with pretty much everything else - if you don't want to do it,then don't do it. |
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Veris are fine because they are public but I wouldn’t tend to volunteer who I am speaking. Why is it anyone else’s business? If someone pushed for that kind of info then it would be a big red flag. |
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I don’t mind displaying and leaving verifications although I’d never write one that was overtly sexual and I’d generally avoid displaying those.
I don’t discuss who I’m talking with or meeting though. A couple of years ago I was chatting to someone who kept pushing to know the details of club nights and socials. After asking a couple of times for them to stop, I ended up blocking them. |
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Personally I think it's bad form to discuss others, and I don't see any reason for it.
I might say something along the lines of "I'm already chatting with a couple of other people so I don't really have the time to get to know anyone else right now" but I don't see any situation where it would be appropriate to divulge who I was chatting with or hoping to meet. I generally keep my verifications hidden too.
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By (user no longer on site) 32 weeks ago
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We don't give usernames out. We say "we have a meet on friday" or something like "we are chatting to a nice couple".
We will ask people who we know would get on with others if we can give their fab name, but only with explicit consent.
Example if we meet a guy who would also enjoy meeting our friends we will say "would you like us to give your fab name to our friends? They would be your kind of folks". |
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No, in my opinion it is not ok. Maybe the person you are talking to or planning on meeting doesn't want other people to know their business.
I dont show verifications, and as a general rule, I don't give them out because I dont want other people knowing my business.
If someone has left you a verification, then they are obviously happy for people to know their business, but if they haven't then keep it to yourself  |
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No it's not ok.
Who I am seeing/talking to is no-one else's business and if anyone asked, thats the answer they would get. I've been dragged into drama before because of the whole "you've met them" carry on. |
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I never share details, apart from a select few I've left veris for and I don't give details. I don't share by talking at all. It's discretion in action.
You can look after your own privacy too, including not giving your exact location away and not using pics here that are anywhere else. |
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