FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > What puts people off swinging clubs.

What puts people off swinging clubs.

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I'm wondering what would put people off swinging clubs. And what might encourage you to go. We've met loads of couples and singles who once the've tried it always come back for more. Were just wondering if you havnt gone to one yet why havnt you. There's no rite or wrong answer here, just honesty. Thanks for reading this and looking forward to hearing your replys.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

So far its because:

A) I'm a single guy, there is an abbundance of us already and i'm not the most attractive one about so feel i'd lose out (both sexually and socially)

B) No current motor transport, so getting to and from involves expensive taxis (premium rate after dark)

Both reasons involve losing a potential £70+ and it may seem only a small amount to some people but at the moment i'm on a tight budget.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm wondering what would put people off swinging clubs. And what might encourage you to go. We've met loads of couples and singles who once the've tried it always come back for more. Were just wondering if you havnt gone to one yet why havnt you. There's no rite or wrong answer here, just honesty. Thanks for reading this and looking forward to hearing your replys. "

Pretty much 90% of the things I read on this forum puts me off going to a swinging club.

I just feel that so many of the stories, descriptions and people who write them, just don't seem to be what I'm looking for.

It's fair enough I guess, I - and my man - have more than enough fun using this website for what we get out of it. We don't need swingers clubs on top of that, maybe it'll change, maybe not.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

for us think its just teh general nerves, i know we have been told you dont have to play....... but afraid i will feel pressured and more will be expected of me than i am prepared to give on the night. probably a silly thought i know !!!!! xxx

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

i would not go as i would be scared no one would want to play with me and i would feel out of place

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

We are members of Chameleons, Darlaston. It took us a year to pluck up the courage to go.

We had preconceived ideas that the club would be full of "pretty people" and that if we went, we would feel like the odd couple, lol.

We also thought it might be full of sex predators, and pushy people.

We are happy to report that our fears were unfounded and we have really enjoyed our membership so far.

We would recommend club virgins to go and experience the club scene for yourselves. If you only meet couples, go on a couples night, all clubs have them I believe.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"for us think its just teh general nerves, i know we have been told you dont have to play....... but afraid i will feel pressured and more will be expected of me than i am prepared to give on the night. probably a silly thought i know !!!!! xxx

I feel the opposite is true of clubs. I feel that Im expected to give more on a one to one meeting. If we met another couple or a single guy then I would feel odd if I said no to full sex, but i dont feel at all perturbed to only go as far as I wish at a swinging club. Its easy to just stop and walk out of the room I am in or move away in the jacuzzi etc.

The only thing that puts me off swinging clubs is the amount of single pushy guys. Most single guys are great, friendly, good to chat to, funny etc, but then there are those that will try and touch as soon as they think im distracted by playing with my partner, ill feel an extra pair of hands on me that i havent said yes to

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

We are prof of the no preesure at Chams, we aren't Denzel Washington and Marilyn Munroe, but when u go there u feel so comfortable. I surprised myse;f how easy it was for me to 'get it on' with other people around.

Just last week we were there spent the emtire night socialising at the bar and had a great time. we never felt pressured to play and we enjoyed the fun with each other after.

Have a look at the re_iews on Chams, then give it a go, if ur uncomfortable leave. Simples

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

We've never had any fancy, and I doubt that we ever will fancy going to a swingers club.

The idea of using beds, hot tubs, jacuzzis which have been used by countless others and have christ knows what bodily fluids and other gunk on them or in them puts us off big time ... sleezy is how we regard them

No thanks ... we're probably wrong in our perception, but have no real desire to be pursuaded otherwise.

We're quite happy with the odd meet we have at home or at the occasional social.

But, as is often said, "each to their own" what works for some doesn't always work for others

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I love going to clubs as I am a bit of a voyeur and love to watch!

I also love spending time in the jacuzzi and meeting like-minded people in a safe environment.

If I find peeps that tickle my fancy while I am there, then so much the better!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

So what would be the one thing that would change your mind about going then? More couple nights, sprays and wypes to clean down the beds ect. I'm figuring that some club owner might read these post so now's the time to have a say.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I love going to clubs as I am a bit of a voyeur and love to watch!

I also love spending time in the jacuzzi and meeting like-minded people in a safe environment.

If I find peeps that tickle my fancy while I am there, then so much the better!

Took the words right out of my mouth. I'm a member of Chams so that I can relax with like minded people. If I get chance to play, so much the better. If not its a great night out with good peeps.

To one of the above... There is no pressure to do anything you dont want to.

And with respect to the "hot tubs full of icky stuff..." Dont drink it... and the showers and soap dont cost extra. ALL IMHO

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"We've never had any fancy, and I doubt that we ever will fancy going to a swingers club.

No thanks ... we're probably wrong in our perception, but have no real desire to be pursuaded otherwise.

We're quite happy with the odd meet we have at home or at the occasional social.

But, as is often said, "each to their own" what works for some doesn't always work for others

funnily enough we use club f but never play there.

spunk soaked beds are hardly appealing and guys with erections in the hot tub are a real no no.

apart from that its very relaxed and no one is at all pushy.

tho if we had to choose between clubs and meeting couples 1 on 1 clubs would come a distant second

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

i've been to a few clubs and find them to be such friendly places.

I also think they can be an instant cure for anyone with body issues....libertys do a great buffet too.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The idea of using beds, hot tubs, jacuzzis which have been used by countless others and have christ knows what bodily fluids and other gunk on them or in them puts us off big time ... sleezy is how we regard them

No thanks ... we're probably wrong in our perception, but have no real desire to be pursuaded otherwise.

We're quite happy with the odd meet we have at home or at the occasional social.

But, as is often said, "each to their own" what works for some doesn't always work for others

The beds can be full of anything, which does make it sleazy, but only if sleazy dirty people use them, there are materials to hand in most clubs to wipe beds before and after you use them, the Jacuzzi cleaning system is as good as it gets, it is no different than using public baths, gymnasiums, hotel jacuzis, sunbeds and so on.

I have often found that such equipment is sometimes cleaned by the "Last to use" and sometimes not, therefore I always clean any such equipment before I use it.

I will be honest, I think of those that don't trust the hygiene of a leatherette mattress that you can wipe before you get on it more "dodgy" for a home meet because you have to rely on thier personal hygene standards in thier own homes and if they haven't got the inclination or gumption to clean before they use ...... what about thier own sheets, beds, bathroom, settee, quilt, mattress, floor

Please don't take this personally it is a general thought because many feel the same way you do and I know for as many dodgy people in home meets there are 3 that are immaculate and hygene concious

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"We are members of Chameleons, Darlaston. It took us a year to pluck up the courage to go.

We had preconceived ideas that the club would be full of "pretty people" and that if we went, we would feel like the odd couple, lol.

We also thought it might be full of sex predators, and pushy people.

We are happy to report that our fears were

unfounded and we have really enjoyed our membership so far.

So if a club had a night set up only for a social night would you have gone there earlyer?

We would recommend club virgins to go and experience the club scene for yourselves. If you only meet couples, go on a couples night, all clubs have them I believe.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

i think i would be nervous about walking into a club on my own with being single and i think i would spend all my time in the jacuzzi. Does anyway no if the club at doncaster is open during the day?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"We've never had any fancy, and I doubt that we ever will fancy going to a swingers club.

No thanks ... we're probably wrong in our perception, but have no real desire to be pursuaded otherwise.

We're quite happy with the odd meet we have at home or at the occasional social.

But, as is often said, "each to their own" what works for some doesn't always work for others

Pretty much sums up my _iew!

I've never had sex with someone I don't know let alone a group in front of others! Nothing in the club scene appeals to me!

What I find annoying is people telling me I should try it and go! I've reached the ripe old age of 50 following my own mind.

I'm a firm believer in doing what makes you happy, clubs work for some, they do nothing for me!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *ardybumsCouple over a year ago

peekin under duvet is it safe?

"i've been to a few clubs and find them to be such friendly places.

I also think they can be an instant cure for anyone with body issues....libertys do a great buffet too.

ahhhhhhhh so thats where it all goes then eh ?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'm a single female and a member of Chams ...I am not the most confident person but I come alive when I'm at the club. It doesn't even matter if I get to play as the social aspect is just as appealing to me. Each to their own I suppose but I would highly recommend it

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *irtyGirlWoman over a year ago

Edinburgh

I haven't been put off going, I've been a couple of times but what does make me uncomfortable when I get there are the single males who insist on following me round. I have trouble making eye contact with people because I don't want to encourage that. If I want to play with someone then they'll know, I'm capable of making it clear. Following me round in such an obvious way is going to do the exact opposite.

I like to feel relaxed and having someone traipse round after me doesn't do that.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I know Chams in Newport restrict the amount of single guys now ....me and my friends have experienced single guys who just come over and start groping once there is play in motion. Mostly the guys ask though so just a minority spoil it for others.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *amschwingerzCouple over a year ago

West

Pretty much 90% of the things I read on this forum puts me off going to a swinging club.

I just feel that so many of the stories, descriptions and people who write them, just don't seem to be what I'm looking for.

It's fair enough I guess, I - and my man - have more than enough fun using this website for what we get out of it. We don't need swingers clubs on top of that, maybe it'll change, maybe not."

We are exactly the same...plus the fact we dont swing in the 'accepted sense'..its bad enough being known as 'boring vanilla's on here..let alone in a club!

The thing that really puts us off though is the stories about single guys...cant stand being hassled by people at the best of times, let alone by cock happy single blokes looking for a notch on the bedpost...

Plus the thought of HAVING to wear a towel all the time...???? in some places...why for fucks sake?

Someone mentioned in a post about 'how friendly everyone is' in a club...of course they are friendly...they want to fuck you/your wife for god sake

A salesman is 'friendly' when he wants to strip you of your life savings buying a conservatory..

We did consider socials until we were told that they are a slimmed down version of a club..again full of single guys..No offence single guys by the way, im sure some of you are very genuine and honest..some swingers want the world to know about their lifestyle, we cant run the risk of a single guy saying 'hey guess who I saw going into a swingers club/social the other night'

We have no problem with gen swinging couples...we would have no problem chatting etc in a room full of them...swingers seem a really nice non judgemental group of people..thats why we love this site..

Very good question by the OP btw..

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What puts a lot of folk off who we've spoken to is the cost.

Not so much the entrance fee, which is fair enough, but the fact that you have to buy membership.

Some may only go once in a blue moon,if ever again.

Surely the best thing would be to have free membership and just a pay as you go fee.

That would also probably mean a greater turn over of new faces too.

XXXX

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *atfreeCouple over a year ago

London

I think that's why we sometimes go

"I know Chams in Newport restrict the amount of single guys now ....me and my friends have experienced single guys who just come over and start groping once there is play in motion. Mostly the guys ask though so just a minority spoil it for others."

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 27/10/10 22:37:35]

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

For me to go to a club for the first time, i'd need someone to take me along with them, firstly so I know i'll get home safe and two it would make me feel more comfortable being with someone who knows what there doing at a club. I have a fantasy of going along with a couple and having people just watch me play, but still waiting xx

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *LLSEXEDUPMan over a year ago

Reading

"So far its because:

A) I'm a single guy, there is an abbundance of us already and i'm not the most attractive one about so feel i'd lose out (both sexually and socially)

B) No current motor transport, so getting to and from involves expensive taxis (premium rate after dark)

Both reasons involve losing a potential £70+ and it may seem only a small amount to some people but at the moment i'm on a tight budget."

Same for me

Could not have put that any better.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

i like swinging clubs over all but i have been to a few that i wouldnt go back to

what really puts me off a club is material covered play areas, you know like normal bed you get at home of fabric sofas, i just think its far to unhyginic is a place where 100s a people a week are playing on it

swinging clubs need the PVC beds that can be wiped clean and washed at the end of the night

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"So far its because:

A) I'm a single guy, there is an abbundance of us already and i'm not the most attractive one about so feel i'd lose out (both sexually and socially)

B) No current motor transport, so getting to and from involves expensive taxis (premium rate after dark)

Both reasons involve losing a potential £70+ and it may seem only a small amount to some people but at the moment i'm on a tight budget."

Well said, I find the fact they charge single guys more than couples and single women an insult and a piss take, hence I wont go. There is no reason why we should get charged more apart from the fact they know some idiots will pay it

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"So far its because:

A) I'm a single guy, there is an abbundance of us already and i'm not the most attractive one about so feel i'd lose out (both sexually and socially)

B) No current motor transport, so getting to and from involves expensive taxis (premium rate after dark)

Both reasons involve losing a potential £70+ and it may seem only a small amount to some people but at the moment i'm on a tight budget.

and won't go to nightclubs because they charge women less or nothing to get in.

Won't insure your car because most companies charge less for women drivers.

Insist on paying triple or quadruple the price for a haircut so that you are paying the same amount as women do.

What a strange life you lead

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"So far its because:

A) I'm a single guy, there is an abbundance of us already and i'm not the most attractive one about so feel i'd lose out (both sexually and socially)

B) No current motor transport, so getting to and from involves expensive taxis (premium rate after dark)

Both reasons involve losing a potential £70+ and it may seem only a small amount to some people but at the moment i'm on a tight budget.

and won't go to nightclubs because they charge women less or nothing to get in.

Won't insure your car because most companies charge less for women drivers.

Insist on paying triple or quadruple the price for a haircut so that you are paying the same amount as women do.

What a strange life you lead"

Excuse me? How have you deduced what my life is like from one statement on here. Can you give me one valid reason why single men have to pay more than women and couples in swinging clubs, apart from the fact that they can .

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *LLSEXEDUPMan over a year ago

Reading

won't go to nightclubs because they charge women less or nothing to get in.

Won't insure your car because most companies charge less for women drivers.

Insist on paying triple or quadruple the price for a haircut so that you are paying the same amount as women do.

What a strange life you lead"

LOL

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"What puts a lot of folk off who we've spoken to is the cost.

Not so much the entrance fee, which is fair enough, but the fact that you have to buy membership.

Some may only go once in a blue moon,if ever again.

Surely the best thing would be to have free membership and just a pay as you go fee.

That would also probably mean a greater turn over of new faces too.

XXXX"

Most clubs only have a minimal membership fee, Chams used to be £6 for life for couples and single fems and you got a free item of swingers jewelery on membership, I believe that has now increased to £15 for life but am not sure.

The law states that to be a member of a private club you have to have paid a membersip fee. Some clubs do charge way too much for membership.

As for entry fees, I read a re_iew about a swingers party yesterday in the CLUBS section, they charge £70 to get in but you do get a free glass of champagne on arrival, facilities include free condoms and a 4 bedroom flat.

Clubs well let's base it on the one I know best, jacuzzi x 2, steam room, sauna, erotic cinema, heated smoking area, television chill out room, group rooms, private lockable rooms and social areas, a bit more than your average bar I am sure you would agree and those facilities cost money to run without taking into account, maintenance, staffing, public liability insurance cleaning, huge special tax (on all sex venues like clubs and adult cinema's lap dancing clubs etc all in addition to normal business rates and taxes.

As for Towel clubs, again Chameleons has the towel option but you don't have to wear a towel, I never do neither does Sasha, she wears either lingerie, sexy outfits, costumes (naughty nurse etc) I wear boxers and a sexy t shirt.

I understand why some people will never use clubs and thank my stars we are not all the same but I hope people base that decsision on true facts and informed information not on inaccurate hearsay, the only way to do that is to read the club websites.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"So far its because:

A) I'm a single guy, there is an abbundance of us already and i'm not the most attractive one about so feel i'd lose out (both sexually and socially)

B) No current motor transport, so getting to and from involves expensive taxis (premium rate after dark)

Both reasons involve losing a potential £70+ and it may seem only a small amount to some people but at the moment i'm on a tight budget.

and won't go to nightclubs because they charge women less or nothing to get in.

Won't insure your car because most companies charge less for women drivers.

Insist on paying triple or quadruple the price for a haircut so that you are paying the same amount as women do.

What a strange life you lead

Interesting, i had a feeling that question would draw a blank response

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I deduced nothing you stated that charging men more than women for the same thing is a piss take, surely you are not a biggot or hypocrit and apply that philosophy to all aspects of your life ?

Why would it be wrong for one business to do it and not for another ?

Why should women pay more for a cut and blow dry than men, I have longer hair than Sasha and many other women, I always use unisex hairdresser and always have a cut, style and blow dry but pay a quarter of what Sasha pays in the same place.

Equality surely is for everyone to be equal if it is equality that you want.

As for a valid reason, it is because they can, same as nightclubs, to attract more females, (some private hire firms even charge women and couples less than men) a lap dancing club in Walsall charges women less than men.

I am not saying it is right to do it but I live in the real world and attended clubs for many years as a single guy.

There is also the fact that many but not all single guys pay less to attend a club than females and couples, they may pay less admission and membership but most single guys don't have the added costs

Babysitters

Overnight accommodation

new outfit

new hairdo

Most guys attend a club within a 1 hour drive whereas couples tend to drive further to find a club they prefer, this is hard to explain and doesn't apply to all single men but venues like the Private Club in Birmingham and Retro Club in Walsall have girls paid to take care of the guys, so guys will go there, most couples tend to avoid such clubs and will travel further afield to a club that caters for couples first and single guys second.

Like it or not it's the real world and a business, sex has always been a business and in the USA some clubs earn $15 million a year, it's no different to Football clubs, they don't want to pay ridiculous wages but they do, they have different rates of entry on the gates, a family ticket to alton towers costs less than 5 guys or girls going in a group.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"So far its because:

A) I'm a single guy, there is an abbundance of us already and i'm not the most attractive one about so feel i'd lose out (both sexually and socially)

B) No current motor transport, so getting to and from involves expensive taxis (premium rate after dark)

Both reasons involve losing a potential £70+ and it may seem only a small amount to some people but at the moment i'm on a tight budget.

and won't go to nightclubs because they charge women less or nothing to get in.

Won't insure your car because most companies charge less for women drivers.

Insist on paying triple or quadruple the price for a haircut so that you are paying the same amount as women do.

What a strange life you lead

Interesting, i had a feeling that question would draw a blank response

yeah i got the same response when the same peeps got a bit bored and brave and started getting pissy on one of my posts.

unfortunately these douche bags seem to be a by product of the forums

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I deduced nothing you stated that charging men more than women for the same thing is a piss take, surely you are not a biggot or hypocrit and apply that philosophy to all aspects of your life ?

Why would it be wrong for one business to do it and not for another ?

Equality surely is for everyone to be equal if it is equality that you want.

I am not saying it is right to do it but I live in the real world and attended clubs for many years as a single guy.

There is also the fact that many but not all single guys pay less to attend a club than females and couples, they may pay less admission and membership but most single guys don't have the added costs

Babysitters

Overnight accommodation

new outfit

new hairdo

At the end of the day i think swinging clubs over charge men, the facilities are the same for all so thats why its a piss take, and its my choice to air my opinion in an open forum . To suggest I lead a sad life for having this opinion is both rude and ignorant,

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"So far its because:

A) I'm a single guy, there is an abbundance of us already and i'm not the most attractive one about so feel i'd lose out (both sexually and socially)

B) No current motor transport, so getting to and from involves expensive taxis (premium rate after dark)

Both reasons involve losing a potential £70+ and it may seem only a small amount to some people but at the moment i'm on a tight budget.

and won't go to nightclubs because they charge women less or nothing to get in.

Won't insure your car because most companies charge less for women drivers.

Insist on paying triple or quadruple the price for a haircut so that you are paying the same amount as women do.

What a strange life you lead

Interesting, i had a feeling that question would draw a blank response

yeah i got the same response when the same peeps got a bit bored and brave and started getting pissy on one of my posts.

unfortunately these douche bags seem to be a by product of the forums"

True mate, it can be very clique on here, tends to be the same people who cant accept other peoples opinions without resulting to insults

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"So far its because:

A) I'm a single guy, there is an abbundance of us already and i'm not the most attractive one about so feel i'd lose out (both sexually and socially)

B) No current motor transport, so getting to and from involves expensive taxis (premium rate after dark)

Both reasons involve losing a potential £70+ and it may seem only a small amount to some people but at the moment i'm on a tight budget.

and won't go to nightclubs because they charge women less or nothing to get in.

Won't insure your car because most companies charge less for women drivers.

Insist on paying triple or quadruple the price for a haircut so that you are paying the same amount as women do.

What a strange life you lead

Interesting, i had a feeling that question would draw a blank response

yeah i got the same response when the same peeps got a bit bored and brave and started getting pissy on one of my posts.

unfortunately these douche bags seem to be a by product of the forums

True mate, it can be very clique on here, tends to be the same people who cant accept other peoples opinions without resulting to insults"

its pretty funny really but yeah starts to bore you off after a while, when your doing nothing more then everyone else is doing i.e telling a tale, making a witty remark

the burden of the single male ha!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"So far its because:

A) I'm a single guy, there is an abbundance of us already and i'm not the most attractive one about so feel i'd lose out (both sexually and socially)

B) No current motor transport, so getting to and from involves expensive taxis (premium rate after dark)

Both reasons involve losing a potential £70+ and it may seem only a small amount to some people but at the moment i'm on a tight budget.

and won't go to nightclubs because they charge women less or nothing to get in.

Won't insure your car because most companies charge less for women drivers.

Insist on paying triple or quadruple the price for a haircut so that you are paying the same amount as women do.

What a strange life you lead

Interesting, i had a feeling that question would draw a blank response

yeah i got the same response when the same peeps got a bit bored and brave and started getting pissy on one of my posts.

unfortunately these douche bags seem to be a by product of the forums

True mate, it can be very clique on here, tends to be the same people who cant accept other peoples opinions without resulting to insults

its pretty funny really but yeah starts to bore you off after a while, when your doing nothing more then everyone else is doing i.e telling a tale, making a witty remark

the burden of the single male ha!"

lol, they are not all like that, just the odd one, most are helpfull

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I never said you had a sad life, I said a strange life, and that is by your own words, your the one saying you will not participate in things where there is an injustice, I actually agreed that it was not right but a fact of life.

Everyone of us is badly done by in one way or another, MP's don't pay road tax for one car and don't need a TV licence, they have bars in the House of Commons and House of Lords where you can legally smoke.

Women are charged more than men for some things, Men are charged more than women for other things.

Life just isn't fair, I am sorry if I offended you, I really am, I merely wanted to point out that if you take that attitude in life there is a lot that you could miss out on at the same time some things will be to your advantage.

The examples are endless, Men on average are charged less for clothes than women. I spent £200 in Asda last night, some of the cost went to ofset the losses caused by shoplifters.

What you have to decide is wether or not the product or service is worth paying what your asked to pay, in your case you have decided against doing that, for at least one of the injustices.

What I do believe is that some things are not worth losing out on because of the injustices, I still have a TV and a licence despite the fact that the MP's don't pay because I want the enjoyment it brings.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *harpDressed ManMan over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

"Well said, I find the fact they charge single guys more than couples and single women an insult and a piss take, hence I wont go. There is no reason why we should get charged more apart from the fact they know some idiots will pay it

Yes there is. It keeps the numbers of single men down. If it was equal pricing, less women, less couples and more men would attend, and that's no fun at all.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *harpDressed ManMan over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

unfortunately these douche bags seem to be a by product of the forums

True mate, it can be very clique on here, tends to be the same people who cant accept other peoples opinions without resulting to insults"

But you're happy to get all chummy with someone who's resorting to insults in this case?

Nice display of irony there.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple over a year ago

Bolton

We go to clus but prefer home meets as they're more intimate and just different. We won't go in to dirty clubs and there are a few! What I love is people who have never been to a club and don't intend to which is different from not going yet as they're nervous but then slag them off!!! How can you make an informed opinion if you've never been in one! Some are dirty, some are sleazy, some are really clean and classy. We were very nervous before going to a club and we'd been swinging for a couple of years then, I say to someone who is liking the idea but is too nervous is to bite the bullet and go along to one! Z

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple over a year ago

Bolton

lol - I think I heard the sound of 2 dummies being thrown out of the pram! Anyway, try to play nice, I'm off to work. Z

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *andcCouple over a year ago

Cheshire and London

We have been to a club once, but soon realised that we are looking for a specific type of person, which may or may not be at a club the night we visit, so would/was hit and miss for us. It is easier and more fruitful to find people on FAB, we can meet at a mutual place for both parties and because we are willing to travel anywhere in UK, we can meet people from a greater area.

Finally, although we are a couple, we find the cost of becoming a member and the nightly fees just not worth it.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"i think i would be nervous about walking into a club on my own with being single and i think i would spend all my time in the jacuzzi. Does anyway no if the club at doncaster is open during the day? "

If you mean 101 that's closed down and only opens 1x a month now.. Nearer you are Chambers Sheffield and Partners Bury H. x

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

unfortunately these douche bags seem to be a by product of the forums

True mate, it can be very clique on here, tends to be the same people who cant accept other peoples opinions without resulting to insults

But you're happy to get all chummy with someone who's resorting to insults in this case?

Nice display of irony there."

Aaah...you beat me to it!! Was just about to post the same thing!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

funny how leaving a personal opinion makes you a Douche bag

Someone writes something it is a personal opinion, soneone says something that doesnt agree with that opinion they become part of a clique and douche bags only worthy of personal abuse

Somewhat contradictory methinks but quite common here, still, it says more about the person that writes the abuse than it does about the abused person

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *iamondladyWoman over a year ago

titsville

Pretty much 90% of the things I read on this forum puts me off going to a swinging club.

I just feel that so many of the stories, descriptions and people who write them, just don't seem to be what I'm looking for.

It's fair enough I guess, I - and my man - have more than enough fun using this website for what we get out of it. We don't need swingers clubs on top of that, maybe it'll change, maybe not.

We are exactly the same...plus the fact we dont swing in the 'accepted sense'..its bad enough being known as 'boring vanilla's on here..let alone in a club!

Plus the thought of HAVING to wear a towel all the time...???? in some places...why for fucks sake?

Someone mentioned in a post about 'how friendly everyone is' in a club...of course they are friendly...they want to fuck you/your wife for god sake

A salesman is 'friendly' when he wants to strip you of your life savings buying a conservatory..

Very good question by the OP btw..

Your opinion about people only being friendly because they want to fuck you is totally wrong! I now many people in the club that I go to that I have known a very long time and have never had sex with. People that have given me help and advise and even put me up for the night when I became stuck all with no sexual payment. You have totally the wrong idea of swingers.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *iamondladyWoman over a year ago

titsville

"So far its because:

A) I'm a single guy, there is an abbundance of us already and i'm not the most attractive one about so feel i'd lose out (both sexually and socially)

B) No current motor transport, so getting to and from involves expensive taxis (premium rate after dark)

Both reasons involve losing a potential £70+ and it may seem only a small amount to some people but at the moment i'm on a tight budget.

and won't go to nightclubs because they charge women less or nothing to get in.

Won't insure your car because most companies charge less for women drivers.

Insist on paying triple or quadruple the price for a haircut so that you are paying the same amount as women do.

What a strange life you lead

Interesting, i had a feeling that question would draw a blank response

yeah i got the same response when the same peeps got a bit bored and brave and started getting pissy on one of my posts.

unfortunately these douche bags seem to be a by product of the forums

True mate, it can be very clique on here, tends to be the same people who cant accept other peoples opinions without resulting to insults"

Where was the insult! You just don't like a differing opinion that's all.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"So far its because:

A) I'm a single guy, there is an abbundance of us already and i'm not the most attractive one about so feel i'd lose out (both sexually and socially)

B) No current motor transport, so getting to and from involves expensive taxis (premium rate after dark)

Both reasons involve losing a potential £70+ and it may seem only a small amount to some people but at the moment i'm on a tight budget."

you look alright to me, possibly a bit young though

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Never been to one and mainly because of confidence and not really sure if it is for me. Within groups and strangers I can get shy and so any confidence goes with it. On a one to one basis I am fine, maybe going as a couple will be better for me, have spoken to a lovely friendly lady about this

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *iewMan over a year ago
Forum Mod

Angus & Findhorn

they think mass orgies that are compulsory to join in.

they panic they will recognise or be recognised.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple over a year ago

Bolton

The thought that everyone will be slim and gorgeous - dressed to the nines in lovely lingerie and all very confident - it isn't like that! Z

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *umpkinMan over a year ago

near the sounds of the wimborne quarter jack!

For those who are still unsure about the cleanliness side, I`ve seen the staff at Chams checking the water samples to ensure the correct chemical content is in the jaccuzzis and I`ve also talked with the cleaning staff when leaving the hotel rooms and seen the array of cleaning equipment and potions they`re equipped with. On par with most hospitals for sure. When you pass the wet area in the club, you can smell the chlorine, much like every public swimming pool. As has previously been said, it`s no different than using any public or club facilities, hotels, gyms, hospitals etc.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

the valid reason why men pay more than women is simple because women wouldnt pay £100 a year membership and £30 each visit, MOST people who use clubs want women, couples, men and other ladies so its in the clubs best interest to let women in cheep

Would you go to a club that had no women in because they refused to pay the high prices and was full of couples looking for other couples and 5 dozes single guys wondering around with noone to play with?

its unfair but like it or not it works because i wouldnt go as a single female if i had to pay the same as guys, id find someone to go with but the problem then is going as a couple the chances are i wouldnt play with single guys as whoever i went with would probably want to play with couples so they had someone to play with too, and im sure lots of other women would be in the same boat

men on here moan a lot about the fact they pay more than women but lost are more than happy to team up with a woman to get in cheaper

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *amschwingerzCouple over a year ago

West

"For those who are still unsure about the cleanliness side, I`ve seen the staff at Chams checking the water samples to ensure the correct chemical content is in the jaccuzzis "

Not too worried about the chemical content...its languishing in someone else come and urine thats the offputting factor.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple over a year ago

Bolton

"For those who are still unsure about the cleanliness side, I`ve seen the staff at Chams checking the water samples to ensure the correct chemical content is in the jaccuzzis

Not too worried about the chemical content...its languishing in someone else come and urine thats the offputting factor.

Well in a decent place they ask for no sex in the jaccuzi and in all honesty I would hope that people wouldn't pee in there! Z

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

hmmm...interesting

We have been to several clubs but use them as a point of contact meeting & chatting to likeminded folk. If something takes our fancy we take away from the main arena (not being fans of playing to an audience by that I mean more than 6)or arrange to meet at a later date usually in a more relaxed atomsphere ie. home.

Having spent time on the make up, hair etc the thought of jumping into a steamy hot tub or swimming pool is soooo unappealing!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *i 1 Get 1 FreeCouple (MM) over a year ago

birmingham

We've been together for 22 years, one club refuse to recognise us as a couple even though we've offered to produce joint mortgage / bank a/c's / utility bills, etc., etc., it seems profit above equality is the over riding factor for some!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

whilst we understand your concerns and agree with you club owners can invite or reject anyone they want. regardless of the law.they can use any criteria they see fit.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *i 1 Get 1 FreeCouple (MM) over a year ago

birmingham

"club owners can invite or reject anyone they want. regardless of the law.they can use any criteria they see fit."

They sure can, and they most certainly do!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *empnbunkCouple over a year ago

south coast

we went to a club in manchester a few yrs back which was ok tho i personally was put off with the amount of singles guys there lol have you ever seen the film "the birds" lol all sittin perched waiting to pounce lol.then everytime we moved around they'd follow like sheep lol was creepy ...lol

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *r-MissCouple over a year ago

Derbyshire

We do like swingers clubs, although we have not been for a while.

We do look for single guys but find that many will not actually approach you at clubs and just follow you around when you change rooms without saying a word or attempting to make eye contact.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

At the end of the day, clubs are run to make a profit for the owner. Not talking about the ones someone runs from their house and joins in but the organised ones. They will charge what they think they can get ! That's business

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *edangel_2013Woman over a year ago

southend

What makes you so sure it would be a single guy who said that, single fems, and couples are just as likely to be indiscreet.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"whilst we understand your concerns and agree with you club owners can invite or reject anyone they want. regardless of the law.they can use any criteria they see fit."

Yes but that is not always a bad thing, Chameleons for instance will not allow groups of guys entry, this is because generally that can attract the wrong kind of guys, the group mentality kicks in and they tend to stay in a group within the club and move around like a pack which can put off a lot of couples/single fems.

As for the type of single male, this varies from time to time, the owners try to keep a balance of single males, sometimes they won't let larger guys join, other times it is older guys that are not permitted membership, being young or muscular can even stop you becoming a member, yes that's true, it is not a club for any one group of people, it is not all large guys, slim guys, young guys, body beautifull or old guys, they keep a close eye on attendance and increase any shortfall from time to time so that every member, couples, single fems and single guys feels comfortable with like minded and like bodied/aged people around them.

There is often a waiting list there for new single male members as they keep the balance of numbers as fair as possible so that single guys are not in overwhelming numbers but there are enough to go round, so as more couples and single females join more single guys can join, this makes the experience better for everyone.

Single guys do follow couples and single females round in many clubs, it is a bit of a catch 22 for them, if they sit around waiting to be invited it may never happen, if a couple head off to the play areas they could wait 5 minutes then take a wander down to see if they are looking for a guy(s) to join them, but if they do that someone else might get there first, catch 22, sit and be polite wait for the couple to settle and miss your chance or follow to see if they are looking for a single guy, nobody can win. Generally as soon as a couple go into a room and shut the door they wander off realising this is not the time, there are a few idiot exceptions to the rule of course.

The best advice I can give to the single guys is to chat to couples and single females in the social areas, ok some people will shun you but most will at least chat even if they are not looking to play with you. Approach in a casual, friendly way, make a conversation, "Hi your nice wanna shag" never works for me but I keep trying it.

Always approach both members of a couple if you ignore either person you will probably fail to make an impression.

Even straight guys like to chat, they like to be acknowledged, if you hope to gain thier trust and respect in order to allow you to join them it is important to speak to them, women have a mind of thier own, don't say to the guy "does she play with single guys" it is an insult to the womans intelligence assuming she cannot speak for herself.

Single women are social animals not just there to shag, they like to chat too and be respected show them you like them for themselves not just for a quickie.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

oh and guys, a six pack helps, rugged good looks doesn't do any harm but personality gets you laid.

Don't for one second think that your "not in thier/her league" you can be large, slim, tall, short, old, young, hairy, smooth, bald none of it matters, we all have different tastes and fantasies when it comes to sex, not everyone seeks Adonis, you will never know till you chat to people.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm a single female and a member of Chams ...I am not the most confident person but I come alive when I'm at the club. It doesn't even matter if I get to play as the social aspect is just as appealing to me. Each to their own I suppose but I would highly recommend it

"
I feel exactly the same as you, I too 'come alive' I feel sexy and confident, not at all the way I feel outside the club. I have found clubs (TownHouse and Chams)a great night out and I dont just mean for sex!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

i've never enjoyed the clubs in the Uk, i'm way too picky a person for them, and out of the last four clubs i've been to I found 1, yes 1 guy i'd fuck, and that happened to be the bouncer, who wasnt playing

i prefer the clubs in europe, much bigger, better environments, and the slim chance i might atcually get sex!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

lots of clubs are not very clean,

single guys follow you around in hordes

not following rules

proper nice rooms would be nicer then the black plastic covers

paper towels left everywhere

women are expected to dress up sexy where men are allowed to even keep their JACKETS on

most clubs outside the UK are far better!

all club owners should have a look and try to improve!

I wish I could open my own club!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *ay112Man over a year ago

northwest

Never been although i am very curious, been asked a few times to join others but feel i would get too nervous

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *erekduvallCouple over a year ago

swansea

Being from the "land of the moving curtain" and "cockle women" its the fear of seeing someone you know!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

We like clubs as they give us a place to meet likeminded people and not feel pressured as you sometimes do on a one 2 one meet.

we do like the company of single males and feel that at a club it's a safer enviroment then meeting at a guys house.

yes there are those who follow u around or think that they have them right to pounce the moment anything starts but they get a curt NO or we move away.

as to the cleanlissness the clubs we have been to have all been clean and to be honest the pvc beds are easier to clean then a normal fabric bed.

as to pricing i do agrre withthose who say the reason is is to keep the numbers more even , if clubs cgharges the same or prehaps more for couples then less couples would go and the ratios would be higher then they are now making things more difficult then they can be

One thing that annoys us id people ( and sorry it is normaly single guys) who think because they have paid they have a right to a shag

we have spent many a night at a club where we have only had sex with each other but still had a cracking night.

Someone ealier mentioned socials being a slimed down version of clubs, and having been to a few we can't disagree more

Yes there are a number of single guys there but it's purl;y a social thing a few drinks a a nice buffet . any paly happens away fromthe socail( be it at the hotel or someones house) and is behind closed doors meaning that if u don#t want someone there they will not be

just my tuppence worth

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

How about having seperate soft swap and full swap areas so thoughs who don't wish to full swap won't feel intimidated if they stay in the soft swap area.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

We've been to Chams in newport twice now and have not played with anyone cos there wasnt anyone decent enough to play with!We had a few drinks,had a laugh,played with my man and left.x

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *amschwingerzCouple over a year ago

West

Got to say, from a non swingers aspect..this is one of the most interesting threads we have seen here...

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

a bliddy good cleaner would be nice at some of the clubs

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What puts me off clubs is the fact I have no control over or input into who else is going to be there.

If I'm hosting a party I have absolute control over and can vouch for all the attendees. If I'm attending a party I expect and trust the host to offer the same or I don't go.

At a club, you turn up, look the part, pay your admission and you're in.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Being from the "land of the moving curtain" and "cockle women" its the fear of seeing someone you know!

But surely anyone there who knows you are there for the same reason as you.

Can't imagine them standing in your corner shop saying:

"Well then, we were up the swinging club Saturday night and guess who we seen? Jones the swap from number 9, duw duw, who'd have thought it?".

Glass houses and stones comes to mind!

XXXX

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Being from the "land of the moving curtain" and "cockle women" its the fear of seeing someone you know!

But surely anyone there who knows you are there for the same reason as you.

Can't imagine them standing in your corner shop saying:

"Well then, we were up the swinging club Saturday night and guess who we seen? Jones the swap from number 9, duw duw, who'd have thought it?".

Glass houses and stones comes to mind!

XXXX"

It isn't just about seeing someone you know - it can just as easily be about being seen by someone who knows you but you either don't see or don't know.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *erekduvallCouple over a year ago

swansea

"Being from the "land of the moving curtain" and "cockle women" its the fear of seeing someone you know!

But surely anyone there who knows you are there for the same reason as you.

Can't imagine them standing in your corner shop saying:

"Well then, we were up the swinging club Saturday night and guess who we seen? Jones the swap from number 9, duw duw, who'd have thought it?".

Glass houses and stones comes to mind!

XXXX

It isn't just about seeing someone you know - it can just as easily be about being seen by someone who knows you but you either don't see or don't know.

Deep

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *erekduvallCouple over a year ago

swansea

"Being from the "land of the moving curtain" and "cockle women" its the fear of seeing someone you know!

But surely anyone there who knows you are there for the same reason as you.

Can't imagine them standing in your corner shop saying:

"Well then, we were up the swinging club Saturday night and guess who we seen? Jones the swap from number 9, duw duw, who'd have thought it?".

Glass houses and stones comes to mind!

XXXX"

You dont know the Welsh.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Being from the "land of the moving curtain" and "cockle women" its the fear of seeing someone you know!

But surely anyone there who knows you are there for the same reason as you.

Can't imagine them standing in your corner shop saying:

"Well then, we were up the swinging club Saturday night and guess who we seen? Jones the swap from number 9, duw duw, who'd have thought it?".

Glass houses and stones comes to mind!

XXXX

It isn't just about seeing someone you know - it can just as easily be about being seen by someone who knows you but you either don't see or don't know.

Deep

Yeah. Me and Donald Rumsfelt.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"So far its because:

A) I'm a single guy, there is an abbundance of us already and i'm not the most attractive one about so feel i'd lose out (both sexually and socially)

B) No current motor transport, so getting to and from involves expensive taxis (premium rate after dark)

Both reasons involve losing a potential £70+ and it may seem only a small amount to some people but at the moment i'm on a tight budget.

and won't go to nightclubs because they charge women less or nothing to get in.

Won't insure your car because most companies charge less for women drivers.

Insist on paying triple or quadruple the price for a haircut so that you are paying the same amount as women do.

What a strange life you lead"

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Being from the "land of the moving curtain" and "cockle women" its the fear of seeing someone you know!

But surely anyone there who knows you are there for the same reason as you.

Can't imagine them standing in your corner shop saying:

"Well then, we were up the swinging club Saturday night and guess who we seen? Jones the swap from number 9, duw duw, who'd have thought it?".

Glass houses and stones comes to mind!

XXXX

You dont know the Welsh.

I was a kid in Mountain Ash and my dad was from Pontypridd.

So yes, I do know how hypocritically pious he could be, especially where sex was concerned, lol.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

we have been to lots of clubs and we find cleanliness is a must and also if there are no shower facilities that def puts us off, we love clubs with pools and a wet are and dislike clubs that are dark and dingy and smelly

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *randmrsfreakyCouple over a year ago

alfreton near chesterfield

We have not visited any clubs in this country although we have spent 4 nights in a club in Gran Canaria over the past 2 weeks.

As a couple who dont full swop we were nervous about expectations, we neednt have been.

We met some fantastic people at a bar before hand and most nights all went into the club together.

This club had good music, a great atmosphere and was clean.

This experience has spurred us on to attend clubs in England so cant wait.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

we havent been to a club yet maybe we will oneday maybe not, the reasons are, firstly with a private meet you know who your meeting, you already have an attraction know the ground rules etc.

we are not into shagging as many people as we can.

we very realy get the time to play, kids jobs etc, so we dont want to go to a club and find there isnt anyone there we want to play with.

we have been to private parties where numbers are smaller and always with just couples, and we have had fun, but most of the time they are people we already know.

also some of the things weve read on here put us off abit.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I prefer a non-club meet because it means I will have had prior contact with the people I hope to meet and play with. I would go to a club in the hope of meeting a suitable random/anonymous couple or single woman who would also need to find me attractive.

I can accommodate in the comfort of my own dwelling. It is, therefore, private and discreet. There is little risk of bumping into your boss, work collegue or the woman on the till at the local supermarket.

My sofa and bed will not contain the bodily fluids of others who have just played before me.

I do not have to wear a towel and be oggled by all and sundry nor be subjected to sights that I would choose not to see.

I understand that, as a single man, it would be an expensive way to (possibly) meet someone.

As in everything we all have our opinions and preferences; I make no criticism of others and I'm merely responding the opening statement.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *erekduvallCouple over a year ago

swansea

But surely anyone there who knows you are there for the same reason as you.

Can't imagine them standing in your corner shop saying:

"Well then, we were up the swinging club Saturday night and guess who we seen? Jones the swap from number 9, duw duw, who'd have thought it?".

Glass houses and stones comes to mind!

I was a kid in Mountain Ash and my dad was from Pontypridd.

So yes, I do know how hypocritically pious he could be, especially where sex was concerned, lol.

XX"

Some Welsh people just love to have a good natter about someone else, its a hobby, it would be a case of they "heard from so and so, that Mr and Mrs Rabbit"

Oh and its Dew Dew

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Think we must be going on the wrong days.. we never go on couples nights....

we like the clubs but find that men are always hanging back to join in.

ALso for us we find the lack of under 30s guys is a big thing for us.

So we do go but more for a night out and maybe a play if we find some interesting guys.

KAtie x

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I have been to clubs as a single lad and as part of a couple...

They are a great way to socialise with like minded people.

Although i do find some of the single guys make themselves look desperate at times,They need to socialise a little before playing (If Lucky)

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

But surely anyone there who knows you are there for the same reason as you.

Can't imagine them standing in your corner shop saying:

"Well then, we were up the swinging club Saturday night and guess who we seen? Jones the swap from number 9, duw duw, who'd have thought it?".

Glass houses and stones comes to mind!

I was a kid in Mountain Ash and my dad was from Pontypridd.

So yes, I do know how hypocritically pious he could be, especially where sex was concerned, lol.

Some Welsh people just love to have a good natter about someone else, its a hobby, it would be a case of they "heard from so and so, that Mr and Mrs Rabbit"

Oh and its Dew Dew

Well with a name like Mr and Mrs Rabbit what do you expect?

As for D*w D*w, give it a Google, my old man was forever saying it.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

But surely anyone there who knows you are there for the same reason as you.

Can't imagine them standing in your corner shop saying:

"Well then, we were up the swinging club Saturday night and guess who we seen? Jones the swap from number 9, duw duw, who'd have thought it?".

Glass houses and stones comes to mind!

I was a kid in Mountain Ash and my dad was from Pontypridd.

So yes, I do know how hypocritically pious he could be, especially where sex was concerned, lol.

Some Welsh people just love to have a good natter about someone else, its a hobby, it would be a case of they "heard from so and so, that Mr and Mrs Rabbit"

Oh and its Dew Dew

It's spelled Duw but it's pronounced Dew. I got that from Max Boyce. I know because I was there.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *erekduvallCouple over a year ago

swansea

Max Boyce!!!!!!!! says it all

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I remember first time i went to a club i never actually got thro the door, i was with the ex at the time and when we got there we just sat outside, hes always been a more outgoing person than me, ive always been quite insecure, i had images of the place being full of young slim women and i felt very uncomfy about that, as i hadnt long since had a baby so my stomach was still very flabby and my stretch marks was bring red lol so sat there we did for about a hour till he took me home

We went back a few weeks later and managed to get thro the door, my first experience wasnt my best as i didnt know the rules of clubs or even if there was any, im going back over 10 years now when they wasnt so common place and talked about as much, i remember laying on a bed and sone guy playing with me who i really didnt like and thinking..oh god have i got to do this and just laying this wishing he;d hurry up and leave me alone lol wasnt till after when i got talking to some woman who told me it was infact ok to say no to someone in there that i was ok, i know that may sound very bizzar to some people but i was only in my early/mid 20s and very new to it all and back then there wasnt swinging sites etc you could get advice from all we had ws the old MSN chat rooms and not many people hd used club in them days

i love clubs now but ive been using them a long time and im now mkore than haappyn to say no to people i dont like lmao

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

We both like clubs, you can watch, chat, join in, not play - its all up to you. The ones we have been to have all had a range of people and there is generally no real pressure.

Having said that, they are not for some - so what? If we all liked the same, life would be dull indeed.

And by the way, clubs charge more for single guys because they can, fairness does not come into it. , is Life, as they say, is not fair.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

for me its just getting over the nerves of going for the first time

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Having been invited on numerous occasions, and refused, I have finally been persuaded to attend a club with a single female. I avoid an expensive membership fee (not payable by couples or single females) and the extortionate single male entrance fee. Attending for the first time, therefore, will now cost me £10 whereas had I gone as a single male I would have been charged £80! Even putting any preconceptions to one side I would never have paid £80 to get into a club.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

The clubs in the uk are ok but not as good as Germany and Holland. The clubs here seem to me and the ones I have been to like Unit 18 are horrid,too many single men all wanting you and not taking NO for an answer,its best to go as a couple or you will get harassed. Some people do not understand the word NO

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

one ,one to take me

two, would be worried no one would want to play so i'd be sitting there like a lemon

three,i'm shy,

lots more reasons x

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

should read no-one to take me

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The clubs in the uk are ok but not as good as Germany and Holland. The clubs here seem to me and the ones I have been to like Unit 18 are horrid,too many single men all wanting you and not taking NO for an answer,its best to go as a couple or you will get harassed. Some people do not understand the word NO"

Simple solution to that would seem to be - only go to clubs on Couples nights? - we do!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

we can go together juicy lucy xxx

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

thanks misstress one look at you no one would play with me lol your too sexy hun lol xx

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"thanks misstress one look at you no one would play with me lol your too sexy hun lol xx"

I would have to disagree , juicy .

Your not bad yourself

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Can someone please give me an idea of what to expect and of the etiquette in clubs? I accept that all clubs are different but will we essentially be expected to get changed into towels and then sit in a bar waiting to be approached by other couples? Can we remained clothed until we find a couple we find attractive and want to play with? I have lookes at the club's FAQs but those sort of points are not addressed. Thanks

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *heRainManMan over a year ago

Warrington & Glasgow

Most clubs in the NW have a change into towels (for guys, lingerie or towels for the ladies) policy either at your leisure, or as soon as you enter. (The ones I've been to - A+E and Cupids - immediate, Partners and Heaven on Earth at your leisure (at Partners you pass the changing rooms on the way to the lounge, so it makes sense to get changed!) ). I haven't been to the Townhouse, but I hear that at a specific time a signal is given (ring a bell?) and then everyone gets changed.

Most of the clubs have wet areas (sauna, jacuzzi, etc.) so you need to change to use them anyway.

The clubs have lounge areas where you can socialise. If you tell us which club, someone will be able to offer 1st hand info.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I have been to a club just the once , been searching for a female partner to accompany me but its not happening at the moment . I am bit shy going in as a single male but I think I need to make a visit .

Can anyone reccomend a club in the northwest or w.mids ?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Clubs are not for me personally, I'm not sure anything would actually put me off if I went I just don't fancy the idea of them

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *asandmeCouple over a year ago

camden town

with us, it's the fact that single men won't back the hell off when told!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple over a year ago

Bolton

"with us, it's the fact that single men won't back the hell off when told!"

Go along on a couples only night, but the clubs that we go to now tend to have very well behaved guys! Z

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

In fact a lot of the guys are so well-behaved they're positiveley backward in coming forward! On one or two occasions I've taken a ready and willing partner into the group room and have been obliged to repeatedly ask single fellas to come and join us - most of them semed to be content just to stand around watching and wanking.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I have been to a club just the once , been searching for a female partner to accompany me but its not happening at the moment . I am bit shy going in as a single male but I think I need to make a visit .

Can anyone reccomend a club in the northwest or w.mids ?"

There are a few clubs in Manchester and a couple in the Midlands just look in the clubs section x

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Clubs are not for me personally, I'm not sure anything would actually put me off if I went I just don't fancy the idea of them

I know what ya mean kev . But I am sure there must be one like me that does nt flaunt it about so much and will want to play in a private room .

New sheets please lol

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Thanks for info RainMan.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I love the clubs love the social aspect not just the sex but I can play and be free total destresser for me bliss now if I can only get there lol travelling buts me off.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *thwalescplCouple over a year ago

brecon

"We did consider socials until we were told that they are a slimmed down version of a club..again full of single guys..No offence single guys by the way, im sure some of you are very genuine and honest..some swingers want the world to know about their lifestyle, we cant run the risk of a single guy saying 'hey guess who I saw going into a swingers club/social the other night'.."

Havent experienced this ourselves, and we have been to many socials, only here in Sth Wales though.

The social scene is very well established here, with as many as 200 people turning up, which makes for a fantastic night out, meeting old friends, and making new ones.

As a rough guess, I would actually say that the proportion of single guys to cpls at a social would be less than in a club, bearing in mind we have frequented chams (Newport) quite a few times too.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *thwalescplCouple over a year ago

brecon

"What puts a lot of folk off who we've spoken to is the cost.

Not so much the entrance fee, which is fair enough, but the fact that you have to buy membership.

Some may only go once in a blue moon,if ever again.

Surely the best thing would be to have free membership and just a pay as you go fee.

That would also probably mean a greater turn over of new faces too.

XXXX"

Havent been to any other club than Chams in Newport, but there the Membership fee for a couple is £6 for life, if I remember correctly.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *thwalescplCouple over a year ago

brecon

We usually arrange to meet friends when we go to the club, that way we are sure to have a great night, even if it is just socialising.

The "single predatory guys" thing can be a little off-putting, we once had a convoy of about 8 follow us around just because we played in one of the open rooms. However there does seem to have been an effort to cut down on the ratio of single guys, so its getting better. And both Jayne and I are not shy about letting guys know if we dont want them to get involved lol!

Much like swinging in general, people have different tastes, so although I would encourage people to give it a go, I can understand that some will not for various reasons.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *ibrosMan over a year ago

harrow

I love ourplacefor fun. The organisers have strict rules for single guys and enforce them. Putting hands on a lady without first asking and getting permission is just not done.

I love the environment and feel quite at home. Whether you are invited to play depends on your social skills, so yes, there is a risk. You may have to go outside your comfort zone, but that happens in a vanilla environment too.

From what I have seen, females are treated with respect. No one is expected to play and a good number will come just to watch and take in the atmosphere.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *ibrosMan over a year ago

harrow

[Removed by poster at 18/12/10 15:56:27]

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *abioMan over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"I love ourplacefor fun. The organisers have strict rules for single guys and enforce them. Putting hands on a lady without first asking and getting permission is just not done.

From what I have seen, females are treated with respect. No one is expected to play and a good number will come just to watch and take in the atmosphere."

I would expect most clubs worth there salt would have rules of conduct regardless of whether it is single men or couples... as couples can be as bad in clubs as single guys

Actually the best clubs tend to be fairly "self policing" as if stuff is done wrong tend to be told straight away....

chatting to people and most couples are shocked that I am not a "greedy girl night" person... I tend to stick to mixed nights only... and my biggest bug bear is actually single guys who wont say boo to a goose... patrol all the play areas, and then if there are any playing, tend to be the 1st ones with there cocks out.....

I find mixed nights for me tend to be a lot more sociable which suits me....

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'm glad this was posted because the thought did cross my mind (to visit a club/social) but after reading the _iews here, I'm gonna give it a miss. Sounds like couples and single women benefit the most. I'd be worried about hygiene too. maybe once i'm coupled, I'll reconsider.

probably be a while though...

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *ohnsusCouple over a year ago

Chesterfield

We've been going to swinging clubs now for about 3 years and love them. We've been to Chams at Darlaston, The Attic in Derby and La Chambre in Sheffield.

A lot of people seem to have misconceptions of what clubs are really like (seedy, dirty, free for alls etc) and newbies often say they're pleasantly suprised at the reality compared to their often negative expectations.

For those who maybe don't want to be watched most clubs do have lockable private playrooms where you can have fun without being seen. Most people we've found are respectful but of course you can get the odd idiot, as in life. Usually there are staff or other patrons who can police the situation.

We were nervous when we started as everyone is (yes we sat in the car for half an hour before screwing up the courage to go in ! lol). Of course they're not going to be for everyone but what we would say is go in with an open mind and try it for yourself. You can read all the mixed re_iews you want but you have to make your own mind up ultimately.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

As already mentioned before, I love going to clubs, and am now a member of Chams as a single fem.

The staff there look after me, and I always feel very at ease from the moment I arrive.

I have not encountered too much unwanted attention, only the odd wandering hand or grope, which is delt with swiftly by a polite no thank you and icy stare afterwards if I feel I am being followed. Nothing that I cannot handle.

A good way to explore clubs is to participate in an organised event. This way, one will not be on his/her/their own, as there will be others about to show them the ropes and guide them etc...

Give clubs a go and decide for yourselves before dismissing them based on re_iews I'd say.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *umpingJackFlashMan over a year ago

Somewhere near you?

If it wasn't so expensive for single guys I'd probably try a club. I know the idea is to keep the numbers of single guys down by being expensive to them. But surely a better way of policing the numbers of single guys would be to require a recomendation first from a couple who are already members, then require the guys to "phone in advance" if they are going to attend on their own. Then they can set their limits for greedy girl nights or "normal" nights!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *arambarMan over a year ago

swindon

"As already mentioned before, I love going to clubs, and am now a member of Chams as a single fem.

The staff there look after me, and I always feel very at ease from the moment I arrive.

A good way to explore clubs is to participate in an organised event. This way, one will not be on his/her/their own, as there will be others about to show them the ropes and guide them etc...

Give clubs a go and decide for yourselves before dismissing them based on re_iews I'd say.

That's a good idea - I mean the attending an organised event. Am I correct in assuming that you don't need to already be a member of the club to attend such an event?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

tons of single guys who never ask just think its there right to just join in not all let me just add ok

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *abioMan over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"tons of single guys who never ask just think its there right to just join in not all let me just add ok"

you do get that....

some singles guys are just too tight to pay... sorry but it is true.. heard that said at more than one house party

some singles guys won't go because for the money they are paying apparently that is no "guarentee of action" (i really hate that phrase.. but i have heard it used by more than one occasion)

hence the well worn phrase "i want a handholder to go with me..."

and lets finally tell it like it is on a lot of occasions....lets be honest now

do you know what the biggest impediment to single guys...... its other single guys!!!! and that is the truth

Single guys who don't know how to behave.. who decide to touch without asking...who decide they won't try out other areas if there aren't naked people in there... who won't say boo to a goose, who are the first people who have there cocks out anytime anyone is on a bed.... who loiter outside playing rooms and patrol all the playing areas in packs like hyenas praying on meat!

if single guys acted like normal human beings then clubs would be more inclined to let more in instead of placing limits... and couples would be more inclined to play with single guys full stop!!

its true....

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Thats why ive not been in a year. Thats so true would hold ya hand but am miles away x

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple over a year ago

Bolton

Single guys don't put us off going to clubs - you can always go on couples only nights, but a few months ago we were in a club that was very quiet, we decided to have a play on our own anyway and a couple of single guys came in and watched. No problem so far, I didn't fancy either of them so made no move to invite them, one decided to try to grab me - still not a major problem, I politely said no and he slammed out saying 'right, I'll leave you to it then!' We had a giggle and carried on! Z

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Can't afford it sob sob

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I've never been to a club as I just could not play with a stranger and was also concerned of married men attending but did sometimes wonder what the clubs were like...now however after reading some replies on here....I do not think I will ever visit one.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Oh dear, there I was all ready to try a club for the first time but after reading more of this thread my initial reservation have returned. I'm with you Dirtydesires and do not think clubs are for me.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago
Forum Mod

Personally I would'nt let anyone elses opinion of anything stop me from doing something that I wanted to try

I would make my own mind up myself

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Oh dear, there I was all ready to try a club for the first time but after reading more of this thread my initial reservation have returned. I'm with you Dirtydesires and do not think clubs are for me."

I am certainly not tarring them all with the same brush but have heard many negative comments about clubs in general and like you have many reservations to begin with anyway, so will give them a miss...but I do know many Fab members attend and love them...just not for me...

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Don't worry Dirtydesire you have not persuaded me one way or the other. I already had reservations about clubs but was asked to accommpany a female friend to a 'Black and White' night at a well known club. With reservations I agreed that I would attend an event with her at some point in the future... but after reading all the comments 'for' and 'against' I am inclined to my original _iew.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"That's a good idea - I mean the attending an organised event. Am I correct in assuming that you don't need to already be a member of the club to attend such an event?"

That is true for Chams at least - just need to pay the normal entrance fee for single fem/gent or couple, no need for membership fee.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *abioMan over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"I've never been to a club as I just could not play with a stranger and was also concerned of married men attending but did sometimes wonder what the clubs were like...now however after reading some replies on here....I do not think I will ever visit one."

don't be put off by it.. and this is what I will say

The good points of most clubs will always outweigh the bad... people have there pre-conceived notions of what a club is going to be like, but until YOU walk through the doors you will never know...

when you walk thru that door and see that people are normal, just like you, those notions will go away.....

people will talk to you, we all remember what is was like the first time we went, and some of the stories will make you laugh and laugh

some single guys aren't always the best, but at all times no means no, and the true genuine single blokes will always stand out.....

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

don't be put off by it.. and this is what I will say

The good points of most clubs will always outweigh the bad... people have there pre-conceived notions of what a club is going to be like, but until YOU walk through the doors you will never know...

when you walk thru that door and see that people are normal, just like you, those notions will go away.....

people will talk to you, we all remember what is was like the first time we went, and some of the stories will make you laugh and laugh

some single guys aren't always the best, but at all times no means no, and the true genuine single blokes will always stand out....."

My reservations are none of what you mentioned, I simply could not be intimate with a stranger, so clubs do not appeal to me anyway....

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

As a single guy ( I know one of many) its simply the cost. One club in London charges £70 for an afternoon session.

And £50 at the door at night.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *abioMan over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

My reservations are none of what you mentioned, I simply could not be intimate with a stranger, so clubs do not appeal to me anyway...."

in which case then with the greatest of respect if you basing it on that, as well as on "hearsay" then you were never going to go.... and that the thread isn't really aimed at you....

others then should bear that in mind in this thread.....

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *abioMan over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"As a single guy ( I know one of many) its simply the cost. One club in London charges £70 for an afternoon session.

And £50 at the door at night. "

I don't worry so much about the cost.... it just means that you can't go "as often" then....

if people want to go, they will find a way, and if that means saving up.. then it means saving up!!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

My reservations are none of what you mentioned, I simply could not be intimate with a stranger, so clubs do not appeal to me anyway....

in which case then with the greatest of respect if you basing it on that, as well as on "hearsay" then you were never going to go.... and that the thread isn't really aimed at you....

others then should bear that in mind in this thread..... "

One of the questions in the opening thread was, if you haven't gone, why not? I was answering that!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *arambarMan over a year ago

swindon

"That's a good idea - I mean the attending an organised event. Am I correct in assuming that you don't need to already be a member of the club to attend such an event?

That is true for Chams at least - just need to pay the normal entrance fee for single fem/gent or couple, no need for membership fee.

Thanks, Pearl. I'm gonna be keeping my beady eyes open for the next Social at Chams

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *umpingJackFlashMan over a year ago

Somewhere near you?

"As a single guy ( I know one of many) its simply the cost. One club in London charges £70 for an afternoon session.

And £50 at the door at night.

I don't worry so much about the cost.... it just means that you can't go "as often" then....

if people want to go, they will find a way, and if that means saving up.. then it means saving up!!"

Lol it must just be my Yorkshireman's attitude! I aint a skinflint but the cost just doesn't seem reasonable to me. I'd rather meet someone off of here and entertain them. We could have a damn good drink and a meal and good company, all for less than the price of a singles admission and membership charge. Sounds like the better deal to me.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"tons of single guys who never ask just think its there right to just join in not all let me just add ok

you do get that....

some singles guys are just too tight to pay... sorry but it is true.. heard that said at more than one house party

some singles guys won't go because for the money they are paying apparently that is no "guarentee of action" (i really hate that phrase.. but i have heard it used by more than one occasion)

hence the well worn phrase "i want a handholder to go with me..."

and lets finally tell it like it is on a lot of occasions....lets be honest now

do you know what the biggest impediment to single guys...... its other single guys!!!! and that is the truth

if single guys acted like normal human beings then clubs would be more inclined to let more in instead of placing limits... and couples would be more inclined to play with single guys full stop!!

its true....

I dont mind being a handholder if they have the transport lol plus I am a member but a lot dont like to travel this is what puts them off even though I have offered to go halves on petrol and entrance fee

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Clubs are not just based on the sexual side of things chams has a great relaxing atmosphere hard to expain and I love the social side of things sometimes I play sometimes I dont my choice but either way I always have a great night out.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What puts people off?

The people, mostly!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I totally agree about the social side at Chameleons. Sometimes I have just used it to relax in, especially if I have stuck on the blasted motorway for some time....a soak in the jacuzzi, chill out in the steam room and some conversation at the bar...feel almost human again!! and if anything else happens...well thats a bonus

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *he BananamanMan over a year ago

WORCESTERSHIRE

i go to chameleons and as a single mature guy i do not feel left out at all,it is a great atmosphere and people are warm & friendly and will engage in conversations with strangers.

i find the jacuzzi and sauna are great places to get chatting to people as well as for relaxing,i will be renewing my membership in 2011 for sure!.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *i 1 Get 1 FreeCouple (MM) over a year ago

birmingham

The price, if we attended Chams we'd be charged the rate of sngle guy's

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The price, if we attended Chams we'd be charged the rate of sngle guy's

That so wrong,so you would have to pay 2 single guys price when you are a couple?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *thwalescplCouple over a year ago

brecon

"What puts people off?

The people, mostly!"

Nice.... bet you are a wow at parties!!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *i 1 Get 1 FreeCouple (MM) over a year ago

birmingham

"That so wrong,so you would have to pay 2 single guys price when you are a couple?"

Yes, we had this discussion with senior management at Chams, although we've been together 22 years and can prove it via joint mortgage / bank a/c's etc., etc., they refuse to recognise us as a couple, there "excuse" if we do for one, we'd have to do it for every "male" couple.

Oh, they said we could attend on "Bi" night

We're not into attending Gay venue’s, we prefer the social aspect with other swinger's, hence, why we attend social events.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"That so wrong,so you would have to pay 2 single guys price when you are a couple?

Oh, they said we could attend on "Bi" night

We're not into attending Gay venue’s, we prefer the social aspect with other swinger's, hence, why we attend social events."

Surely thats discriminatling (sorry about spelling) you both for being in a same sex relationship?

You would think in this day and age they would change the rules x

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *i 1 Get 1 FreeCouple (MM) over a year ago

birmingham

"Surely thats discriminatling "

No, it's a private members club, and therefore they make the rules!

Doesn't mean we have to agree with them!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *umpingJackFlashMan over a year ago

Somewhere near you?

"Surely thats discriminatling

No, it's a private members club, and therefore they make the rules!

Doesn't mean we have to agree with them!

Hang on, if a hotel can be done for discriminating against same sex couples as I belive one was this year, then the club should tread very warily as they could find themselves in court.

It would make more sense for them to be "progressive" and set an example to other swingers clubs and allow same sex couples, who can prove they are a couple, to register as couples.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *amschwingerzCouple over a year ago

West

"Surely thats discriminatling

No, it's a private members club, and therefore they make the rules!

Doesn't mean we have to agree with them!

Im not so sure about that...if they put 'no blacks or pakistanis' they wouldnt get away with it under the race relations act...so it could be the same under the equal opps act..

Interesting...any briefs in da house?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *abioMan over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"That so wrong,so you would have to pay 2 single guys price when you are a couple?

Oh, they said we could attend on "Bi" night

We're not into attending Gay venue’s, we prefer the social aspect with other swinger's, hence, why we attend social events."

I looked the changes in the law that came into effect on the 1st october, and this is what we just about figured out....

reading thru the act as we speak now

the protected status's in the act are....

disability, gender realignment, Pregnancy and Maternity, race, religion, Sex and Sexual Orientation.....

doesn't say anything about marital status though..... therefore if you go as a "couple" and consider yourself to be a "couple", then that isn't covered....

so they can charge couples differently then they can singles.......

so from what I read, Technically you can't differently charge single guys and single fems...... or between Couples (MM),Couples (MF) and Couples (FF)

However in Clubs CAN still have different rules attached to the different types (so before two single guys decide to test the "couple" thing.... I wouldn't be surprised if they put in a "stay together play together" clause to make people think twice about it......)

under the act you are Allowed to positively discriminate for groups of people that are "under represented" as long as you can show that such measures are useful for redress the balances....

and we all know that people section under-represented at clubs are "single fems"....

so that is why you can charge people different amounts.....

this applies to all sorts of clubs including private members ones.... so if you have the documents from your civil ceremony if you have had one then I don't see how they can then discriminate......

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *umpingJackFlashMan over a year ago

Somewhere near you?

"That so wrong,so you would have to pay 2 single guys price when you are a couple?

Oh, they said we could attend on "Bi" night

We're not into attending Gay venue’s, we prefer the social aspect with other swinger's, hence, why we attend social events.

I looked the changes in the law that came into effect on the 1st october, and this is what we just about figured out....

reading thru the act as we speak now

the protected status's in the act are....

disability, gender realignment, Pregnancy and Maternity, race, religion, Sex and Sexual Orientation.....

doesn't say anything about marital status though..... therefore if you go as a "couple" and consider yourself to be a "couple", then that isn't covered....

so they can charge couples differently then they can singles.......

so from what I read, Technically you can't differently charge single guys and single fems...... or between Couples (MM),Couples (MF) and Couples (FF)

under the act you are Allowed to positively discriminate for groups of people that are "under represented" as long as you can show that such measures are useful for redress the balances....

and we all know that people section under-represented at clubs are "single fems"....

so that is why you can charge people different amounts.....

this applies to all sorts of clubs including private members ones.... so if you have the documents from your civil ceremony if you have had one then I don't see how they can then discriminate......

A very in depth answer to the question, and I'd like to say thank you for it, as I hadn't had the time to do the research yet.

But I still see a minefield for the clubs if they stick to their rules as they stand. Firstly if they are going to require FF and MM couples to prove there connection to each other then the same criteria will have to be applied to MF couples or else they are still discriminating.

As for the idea of a "stay together play together" clause that could be a whole different kettle of fish, and I cant see how it could be applied.

Regarding "Technically you can't differently charge single guys and single fems" and the technicality of "under the act you are Allowed to positively discriminate for groups of people that are "under represented" as long as you can show that such measures are useful for redress the balances...." I would have to question whether it is in fact a fit way to redress the balance. As where there is a positive there must be a negative. And other ways to balance out the number of couples of all types/single fems/single guys could be applied just as reliably and without a discriminatory difference in the entrance fee.

I'm going to bow out and leave it to the legal guys if something like this ever does go to court. My brain cells wont take much more!

But, very well put Fabio and thanks again.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *abioMan over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

the reason I looked into it for my local club is that some single guys thought they could try and use the changes in the law to either drop the prices for entry.... when actually what would have more likely happened would that clubs would have either started charging single women the same as single men... or just gone couples only....

all a club would really need to do in regards to single women would be for a couple of weeks put the price up... show the women that would desert it... and then put it back down again....

the couples stuff is always interesting... waiting to see if a MM couple will end up challenging this, I think in law this would need defining...

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *umpingJackFlashMan over a year ago

Somewhere near you?

"the reason I looked into it for my local club is that some single guys thought they could try and use the changes in the law to either drop the prices for entry.... when actually what would have more likely happened would that clubs would have either started charging single women the same as single men... or just gone couples only....

all a club would really need to do in regards to single women would be for a couple of weeks put the price up... show the women that would desert it... and then put it back down again....

the couples stuff is always interesting... waiting to see if a MM couple will end up challenging this, I think in law this would need defining..."

Just heard on the radio mf couples challenging for the right to civil partnerships rather than marriage. Wonder how that will go down in the courts.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *i 1 Get 1 FreeCouple (MM) over a year ago

birmingham

"However in Clubs CAN still have different rules attached to the different types (so before two single guys decide to test the "couple" thing.... "

Very interesting _abio, and thank you for taking the time to research.

Challenging any clubs rules creates an issue in itself, how many MM / FF couples could ride the publicity generated by challenging such a decision, a large portion of the general public / red top press have a different opinion towards swingers

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *ittlemorespiceCouple over a year ago

North Cornwall

[Removed by poster at 24/12/10 00:18:16]

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *ittlemorespiceCouple over a year ago

North Cornwall

"For me to go to a club for the first time, i'd need someone to take me along with them, firstly so I know i'll get home safe and two it would make me feel more comfortable being with someone who knows what there doing at a club. I have a fantasy of going along with a couple and having people just watch me play, but still waiting xx"

move closer!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *amschwingerzCouple over a year ago

West

Reading all the very interesting replies here we have concluded that clubs are not for the faint hearted and for us, even as non swingers the negatives that have been high lighted seem to outweigh the positives..

If you are of that hardy breed it seems you have to be very tolerant of...

Groups of single blokes following you

Pushy or rude d*unken people

Dirty rooms and spunky beds

People helping themselves to a free grope

Ok there is an argument that you can go and get the management to sort them out..and not all clubs are like that...but it seems like you have to put up with a lot of grief in the first place in order to get what your looking for.

Maybe some people are more desperate than others so thats why they will be happy to go to the seedier sleazy places...while others are a little more particular.

Reading the responses from people here highlights the fact that people who use these forums tend to be 'proper' genune and decent swingers..

As non swingers totally take our hats off to you for having the nuts to go in the first place and enjoy doing what you do...

This has been one of the best threads we have read here...and an insight.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *harpDressed ManMan over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

"Reading all the very interesting replies here we have concluded that clubs are not for the faint hearted and for us, even as non swingers the negatives that have been high lighted seem to outweigh the positives..

The thread title doesn't invite a balanced _iew, really.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *harpDressed ManMan over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

The thread title doesn't invite a balanced _iew, really.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *habsMan over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

1) "But we're a couple.. why won't you play with us?" (as said to another couple).

2) "If you play with me then you don't play with anyone else" (as said by one single fem)

3) "Any action over there?" as an indiscriminate number of single chaps go rushing over at the sight of a fem within remote proximity of a play area, cock out, wanking themselves to oblivion in the hope she's actually up for a gangbang. Not that they'd ask - first chance they'd get they're in there ("Oh, I thought I could join in?!" as one guy once said to myself and a friend).

4) Couples/single Fems who think the "locked door means no entry" rule only applies to single guys.

However... these are all down to the (lack of proper) behaviour of the individuals concerned and not groups of people in general - and it certainly has not put me off going to clubs

If anything, one thing that would stop me going would be club owners that pretty much rolled out the red-carpet for couples and single girls and letting them break whatever rule under the sun, while treating single guys purely as cash cows.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Why not just make up your own mind and go and check out a good club yourseves. Yes these are peoples opinions but you can only make a decision if you have seen a well run club yourselves all the positive feedback on the club re_iews are reasons why people love clubs so dont knock it till you have tried it. I absolutely love the club scene and whats great is that you can do what you want without being judged everyone is there for the same reason and the atmosphere is electric and for me it is a total destresser.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Plus no two weeks are the same wait till you get the eureka moment one week can be totally amazing one can be totally chilled or the next can blow your mind the experience is whatever you make it.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *iteskinMan over a year ago

Cardiff/Newport/Bristol/M4

drugs

d*unks

cliques

uncleen premises

but then it was about ten years ago since i went to one

have they changed

????

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Depends which ones you went to was never a fan of the retro club but thats my opinion found it dirty and seedy tried it once never again found the right place for me and thats chameleons I travel all the way from peterborough because I love it that much.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *amschwingerzCouple over a year ago

West

"Why not just make up your own mind and go and check out a good club yourseves. Yes these are peoples opinions but you can only make a decision if you have seen a well run club yourselves all the positive feedback on the club re_iews are reasons why people love clubs so dont knock it till you have tried it. I absolutely love the club scene and whats great is that you can do what you want without being judged everyone is there for the same reason and the atmosphere is electric and for me it is a total destresser."

No point in us going...but I take your well made point...the trouble is if you read about the d*unks, drugs, cliques, dirty beds, (I wont drink out of someone else glass let alone lay on a bed of someones cold cum! lol)single blokes stalking you, and the feeling that you might not fit in then your not, as someone who has never been before your not going to want to waste money seeing if all things are true..

I wish we had a different stand point sometimes because im naturally inquisitive and a bit of a 'people watcher' especially as most swingers come across as pretty nice people.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I wish we had a different stand point sometimes because im naturally inquisitive and a bit of a 'people watcher' especially as most swingers come across as pretty nice people.

Hand on heart I have never had a bad experince at chams why not try one of the socials they are great and a great way to meet other fabsters bbws are great or fems beach party but that wont be till summer just keep a check of events and Most of the good regular visitors especially the ladies carry little hand bag with Disinfectant Spray or wipes and I always clean a room once im finished its about having respect for the place which most do have.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *reshforu2Couple over a year ago

Exeter

What's put us off a certain club is that after writing a re_iew, the owners have threatened to tell all our neighbours about our nights out!!

Have reported them but alas admin don't seem to have done nothing about it!!

Fantastic way to deal with a re_iew you don't like!!

We have had countless mail agreeing with our re_iew, but seems like the owners have got their "clique" to run us down personally. Classic.

Will stick with our tried and trusted fun filled nights out!!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *n need of helpCouple over a year ago

hull

the cost

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'd love to try it but nearest club to me is quite a way away. Also think being ignored or rejected might put me off. Apologies in advance to those who attend clubs if I've got it wrong and that you all are really nice and approachable.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Most clubs I have attended have been with a warm welcome people invite you in and actually chat to you its not like walking into a strange pub and everyone turns and stares.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *amschwingerzCouple over a year ago

West

I wish we had a different stand point sometimes because im naturally inquisitive and a bit of a 'people watcher' especially as most swingers come across as pretty nice people.

Hi Shaz..Yes we did actually consider a social until a member of here gave us a heads up about our local one..hubs cant cant take the chance of being recognised by the copious amounts of single males that attend though due to work and once people know we dont swing they probably wont want to waste their time chatting to us anyway, I believe 'vanillas' is the term? , Hubs just reminded me of a post we received where we were referred to us as 'boring' vanillas, which isnt really fair as most people we have spoken to will tell you we are a lot of fun.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

id love to go but havent got the confidence lol plus i dont have anyone to take me

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

i dont fancy going outside in a towel for a cigarette

Brrrrrrrrrrr

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

There are heaters and when its really cold we sneak a fag in conservatory

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"id love to go but havent got the confidence lol plus i dont have anyone to take me

I go on my own all the time and I promise you, I've never felt out of it - I always end up chatting to people. You can meet me there sometime if you ever fancy it? x

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

aw thanks it is on my list of to do but i just never get round to it lol

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)